Quote:
Originally Posted by AtLastHome
Part of me disagrees with this (but, I certainly get the big difference between loving someone). For me, forgiveness is linked to my spiritual balance. Therefore, keeping any of the negative energy that could keep me from letting go of ugly bitterness which hurts me internally (this part has nothing to do with the other person), then it best for me to let go of that energy. That is not empty to me and might be freeing in ways that are helpful.
I guess the main thing for me is about not carrying around anything that just continues to impact with my own growth. That is when I have felt that I continue to have the negative that my abuser or someone that treated me unfairly had over me. Hanging its ugly head still. I want to look someone in the eyes and say you have no effect over me anymore, period!
I don't know, so much of the "static" in life now is just not worth my dealing with anymore. A gift of aging! A gift of having many tough things happen that I just can't allow to overtake me because I know the consequences to myself are far too high.
The main thin with forgiveness for me is the realization that is has nothing to do with rendering someone else free of of their abusive or unfair behavior. It has everything to do with my living my life more positively.
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Good point. Maybe it would have been better to say that unless I love a person I don't care enough to hold bitterness or to need to forgive.
Do you think that it is important to look someone in the eye and tell them they have no hold anymore? This is problematic for me, because the person who abused me is dead.
I am trying to understand and get past my anger for the people who placed me in that vulnerable position and those who knew what was going on and did nothing to help me. I have reached the point where I am just profoundly sad rather than angry.