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Originally Posted by Nat
What are your thoughts on forgiveness? What does forgiveness mean to you? What does it feel like to you? Do you have methods or rituals of forgiveness? Do you feel there are times when forgiveness is not an option? Do you forgive frequently or rarely? Do you forgive yourself? Do you seek forgiveness for things you regret? Any other thoughts on forgiveness?
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What a timely thread! This is the season of forgiveness for Jews. Last Saturday we all packed into a tiny sanctuary and beat our chests and said the prayers taking repsonsibility for all the things we have done over the past year. Jews don't believe that G-d can forgive you for a wrong done to another human being. The process of forgiving another human being is called teshuvah. It means repentance. It also means turning and returning. So Jews go through the process of shedding this life and on Yom Kippur are "dead" and waiting to be reborn fresh for the new year and be g'mar hatimah tovah or sealed for good in the book of life. There are all sorts of rules that govern teshuvah during the Yamim Nora'im.
The process starts in the month of Elul preceding the holidays. The first holiday is Selichot which means sorry in Hebrew. You come to synagogue late and say a lot of prayers to prepare yourself for the month of introspection.
Jews do not believe that every wrong must be forgiven or that it is even advisable in some cases. There is an excellent book by Simon Wisenthal called the Sunflower. It is about forgiveness and brings up some really challenging questions. I encourage anyone interested in forgiveness to read it.
Forgiveness feels good to me sometimes and sometimes not. It all depends on the intention behind it. On Yom Kippur a congregant gave a drash (teaching) on forgiveness and asked everyone around her what they thought. She got some really interesting answers. One was that forgiveness is a manipulative act only for the person who has wronged. I don't agree with that. Interestingly enough this came from a teenager! Maybe it is a developmental thing? To reach an understanding of it.
As always Nat a very interesting thread.
Here is a question...is it necessary to believe in G-d to want to or seek forgiveness? I ask this because it was brought up as the notion of a punitive G-d is all that motivates humans to seek forgiveness. I don't believe this. Just curious.