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Hollylane · 01-28-2012, 02:27 AM

So I took this trip. No, not the kind I did last year, with the peyote, the desert, and the bald guy in a tutu. It was an actual trip. Down to San Diego, and that was where I had the most notable experience of my life. Right there among the sweaty brown bodies, buried beer bottles, slimy seaweed, and with sand in my crack because I forgot the $5 towel I bought from the gift shop on the corner down near Mission Beach. Or was it Mission Bay? I don’t know it was one of those tourist places and there was some water and people on roller blades and then there was the guy that nearly ran me down with his rented beach comber while wearing flip-flops and no underwear under his ridiculously short tropical pastel shorts, but I digress.

So again, down in San Diego, near a body of water, I ran into Lola. Lola was the catalyst to life changing events. Lola was standing there in her front yard with the pink flamingo and wearing a bright green sarong, while I was frantically attempting to pick my ass crack free of sand at the sidewalk shower, and she said “honey, can I help you with that? I got a 20ft hose with your name on it”. I looked up in surprise and relief and said, “Hell yes, I can’t walk another step without chafing my cheeks!”

So, Lola, she smiles and grabs the long green garden hose and drags it out onto the sidewalk, and it was at that moment that it occurred to me that my plane ticket was for Alaska. I guess that explains why I was standing on the sidewalk near a body of water in my underpants and thinking that it was unseasonably warm for Anchorage at this time of year. Doesn’t it?

01-28-2012, 02:27 AM	#79
Hollylane Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: . Preferred Pronoun?: . Relationship Status: . Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: . Posts: 11,495 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 34,694 Thanked 26,373 Times in 5,877 Posts Rep Power: 21474860	The story to nowhere.... So I took this trip. No, not the kind I did last year, with the peyote, the desert, and the bald guy in a tutu. It was an actual trip. Down to San Diego, and that was where I had the most notable experience of my life. Right there among the sweaty brown bodies, buried beer bottles, slimy seaweed, and with sand in my crack because I forgot the $5 towel I bought from the gift shop on the corner down near Mission Beach. Or was it Mission Bay? I don’t know it was one of those tourist places and there was some water and people on roller blades and then there was the guy that nearly ran me down with his rented beach comber while wearing flip-flops and no underwear under his ridiculously short tropical pastel shorts, but I digress. So again, down in San Diego, near a body of water, I ran into Lola. Lola was the catalyst to life changing events. Lola was standing there in her front yard with the pink flamingo and wearing a bright green sarong, while I was frantically attempting to pick my ass crack free of sand at the sidewalk shower, and she said “honey, can I help you with that? I got a 20ft hose with your name on it”. I looked up in surprise and relief and said, “Hell yes, I can’t walk another step without chafing my cheeks!” So, Lola, she smiles and grabs the long green garden hose and drags it out onto the sidewalk, and it was at that moment that it occurred to me that my plane ticket was for Alaska. I guess that explains why I was standing on the sidewalk near a body of water in my underpants and thinking that it was unseasonably warm for Anchorage at this time of year. Doesn’t it?