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Originally Posted by gayla
I understand the legal stuff, I really do. Married to a teacher for a long time, etc. etc. so I totally get it.
I read that the child has a gender neutral name so I don't think the teacher has "changed" the child's name. I'm not sure if the teacher has changed pronouns or if the OP did that simple out of respect.
I think there are ways to be inclusive in a classroom environment without the risks. Yes, there are guidelines, but there is also quite a bit of freedom within each classroom. Things like mixing up the lines not on gender, etc. Just the fact that the teacher is at all aware gender issues like this even exist is going to give this student, and all of them really, an advantage.
And maybe, when any of these children get to the next grade level and with a new teacher they may say, "Ms. X didn't make us line up as boys and girls, we just got to line up as people."
I also have to say that I think the level of fear that we experience over doing something "wrong" often keeps very simple things from changing for the good. I would really hate to see her stop doing things that empower all the children in her classroom out of fear that how she interacts with one child may get her in "trouble".
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I don't want to make Softness' daughter afraid of building an empowering environment for children.
Gayla, you are right there are ways to build inclusivity without opening oneself up to potential trouble (for teacher and future teachers who may not *get* it).
However, if major adjustments are being made without the parents and staff of a school being made aware (this can include social worker, guidance, and administration), it can be a potential issue.
It is possible to be gender neutral in many ways when designing activities and approaching student's; however, if it is getting into serious long term decisions then the school needs to be informed.
And, I think SuperFemme makes a really valuable contribution in that it will not be fair for one teacher to be accepting of this child and then to be levelled by their next year teacher who refuses to acknowledge any aspect of that child's internal sense of themselves.