I was married in '92 to a bio-male. We dated for over 6 years before we got married, but the one thing he refused to do was live together.
Big mistake. He was a momma's boy and after doing ALL the housework for two years I had enough. There is more I was unhappy about, I will not list them.
I swore for years I would never get married. I was so eager to get out of the marriage I forgot to request I could resume using my maiden name. Filing the legal request, and all of the time and expense of changing my name back - on everything, driver's license, ss card, etc. - was a pain in the arse.
I swore left right up and down I would never do it again. Besides, I think a relationship takes more commitment when you are not legally obligated.
But here I am now, two + years later and I am considering it, heck I even asked him to marry me. I LOVE living with chefhmboyrd. I am in no rush, and we can't be legally married in TN anyways. TN would be last on that policy, for sure, since legal marriage (according to the state) is a union between a male and a female in front of a priest. I have already been married once before god, and it failed. So I won't do that again.
We have a domestic partnership, notarized per his employer's policies, so I am on his health insurance and such. I would like to file for marriage in Massachusetts, but we haven't found the time or resources for that yet. We were both born there, so it seems fitting, and I feel if same-sex marriage is ever recognized federally, our MA union would hold.
My divorce left me with the opinion that marriage is a legal union between two people, sort of like a corporation, a contract binding the two. I do believe in commitment /marriage ceremonies and what they stand for, look up "marry" in the dictionary. However, I feel if two people take legal steps to form a union, they should be recognized by the law and not be invalidated because the union was between two parties of the same gender.
I step down from the soapbox. Carry on, my fellow love bunnies.
|