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Old 08-30-2012, 02:22 AM   #723
Jaques
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Originally Posted by Sun View Post
Hey Everyone

I recently reconnected with my Mom again after 16 years of her
cutting me off. Mom is very conservative Jehovahs Witness.

My life choices were just unceptable to her. While my siblings, childhood friends, friends ofbthe family and High School friends all had no trouble with my gender evolution, my Mom is in denial and does not want to discuss this.

I am very out and visible as a volunteer with 2 Narional groups. One is religious the other political. It would be impossible to avoid my male identity if she wanted to. When my sister refers to me in male pronouns or my nephews call me Uncle, Mom gets upset.

Everyone who saw me grow up gets me and can see a natural evolution.

I find myself wondering how to engage with my Mother in an authentic way.

Has anyone been through anything similar?

Thank you.
...........my parents had been "promote to Glory" as they say in the salvation army when they die, so i never had this problem, however i did have grown children, 2 sons and it wasnt easy and took a lot of time/patience. as you rightly quote on the bottom of your posts "choose love" - your mum loves you and wants the best for her child - however old you are, a parent still sees their offspring as their child and is protective of him/her. I feel the best way through this type of situation is to understand that whilst you are undoubtedly eager for acceptance, your mum has beliefs and feelings which dont allow her, at this moment in time, to see it from your view. I have found that patience, time and love helps enormously. Its not easy I know and your mum may never be able to accept who you are, which doesnt mean she doesnt love you - your own acceptance of her feelings would help. Unfortunately, we cant always have it the way we would wish but understanding that can help you deal with your own feelings.............
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