11-09-2009, 07:29 PM
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#23
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paphigleo
Bent...
Because you put your experience out there I would like to ask if you feel you get more or less 'flack' for your genderqueer alignment than you did when ID'ing as "just Butch'?
Has it been a difficult decision to remain transitionless, or was it more of an emotional transition and self acceptance?
~pickin your brain
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Living a life of obvious "otherness" invites flack, and I'm going to guess I don't need to expound on that with this crowd. But is it more or less? I think it's probably about the same. There are still those same people who can't accept that which they don't understand, and those who believe embracing one's masculine nature = misogyny or self hate.
The truth about choosing not to medically or socially transition is that sometimes I read stories like these here, or see the "progress" photos and feel a kind of envy. I'm not overcome by jealousy, but rather a pang of "what if..." I sometimes envy those who can move about in public and be addressed by pronouns that feel comfortable to them, or who can try on a suit jacket and have it hang just right. Small things, I know, but these are just what immediately come to mind.
Frankly, top surgery remains a constant item on my wish list - a change I could make that would help push my internal/external selves just that much more into alignment. I think it would help me clear another hurdle of self-acceptance.
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