[Lady Pamela]

~ Into YOUR Bed ~

My alarm wakes me…
As I sit in the dark, staring at the clock…
Wondering how much longer this is going to linger.
I stare at myself in the mirror…
Wondering where I went wrong.
Wondering what I can’t give you.
Wondering why you always stray.
I feel my body naked in the shower.
I feel every curve, every part of my woman hood.
Wondering why this body wasn’t good enough for you.
Wondering why you found more pleasure with a man.
I weigh myself on the scale, and sure I don’t like what I see…
But I’ve learned to love the body I am in.
But she, she’s doesn’t have an ounce of fat on her, does she?
I pull my boots on; throw my leather jacket over my shoulders…
And wrap my legs around a motorcycle.
Proud of myself and my bike…
I wonder why what I have to offer isn’t good enough.
I work long hours, straight weeks sometimes.
My paychecks are great and she loves spending them.
But that doesn’t matter to her.
I stay sober and keep my head on straight.
As I watch her, my lover, run to that man.
That man with a drink at hand.
When I come home, I hear of how great he is.
How I should give him a chance, let him into our bed.
I listen as she speaks his words, and tells me how much of an asshole I’ve become.
Little does she know what she’s done.
I choke on the tears in the back of my throat.
And I hide behind my image.
I am terrified to let it show that she killed me.
My worst nightmare came true when I saw him laying there with you.
As I lower my eyes to the end table, I saw your ring sitting there.
The ring I gave you when I gave you my heart.
Legs and arms wrapped around him, and your hands lay across his chest.
As you both sleep peacefully.
I was past the point of being angry.
I just simply walked out.
And made a vow to myself to never go back.

~JRL