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Old 12-18-2009, 01:45 AM   #32
WILDCAT
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Originally Posted by WolfyOne View Post
If the word is used pertaining to ones self and you feel good about it, great. I have always thought it vulgar. Growing up in Chicago and having 5 brothers, I heard it spit out of their mouths more ways than I can count. Ignorant is all I can say about a few of my brothers. Some grew up and learned and some never grew up.

Communication is a big part of what's missed in some threads. Once one person takes a sentence or two out of context from the OP's way of thinking, others also tend to jump on the band wagon. I know, I've been guilty of it myself. There are threads many won't go into out of fear.....fear of either being rejected or humiliated. We all have our own opinions and it's ok. It's not ok to jump all over anyone in a thread. The language you use to present yourself is reflected upon you. I want others to always feel comfy here, so I'll do my best to watch how I use my words. We can agree to disagree as long as what we say doesn't come across as flippant.
Wow, this was sad to me. I'm sorry you went through this experience WolfyOne, with your siblings. I can't even imagine.

I always thought the "c" word was vulgar sounding too. It was like the worst thing you could say about a woman. It our area it is still not used - except for my one friend's family! All of the girls there say it. (Think like "Kitty from Gunsmoke", using the highest level of profanity! And ALL quick tempered redheads! FUN!! Now, I am a bit of a redhead, not being "redist" here, Mm-K?)

There were three sisters and ONE brother growing up in our household. IF my brother would have EVER used "any" word like that to/at/for us, there would have been a hole out one of the house walls replicating his exact dimensions.

Places like this with public writing, of course I try to be considerate. Isn't it just common courtesy? Sometimes I am shocked by what I read, AND I also have knee-jerked with the band wagon - that has normally been when someone was not just confused, or not showing they now understand or even care, but actually being downright rude and provocative - seemingly with intent. (WHICH has often kind of proved the point for the "knee-jerk" in the first place and follow up responses. Instigating, so to speak. Target words used with mal-intention.)

But, we are going to make mistakes. It's how we learn and grow! (I know, I always say this kind of stuff!) And everyone is at a different place of personal growth and understanding. I've said this before too - that's just the reality of it all. There are many kind and helpful folks here though.

Some rude ones are "joykill" for me though, I'll admit. The spirit and intention of a brand new thread can be brought down SO QUICKLY. I would get all excited to see something of interest to me - next thing I knew there is someone posting antagonistically somehow. It is hurtful and seems senseless to me. But, "humor" to someone else. Hatred sometimes? Perhaps some of this does make sense to some, well clearly it does - as wars break out for folks taking sides. We usually see these things on what we know are the "hot topics". (And then there's the nasty breakups of course...)

Yes, we also see repeatedly that folks state, "this is why I stay on the fluff and fun threads". I have often considered that myself.

The wars are generally for two different reasons though. Sticking up for someone they know or share the same sentiment(s), OR because someone felt someone was jumped on too harshly. Sometimes in the heat of battle we can't even keep from [distinguishing] that too clearly...



We should be able to write anywhere here without fear. IF someone rips on me publicly in a thread, or writes something "anti" any person, group, culture, etc... folks can and will speak up. That is community. That's not all a bad thing.

The trolls kill me. I finally accepted that this is done on purpose (yeah, it was a true shocker and heart breaker), and now can see the pattern at times. We need to be careful with that here I believe - and not turn on each other when we are in fact being set up to do so. (That's NOT the same thing at all where there is a good debate topic up for discussion.)

Generally, once I am done with someone though... I am "done". Their loss! (I do embrace efforts however to clear up things - for the genuine at heart. I'm a softy that way!) I see there are others like this too.




*There are no easy answers. It IS just good that discussions are taking place like this - especially on a new site. Thanks for that!! (I think I got a little too general and broad here. Oops. Emotional "PMS" disclaimer time! Afraid to submit this now... I know, it's boring... but, I hate to expose my thoughts, I just can't help myself though!)

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