Quote:
Originally Posted by DapperButch
Kelt, I am struggling a bit with understanding what you are saying. Are you saying that your experience in the locker room is worse than in regular bathrooms? I wonder if you are just noticed it more because since you were looking around the locker rooms (to assess the spaces), you grazed over people's faces and typically you avoid looking at people in the bathroom?
To be direct, I personally would never do the pool thing just so that I didn't have to deal with the whole shower/locker room thing. I would suspect that locker rooms would be worse for butches for two reasons:
1) women are probably even more conscious of their environment because they are getting undressed
2) the amount of time I had to spend in that space would be longer than in a public restroom which just means my discomfort would last even longer. I suspect it would become intolerable.
However, I would bet that yes, if you went the same time every day people would get used to you and also you will learn to do whatever it is you already do psychologically to get through public bathroom experiences. Perhaps it won't be as bad as you think?
Good luck.
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Dapper, you hit both points exactly. When I was in the locker rooms the women who were undressed had a more pointed reaction to my presence. Yes, significantly more than the restrooms. Point two is probably what's been holding me back from my original start date a few months ago. Combined with the fact that I myself would have to be visible (hell, I don't even let my doctor see me), I'm not really sure how I'm going to pull this off.
I have been trying to figure out someway to get in and out without having to use that space while still being able to do a weight workout and a water session in the same visit.
I have postponed too long and I want to be able to get in a good 12 week run before January when everything will get all clogged up. I was then going to take January and February as a period for maintaining my gains from the fall and assess at that point whether or not I need to do another 12 – 16 week run at that time.
So far, I think I'm just going to have to tough it out. Part of why I am writing all of this in here is to hold myself accountable, so that I won't chicken out again. I hate that it has to be like this. Just when I think I've got it all figured out how to move around in this world I run into another brick wall. It is tiring after 50 years.
Thank you for being able to articulate that succinctly.