[Gemme]

Originally Posted by Blade

What is maturity to you?
When do you know you are mature?
Does it come in stages?
Life stages, ages, events, or just come with time?
Relationship maturity?
Parenting, partnering, social maturity?

Maturity, to me, is not only knowing what the right thing to do is but doing it, even if it hurts.

When you do those things that are right and don't spend the rest of your life being miserable about it.

I believe it comes in waves. Sometimes the tides correspond with relevant and appropriate life experiences and sometimes they come quietly, when we're not aware. I also believe a person's maturity can fluctuate daily, whether due to social situations, hormones, or general asshattery.

Relationship maturity is not only thinking of yourself but of your partner and also of the relationship as a separate but connected entity all on its own and doing things that are good for the relationship, even if they conflict with what may be good or best for one or both of you.

I have known VERY few people who were ready for parenthood. Parenthood brings loads of gifts with it: responsibility, tears, laughter, maturity, insight, joy, and the ability to look outside of oneself for more than a nanosecond. Those who are good parents learn from these gifts. Those who aren't, don't.

Social maturity is a mixed bag for me. There are those who are very mature in just about every area of their lives and then they go out with friends and get blotto and do extremely stupid and immature things. In social situations, I notice that it's very easy to fluctuate from one level of maturity to the complete opposite very quickly. Even when alcohol is not a factor, I've seen this. Mob mentality for stupidity, I guess.

Designated drivers (being one or making sure you have one in place before you drink) would be a good example of social maturity. Not acting inappropriately.....like being a loud jerk at a small movie showing or laughing at a funeral (though I know there are those who have nervous laughter in certain social situations) or being a jerk to someone you asked to dance and they said no.