Butch Femme Planet - View Single Post - Important things I learned from past relationships

Rockinonahigh · 10-08-2012, 11:46 AM

Afue years ago I was in a relationship with someone I really thought knew as we had ran in the same circles for years.First it started off as a working /friendship thing..I know sounds corney but that is what it was.The first two years were all I ever wanted to have..untill one day I saw something that made me do a double take.I wasnt shure what I herd or saw was really what was there so I ignored it,then it happened again,and again.I understand not jumping to conclusions or over analiseing things but when it came to compramiseing my core values by jusy being silent it became a stick in my craw bad.I did voice my thoughts in private with her but it only got worse.I hung in things but over and over it became worse in time till it only took a look or touch or deed to shut me away finaly to walk out on it all.No joke I lost the relationship by my own choseing only to end up loseing the work I had chosen for my life work with anamals(horses)..I sold my own personal horses to keep them safe from harm a long way from hear.Yes,she paid her own price way deeper than mine over time.This broke me in ways I never knew till I started therapy a fue months ago.The things that have come out in the sessions surprise even me,I lost the ablity to trust someone back in my life..I put a wall up of steel to protect me,im only now realiseing how high the wall is or how far it will come down.

10-08-2012, 11:46 AM	#116
Rockinonahigh Senior Member How Do You Identify?: stone butch Preferred Pronoun?: makes no diffrence,I know who I am. Relationship Status: single,maybe looking if the right person comes along. Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: shreveport,Louisiana Posts: 4,907 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,682 Thanked 14,937 Times in 3,936 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	Afue years ago I was in a relationship with someone I really thought knew as we had ran in the same circles for years.First it started off as a working /friendship thing..I know sounds corney but that is what it was.The first two years were all I ever wanted to have..untill one day I saw something that made me do a double take.I wasnt shure what I herd or saw was really what was there so I ignored it,then it happened again,and again.I understand not jumping to conclusions or over analiseing things but when it came to compramiseing my core values by jusy being silent it became a stick in my craw bad.I did voice my thoughts in private with her but it only got worse.I hung in things but over and over it became worse in time till it only took a look or touch or deed to shut me away finaly to walk out on it all.No joke I lost the relationship by my own choseing only to end up loseing the work I had chosen for my life work with anamals(horses)..I sold my own personal horses to keep them safe from harm a long way from hear.Yes,she paid her own price way deeper than mine over time.This broke me in ways I never knew till I started therapy a fue months ago.The things that have come out in the sessions surprise even me,I lost the ablity to trust someone back in my life..I put a wall up of steel to protect me,im only now realiseing how high the wall is or how far it will come down.