[Orema]

Originally Posted by Gemme

I was going to say something but then Collette said this below.

See, now that's probably along the likes of what I would have said.

I've worked directly with the public all over the country, North to East to South to West, from big and inner city to out in the boondocks folks, since I was 15 and have had some really and truly rude and really and truly offensive and intrusive comments said to and about me.

I get that this falls into that category for you and Besame and am not saying that is not a legit feeling. I'm saying that that's really not as bad as it could have been, in my experience. Sure, tactless and maybe a little rude. Not as rude as an attempt of employment blackmail in order to get me to go out with someone, but still pretty tactless. It's all relative. I've experienced much worse, so for me, it's not a big deal. For you, it is. I get that and respect your feelings and the right to express mine as well.

Agree to disagree?

For the record, I can trigger at names. If someone knows my name and how I want to be addressed and they choose to use another name, for whatever reason, it irks me. If it's done often, I will go as far as to eliminate them from my life. Especially if it's someone in our community. Sometimes our chosen names and ways to be addressed are not necessarily what is found on our birth certificates and when someone refuses to address another as they see themselves and want to be addressed, I find that to be a very cutting form of disrespect and I don't have time or room for that in my life. So, if Besame's customer had purposefully addressed her as Gemme during the exchange, knowing that she is Besame, then I would have felt more strongly about it.

*shrug*

We all have our stuff and those who deal directly with the public have to develop thicker skin because of folks who may be abrasive, whether by design or not.

Agree to disagree—otherwise we will go in circles. I've made my points and you've made yours.

All the best.