[girl_dee]

For years i was in the Big Sister program. Most of the girls were POC, poor, throwaway girls. Young, sometimes pregnant, sometimes pregnant with their own fathers/stepfathers babies. You wanna talk about some girls who feel hopeless?

Many times they joined me in Christmas at my Grandmothers because they had no where to go. i'd take as many as i could fit in my car. i had to be the shero, feed my own ego yaknow, only now i wonder if it made things worse for them.

i am glad we have POC in my family because i imagine it was strange enough walking into the Cajun Christmas madness at my Mamere's. After a little while they would relax but that had to be scary! Quite an experience that i hope they look back on and smile.

i hafta tell you that it only made me hate society more because i then had to return them to the girls home, i felt like a total prick. For one day they were treated well, my family always had gifts and my Mamere always had extras because she never knew who i would be bringing with me.

Then to go back to the home, that sucked.

i hope that our weekends and holidays made them feel less hopeless. i tried to expose them to what life could be like for them. That they were not hopeless. If all girls have to use as role models is what they see on TV, that's a sad case indeed.