[theoddz]

I pass as a cis guy all the time.....unless I out myself, then I get a lot of jaw drops. I am post-op and have been on T for going on 6 years now. I think there are a few physical characteristics that people take, at first sight, as "automatic" indicators of gender. In particular, things like a man's size (a lot of the time), deep voice, facial hair, etc., that tells someone "okay, he's a guy", or "okay, she's a woman" (breasts, features, size, voice, etc.). Most people, I don't think, are really in tune to transfolk, so unless there's something that just obviously sticks out, their minds just aren't geared to automatically pick up on things right away. There are things, I think, which amount to certain behaviors, mannerisms, finer details, that some people might pick up on after first sight impressions, that might "out" a trans person, but these are secondary things and some are so slight that they might not even be noticed until after getting to know a trans person more. That's been my observation, at least.

That being said, I do want to add that I don't think I have a lot of the more "negative" (so to speak) attitudes or feelings of entitlement to "privilege" that many cis men do. In the company of my XY brothers, I think that it is noticed when I don't join in or engage in the nut-scratching, knuckle-dragging, female bashing behaviors that men sometimes engage in when not in the company of females. Yes, men do act differently when women aren't present and some of that behavior can be pretty gross. I thought so when I was perceived as "female" and I still think so, now that I am presenting as completely (cis) male. I like to think that I'm a male feminist and other (cis) men take notice of it. I've gotten quite a few raised eyebrows after I've popped off to these guys for their gross behavior.....and I do it unapologetically. I do have to say that when I call their behavior/comments out, I do it in the context of, "How would you feel if someone said that about your wife/girlfriend/daughter/sister??".

My roots are in the GLBTQ community. I lived 45 years in a "female" skin, although that was horribly uncomfortable for me, but it was enough to know that rude, crass, sexist, obnoxious behavior isn't attractive in anyone and it only makes whomever exhibits it less appealing, whomever they are. It just makes me angry.

I don't necessarily want to be perceived as either a transguy or a cis guy. I prefer to just be perceived as a decent, evolved man. The rest I just really don't care about, one way or another. I'd rather be perceived as who I am, rather than what I am.

I hope that makes sense.

~Theo~