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Old 03-14-2013, 10:42 AM   #14
Daktari
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sun View Post
Excellent points. Perhaps I should have used the term "sensitive" with no qualifier. As for the line into emotional abuse, a partner who is sensitive should know at what point a comment is going to hurt or offend. If two people have formed an intimate bond, understanding the emotional sensitivity of the person that they have bonded with is important to the health of the relationship.

I agree, comments made in honesty should always be respectful. A good tip for those of us who are single and or dating, listen to how the person who you are getting to know delivers information not just to you but to others in their life. Listen to what they find amusing, how they relate to people that they care about and how they like to communicate. Pay attention to how they handle feedback at work, within a family structure, or in a classroom.

Can they process feedback and integrate it into something useful or are they always offended? Do they rise to a challenge or do they paint themselves as the victim when something goes wrong?

Do they flare up in anger? Do they shut down? Do they remain calm in a stressful situation?

Some of these clues will tell us how they may communicate with us if we are to get involved.

Another thought, as part of the "getting to know each other" process, talk about communication. Be direct about how you communicate and what you need in that realm.
I would ask who quantifies 'sensitive'.

I would also ask, respectfully, that you speak from a 'me' and 'I' place rather than a 'those of us who are' or 'you' or 'we' place.


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