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Old 03-04-2010, 09:20 AM   #184
Apocalipstic
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Princess4u View Post
sometimes...i watch the world spinning around me....ppl going on w their lives....live going on in general....while i sit in my existance, stuck..sometimes its a comfort...but mostly its just a reminder of all that was taken away....its seems to me the harder I try to keep the past in the past....and put distance and time between me and IT....the harder the past tries to rear its ugly head and remind me there is no place to hid....there is no one's arms safe enough for shelter (even if there was someone here) and there is nothing I can do that will allow me to forget....funny how when you think you have it all figured out....you turn around with that victory grin upon your face and guess who is waiting right there in front of you when you least expect it......THE PAST!!!.
I have spent all my life trying to forget. In my younger days I tried every drug I could get my hands on and participated in some very risky behavior trying to forget. I've been to years of therapy, Vanderbilt Psychiatry and loads of different medicines.....

But nothing has made me forget.

Time has softened a few of the edges maybe....but I remember way too much.

I am now trying Brain Spotting to see if that will help?

My therapist says I won't forget, ever. But we can try to make things easier to remember.

I totally get what you are saying and I wish I knew how to forget too.
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