A butch friend of mine experienced a major change in her attitude toward many things in her life following the death of her partner two years ago. One change is she was always a top, and now she is taking great pleasure in giving AND receiving. The other is, prior to an including her relationship with her late partner, she would have descibed herself as a "u-haul lesbian."She moved quickly into relationships and suffered greatly both financially and emotionally when they ended, no matter who called it quits. She also is on who is "wired" for monogamy, but is experiencing this time in a different way. Her partner lives far enough away (2 1/2 hours) that it is not practical to see her every day, but they spend most week ends together and talk and email frequerntly throughout the day. She is taking things slowly for the first time in her life, and she is both glad of this change in herself, and stressed by the fact that she and her new ladyfriend are not able to spend more time together. What is surprising to me about the whole thing is MY reaction to it.
I was married for 25 years to my deceased darling. I am very monogamous, though like some of you I have some regrets about that proclivity in myself. LOL. Since hubbies death I had one relationship that ended a few months ago. Following the u-haul pattern, we moved in together much too quickly. Anyway, I find my friends relationship to be an interesting and wonderful way of relating, and it is surprising to me because I tend to bond quickly with a partner... (I'm a scorpio - does that explain it?) and to long to be with them when they are away from me. Perhaps the busy-ness of my life, plus the certainty of the week-end time together alleviates that somewhat.
Who says you can't teach an old dog new tricks? Seems like many of us are LOOKING at things in a new way at least.
Hope Hurricane Isaac goes not bring bad events in to any of your lives; we seem to have dodged the bullet here in Florida. But now that the storm is heading toward Louisiana, everyone I talk to says they wish it had worn itself out here in Florida where it was only a tropical storm, rather than go and ransack those people who still suffer so much as a result of Catalina seven years ago.
Smooches,
Keri
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