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fiercegrrl · 03-20-2010, 03:21 PM

i've had such a long and rough week. so many tears. i just can't get them to stop. granted some of the tears have come from people doing amazing things to help me. i keep finding out about fundraisers in the works to benefit me. sometimes i feel guilty about all that though.

i finally reached the anger. the anger that i'm so young and so sick. i should be out with my friends. i should be looking cute scoping out the single butches who have emerged from winter hibernation. i should be making art and finding shows for it. i should be hating my job still. i should be laughing. and playing in my garden.

but i'm not. and i can't change that. or i could but i will die. maybe not tomorrow but sometime soon. and i'm not ready for that. so i have to spend the next 21 weeks fighting and feeling like hell.

i hope when i wake up tomorrow i feel better. i feel like such a burden to anyone i cry to right now..

03-20-2010, 03:21 PM	#1625
fiercegrrl In Memory Of How Do You Identify?: fierce femme grrl Preferred Pronoun?: beautiful, pumpkin, princess, sweet pea, babygirl Relationship Status: i don't think it's in the stars for me. Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: washington DC Posts: 133 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 34 Thanked 292 Times in 83 Posts Rep Power: 2486279	i've had such a long and rough week. so many tears. i just can't get them to stop. granted some of the tears have come from people doing amazing things to help me. i keep finding out about fundraisers in the works to benefit me. sometimes i feel guilty about all that though. i finally reached the anger. the anger that i'm so young and so sick. i should be out with my friends. i should be looking cute scoping out the single butches who have emerged from winter hibernation. i should be making art and finding shows for it. i should be hating my job still. i should be laughing. and playing in my garden. but i'm not. and i can't change that. or i could but i will die. maybe not tomorrow but sometime soon. and i'm not ready for that. so i have to spend the next 21 weeks fighting and feeling like hell. i hope when i wake up tomorrow i feel better. i feel like such a burden to anyone i cry to right now.. __________________ "and you can use my skin. to bury secret sins."