Butches Cruel Joke?? *The Change*

Strappie · 08-07-2011, 07:56 PM

The tears at the drop of a hat, the sweats (not just at night mind you) The mood swings god I feel like I'm losing my mind..... Menopause

I mean growing up finding myself as a "female identified Butch" was in it self a hard thing to grow into. Walking into a women's bathroom and being told "sir you are in the wrong bathroom", I was mortified as a young adult to hear that and it still happens to me on a wkly basis. I'm better equipped to handle those words now at my age. But Menopause, god help me!

Lets not forget how I as a Butch tried to say the words Menstrual Cycle it just wouldn't come out of this mouth so I came up with my own word for it the "devil" The things that little thing does to a Butch every month is painstakingly hard to accept at a young age, hell even now. It's as if it's been a cruel joke for us Butches, Ftm's and anyone else that does not identify as femme.

I have been putting off going to the Doctor for a very long time and well I know I have to swallow my pride and go. Because if I don't I may just lose my friends, family and possibly my job because of my emotions. Ok it's really not that bad but holy cats I can't stop crying.. lol I love my friends dearly and they know I'm going through this but I don't think they understand what it's "really" doing to me as far as my masculinity.

Do any other Butches think it's a cruel joke?

The mind games it plays on a butch, I can't even describe or put into words the mind games it plays.

jelli · 08-07-2011, 08:07 PM

Did you see the thread that I started:

http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/foru...ead.php?t=3524

The_Lady_Snow · 08-07-2011, 08:12 PM

That damn menopause thing isn't just a *femme* thing Strappie, it affects all of us who are women bodied and it's crazy and hard to go through and the damn hot flashes!!! ARGH! jelli's thread has some great tips for everyone going through this!!!

BUY A FAN!!!

Strappie · 08-07-2011, 08:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jelli

Did you see the thread that I started:

http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/foru...ead.php?t=3524

I did Jelli,

I guess what I am trying to get across is that Butches go through menopause differently than most. Maybe it is just me? I do think we are on a different level as far as what it does to us masculine folks mentally more than what menopause is or does on a daily basis for women in general.

Do you agree or am I way off here?

Daywalker · 08-07-2011, 08:20 PM

For me GTFU it isn't a Gender thing, it's something that connects a Gender to
my mind...which is what makes me feels displaced. Because I don't
use my physical being in determining my Gender.

Good lawd I hope that made sense.

Strappie · 08-07-2011, 08:24 PM

Mentally it it screws with me. I am butch I am masculine yet I have to go through this the same way as a g/f or a partner. And to hear those words say after you tell someone you can't sleep or you cry at the drop of a hat and they say... Oh you are going through menopause... uggghhh that's hard to hear!

It's a mental game being played... it's as if I have started puberty all over again in a butches body.

jelli · 08-07-2011, 08:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Strappie

Mentally it it screws with me. I am butch I am masculine yet I have to go through this the same way as a g/f or a partner. And to hear those words say after you tell someone you can't sleep or you cry at the drop of a hat and they say... Oh you are going through menopause... uggghhh that's hard to hear!

It's a mental game being played... it's as if I have started puberty all over again in a butches body.

Is it a mind game to you because you feel as if once again your body has betrayed you? Do you feel as if nobody gets it(that unless you are masculine you wouldn't understand what masculine minded people experience)?

***cross posting****

Originally Posted by Corkey View Post
I am a secure human, so I know this too shall pass and has nothing to do with how I am perceived.
*****************

This was a perfect sentence to me.

jelli · 08-07-2011, 08:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Strappie

I did Jelli,

I guess what I am trying to get across is that Butches go through menopause differently than most. Maybe it is just me? I do think we are on a different level as far as what it does to us masculine folks mentally more than what menopause is or does on a daily basis for women in general.

Do you agree or am I way off here?

My own belief is that "masculine folks" may be on a more psychological level, but physically is there much difference?

That is part of what the guys have been talking about over in the other thread. I am so thankful for anyone speaking up.

My Cruel who by the was her whole screen name is Cruel Joke. Anyhow, I would never assume the way I enter, go through, curse menopause is going to be anywhere near what man-o-pause may be for her. I do believe knowing what I have been through, as well as knowing my partner, allows me some insight on how better to help with the transition.

Make sense?

Strappie · 08-07-2011, 08:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jelli

My own belief is that "masculine folks" may be on a more psychological level, but physically is there much difference?

That is part of what the guys have been talking about over in the other thread. I am so thankful for anyone speaking up.

My Cruel who by the was her whole screen name is Cruel Joke. Anyhow, I would never assume the way I enter, go through, curse menopause is going to be anywhere near what man-o-pause may be for her. I do believe knowing what I have been through, as well as knowing my partner, allows me some insight on how better to help with the transition.

Make sense?

Physically... I say yes... we all go through it basically the same...

Mentally... Hell NO

jelli · 08-07-2011, 08:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Strappie

Physically... I say yes... we all go through it basically the same...

Mentally... Hell NO

That's what I said Strap. I absolutely know ya'll go through it psychologically in worse ways. I wish it was easier. i wish for all those that it is not easier that they may find some piece of mind, people around that can find empathy, and if they have a current love that that lover can wrap all the love and support they can muster around their partner.

I have ALWAYS told Cruel, "You are strong for me always. On the days when you are not at your strongest let me love you better/stronger."

Scorp · 08-15-2011, 12:34 PM

Hey Strappie,

I feel your pain buddy. I'm actually going through peri-menopause and speaking openly about my situation here.

So you don't feel bad posting in here, I'll share my story which is a little more complicated.

I have poly cystic ovaries which started in my mid 30’s. I’ll be 46 in a few months. They also found about 6 years ago that I have endometriosis so I’m tripled whammied. I would get "the devil" (as you put it) off and on and then didn’t get one for 3 or 4 years. I thought it was awesome not getting one and loved every minute of it! Little did I know it’s dangerous for me to NOT get one at my age.

I ‘ve been seeing an Endocrinologist every 6 months for the past 10 years for my PCOS. I already have a natural high volume of testosterone in my body and moreso my hormones are already fucked up because of all of the above. A long time ago they put me on birth control (imagine me on birth control, how funny is that!) to have my evil monthly friend regulated. Bottom line at that time I was told that I was too young to NOT be having a visit from Auntie Flo which put me at high risk for uterine cancer.

My understanding is that my maternal grandmother went through the change of life at 36 years old. Because of that, there was a good chance that I was having an early change too, so I had a blood test done to see if that was the case (that was about 3 years ago and it came back negative). I recently had another test done 2 months ago and again it came back negative.

My body just hasn’t felt right as the years go on and I notice more and more things. Needless to say, I’m not going through the change right now. I have hot flashes and my mood swings can be occasionally bad. A lot of it also has to do with the progesterone I have to take the first 10 days of each month in order to get Auntie Flo and it sucks! I’m already a hot blooded ginzo and this adds to it. Within 8 days of taking it, I feel the rage throughout my body more so than the norm. At one point and time Julie would say “Here we go, it’s roid rage time”. When I feel myself get like this, I usually give her a heads up and apologize ahead of time and ask that she bear with me if I’m a loose cannon. Thankfully she’s understanding and so supporting. I’m blessed with having her I tell you that (more ways than one).

In any case, you’re not alone with stuff, remember, we were born women and this is how it goes. You have support here so don’t feel uncomfy talking about it in here. We know you’re that big ole strappin’ butch

So just hang in there buddy and make that appointment to get checked. It will put you in the clear of things and also for piece of mind.

Keep us posted and good luck!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Strappie

The tears at the drop of a hat, the sweats (not just at night mind you) The mood swings god I feel like I'm losing my mind..... Menopause

I mean growing up finding myself as a "female identified Butch" was in it self a hard thing to grow into. Walking into a women's bathroom and being told "sir you are in the wrong bathroom", I was mortified as a young adult to hear that and it still happens to me on a wkly basis. I'm better equipped to handle those words now at my age. But Menopause, god help me!

Lets not forget how I as a Butch tried to say the words Menstrual Cycle it just wouldn't come out of this mouth so I came up with my own word for it the "devil" The things that little thing does to a Butch every month is painstakingly hard to accept at a young age, hell even now. It's as if it's been a cruel joke for us Butches, Ftm's and anyone else that does not identify as femme.

I have been putting off going to the Doctor for a very long time and well I know I have to swallow my pride and go. Because if I don't I may just lose my friends, family and possibly my job because of my emotions. Ok it's really not that bad but holy cats I can't stop crying.. lol I love my friends dearly and they know I'm going through this but I don't think they understand what it's "really" doing to me as far as my masculinity.

Do any other Butches think it's a cruel joke?

The mind games it plays on a butch, I can't even describe or put into words the mind games it plays.

08-07-2011, 07:56 PM	#1
Strappie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Butch Preferred Pronoun?: I know who I am... Doesn't matter Relationship Status: It's a new day.... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Mpls, MN Posts: 3,283 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,813 Thanked 4,946 Times in 1,350 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Butches Cruel Joke?? The Change The tears at the drop of a hat, the sweats (not just at night mind you) The mood swings god I feel like I'm losing my mind..... Menopause I mean growing up finding myself as a "female identified Butch" was in it self a hard thing to grow into. Walking into a women's bathroom and being told "sir you are in the wrong bathroom", I was mortified as a young adult to hear that and it still happens to me on a wkly basis. I'm better equipped to handle those words now at my age. But Menopause, god help me! Lets not forget how I as a Butch tried to say the words Menstrual Cycle it just wouldn't come out of this mouth so I came up with my own word for it the "devil" The things that little thing does to a Butch every month is painstakingly hard to accept at a young age, hell even now. It's as if it's been a cruel joke for us Butches, Ftm's and anyone else that does not identify as femme. I have been putting off going to the Doctor for a very long time and well I know I have to swallow my pride and go. Because if I don't I may just lose my friends, family and possibly my job because of my emotions. Ok it's really not that bad but holy cats I can't stop crying.. lol I love my friends dearly and they know I'm going through this but I don't think they understand what it's "really" doing to me as far as my masculinity. Do any other Butches think it's a cruel joke? The mind games it plays on a butch, I can't even describe or put into words the mind games it plays.

08-07-2011, 08:07 PM	#2
jelli Member How Do You Identify?: Femmilicious Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: And you said I wasn’t your type!!! Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: SC Posts: 836 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,758 Thanked 1,079 Times in 377 Posts Rep Power: 16588547	Did you see the thread that I started: http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/foru...ead.php?t=3524 __________________ “Sometimes we make the right decision; sometimes we make the decision right.” “Every conflict is a lesson in self-discovery for both of us. Sometimes it's only hindsight that makes it worth it. For you, I would do it all again.“

08-07-2011, 08:12 PM	#3
The_Lady_Snow MILLION $$$ PUSSY How Do You Identify?: Kinky, Raw, Perverted, Uber Queer Alpha Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Iconic Ms. Relationship Status: Keeper of 3, only one has the map to my freckles Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: La Reina del Sur Posts: 22,488 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 32,231 Thanked 80,119 Times in 15,678 Posts Rep Power: 21474873	That damn menopause thing isn't just a femme thing Strappie, it affects all of us who are women bodied and it's crazy and hard to go through and the damn hot flashes!!! ARGH! jelli's thread has some great tips for everyone going through this!!! BUY A FAN!!! __________________ "If you’re going to play these dirty games of ours, then you might as well indulge completely. It’s all about turning back into an animal and that’s the beauty of it. Place your guilt on the sidewalk and take a blow torch to it (guilt is usually worthless anyway). Be perverted, be filthy, do things that mannered people shouldn’t do. If you’re going to be gross then go for it and don’t wimp out."---Master Aiden

08-07-2011, 08:20 PM	#5
Daywalker Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Hippy Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: * Posts: 3,750 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 6,499 Thanked 11,917 Times in 2,700 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	For me GTFU it isn't a Gender thing, it's something that connects a Gender to my mind...which is what makes me feels displaced. Because I don't use my physical being in determining my Gender. Good lawd I hope that made sense. __________________ www.SirDaywalker.com

08-07-2011, 08:24 PM	#6
Strappie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Butch Preferred Pronoun?: I know who I am... Doesn't matter Relationship Status: It's a new day.... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Mpls, MN Posts: 3,283 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,813 Thanked 4,946 Times in 1,350 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Mentally it it screws with me. I am butch I am masculine yet I have to go through this the same way as a g/f or a partner. And to hear those words say after you tell someone you can't sleep or you cry at the drop of a hat and they say... Oh you are going through menopause... uggghhh that's hard to hear! It's a mental game being played... it's as if I have started puberty all over again in a butches body.