[Hominid]

I want someone who says "yes". In wanting that, I realized I have to do that as well. Anxiety, being a stodgy old stick in the mud ... get in the way.

I deserve someone going the extra mile for ME - I'm trying really hard to remember that, rather than chasing and wooing (which is admittedly fun). But I'd like to be chased, too - or at least I deserve someone making extra effort and extending kindness and feedback. I need to be wooed also. That's been very hard to admit.

I also have to admit that I'm NOT okay being alone. Or I'm too okay. But there are things I just don't do for myself, or care enough to do. There IS a hole, and as non-pc as that is, it also leaves me space for someone in my life. Note: there's not a hole in ME, just in my life. There is also a huge part of me, the best part of me, not in use when not in a relationship. I find many my age don't leave room after they work so hard to be self-sufficient. I am not completely self sufficient. I want someone who is invested enough to make sure I take my pills. Maybe makes me lunch for work. Again, not exactly PC or modern or the way things are done, but it's me and I'm not going to fight me anymore. I'm okay being alone, I have my routine, I'm not in a panic. But there are things in my life that require a partner for me to enjoy, and I'm not going to deny that fact any more.