Butch Femme Planet - View Single Post - Reclaiming Androgyny & The Text Book Definition

Toph · 08-10-2012, 10:44 AM

Alex;
you are right, i have had a long hiatus. fact is i was quite ill but am back for more now.

i really appreciate your million times thank you!

i did not mean to leave this thread unattended for so long but it happened and today, filled with rain and gray skies, i found myself reading all the posts and responses a few times over.

it is comforting to know that even some of the most butchly butchies and femmes of all maintenance groups agree and have voiced their opinion/s.

that being said, i would like to share a recent experience

i went for a coffee not long ago i sat outside just staring at the day. a good looking older gentleman approached me and we started talking. it was 30 minutes into our conversation that he realized i am not a bio-male. he thought i was a young man. When he apologized with chuckles he said "Holy shit you look just like a guy" i replied with "Holy shit you sound just like a girl" we laughed and talked and have met for coffee 3 times since.

i have facial hair, a gauté, i have had it since i was about 11. my mother, devoutly Italian, would put hot wax (melted on the stove) on my face and tear away my hair. it was painful and it always resulted in cystic acne. i understood why she did it, i was relentlessly teased and made fun of for either my hair or the result of its disappearance. fact is though, i never cared about my facial hair or my genderfucked appearance, still don't. i am as i like to say, the best of both worlds, love me or leave me.

through recent testing, it has been discovered that i have male pattern hair growth, an extra rib (or a missing rib) also known as Adams Rib, that i have higher than normal testosterone levels, which explains why i have had about 13 periods in all my 47 years. but does this explain my androgyny?

when i shave my gauté i look like i am either a young dude or a superiorly butch chick, but my mannerisms never change. i embrace my female i embrace my male and i embrace my ability to confuse the tunnel visioned world with their ideas and idealism of what either gender should encompass.

but what i do not embrace, is the painfully inaccurate definitions that our own community (whether online or in real time) have now decided belong in our 'glossary of gay terms'. it is a simple case of opening a dictionary.

we are what we are nothing can change that, not chemicals or operations, we still live in our minds where no one can violate or control us, where no one can enter or even understand our mental processes.

i agree with so many of you that it is so much of our own attitudes, our own acceptances and how we live day to day that defines who/what we are.

08-10-2012, 10:44 AM	#31
Toph Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Butch as fuck Relationship Status: alone until i heal Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: S W Ontario Posts: 34 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 24 Thanked 124 Times in 26 Posts Rep Power: 977870	Alex; you are right, i have had a long hiatus. fact is i was quite ill but am back for more now. i really appreciate your million times thank you! i did not mean to leave this thread unattended for so long but it happened and today, filled with rain and gray skies, i found myself reading all the posts and responses a few times over. it is comforting to know that even some of the most butchly butchies and femmes of all maintenance groups agree and have voiced their opinion/s. that being said, i would like to share a recent experience i went for a coffee not long ago i sat outside just staring at the day. a good looking older gentleman approached me and we started talking. it was 30 minutes into our conversation that he realized i am not a bio-male. he thought i was a young man. When he apologized with chuckles he said "Holy shit you look just like a guy" i replied with "Holy shit you sound just like a girl" we laughed and talked and have met for coffee 3 times since. i have facial hair, a gauté, i have had it since i was about 11. my mother, devoutly Italian, would put hot wax (melted on the stove) on my face and tear away my hair. it was painful and it always resulted in cystic acne. i understood why she did it, i was relentlessly teased and made fun of for either my hair or the result of its disappearance. fact is though, i never cared about my facial hair or my genderfucked appearance, still don't. i am as i like to say, the best of both worlds, love me or leave me. through recent testing, it has been discovered that i have male pattern hair growth, an extra rib (or a missing rib) also known as Adams Rib, that i have higher than normal testosterone levels, which explains why i have had about 13 periods in all my 47 years. but does this explain my androgyny? when i shave my gauté i look like i am either a young dude or a superiorly butch chick, but my mannerisms never change. i embrace my female i embrace my male and i embrace my ability to confuse the tunnel visioned world with their ideas and idealism of what either gender should encompass. but what i do not embrace, is the painfully inaccurate definitions that our own community (whether online or in real time) have now decided belong in our 'glossary of gay terms'. it is a simple case of opening a dictionary. we are what we are nothing can change that, not chemicals or operations, we still live in our minds where no one can violate or control us, where no one can enter or even understand our mental processes. i agree with so many of you that it is so much of our own attitudes, our own acceptances and how we live day to day that defines who/what we are.