[Sachita]

Reading this post, by you Linus really resonated with me. Like you I have big projects and responsibilities. I am famous for biting off more then I can chew and then hustling to put it all together. I am by far my worse enemy. Maintaining balance is something I have to work very hard at. Even though my logical mind knows that my health is paramount to my success I often slip into sabotage. part of me things this is almost a self destructive thing that lingers in my spirit. Another part of thinks its my inner child rebellion against all all the responsibly and demand a chance to play. I am a fucking die-hard who will work myself to insanity because I'm too stubborn to give up. With my strengths also comes my weaknesses & they often battle. This is often true with eccentric people.

The people around me play a big part in my life and happiness. If I am around people that drain my energy I get off kilter and self destructive. If I'm around highly motivated people I'll feed off that and I'm full speed ahead. I try not to allow too many cartoon people in my life all at once. But the reality is that sometimes I just get to the point where I've had enough. With every single ounce of motivation I have left I have to MAKE myself get up and move. It starts by getting out of bed, taking a short walk, taking a shower and getting dressed. Sometimes working at home we fall into ruts, laziness and spend the day in pajamas. We work crazy hours and we don't eat right. I have to work hard to pull myself back in line. This takes action and that action leads to more. I am lost without meditation. I would have no discipline without it.

Lately I am having a problem keeping motivated. I think that its because I'm unsure of a few things, unfinished business and indecisive about my next move. This puts my Taurean nature into a tail spin. I need some electric spirits around me right now. People who eat healthy, think consciously and can inspire me. I may have to seek them out. I also take lots of breaks, go for drives and spend time with my granddaughter. She makes me think about things and wanting a better life for her naturally makes me want to work harder.