I think I worded mine completly wrong I appologize.
Over the weekend, I went to a Butch-Femme Social and came to the conclusion, that you are who you are. It's something I've always known and felt, just never put into words or expressed. Its okay to label yourself whatever you want, butch, femme, soft, hard, black, white, purple, etc., but as soon as someone else tries to smack a label on you then its wrong.
I dont know why my generation has such a problem with accepting or labeling themselves, maybe it's the idea that as soon as they label themselves it will open a flood gate to others labeling them too?