From the heart of a Tiger

[Gentle Tiger]

Ever write stuff, revisit it and the words/message hits you right between the eyes? I did. So I thought I'd share them here.

My disclaimer: I don't consider myself a writer or poet by any stretch of the imagination!

Invisibility

You see good where others do not
You see potential when others see impossibility
You see solutions where others only see problems
Yet you do not see me

You see light when others see darkness
You see beauty where others see disgust
You see life where others see decomposition
Yet you do not see me

You see so much
Yet you do not see me

[Gentle Tiger]

A War cry of Tenacity

Too many dreams yet to be realized
Too many desires yet to be known
Too many failures yet to be attempted
Too many successes yet to be achieved

I cannot settle
I will not settle for less

Too many battles to hold back the tears
Too many fights to endure the moment
Too many struggles to survive the abuse
Too many wars to keep my life

I cannot settle
I will not settle for less

Too many times being viewed as a freak
Too many times not being seen at all
Too many time being misunderstood
Too many times going without

I cannot settle
I will not settle for less

Too much love held in restraint
Too much passion imprisoned within
Too much kindness waiting to be served
Too much strength waiting to be lent

I cannot settle
I will not settle for less

Though the loneliness eats at me like cancer
and the pain consumes me like the burning bush

Though loneliness plagues me like ten thousand boils
and depression torments me like a restless ghost

Though heartbreak guard my soul like a mother her cub
and despair encapsulates me like a prison its inmate

Though confusion fits me like the comfort of an old shoe
And heartache accompanies me like a loyal friend

This I vow to remember
I cannot settle
I will not settle for less

[Gentle Tiger]

Why do you run?

Why do you run from that which you seek?
Why do you run from that which you crave?
Why do you run from that which you need?
Why do you Run?


Why do you cry for that which refuses you?
Why do you mourn for that which you despises you?
Why do you ache for that which cannot embrace you?
Why do you run?

Why do you run from that which can empower you?
Why do you run from that which can caress you?
Why do you run from that which can calm you?
Why do you run?

Why do you run from that which can comfort you?
Why do you run from that which can nurture you?
Why do you run from that which can befriend you?
Why do you run?


Why...do you...run?

[Gentle Tiger]

Why Do You Run - The Answer

I run because I am afraid
that I will be consumed again
that I will be burned again
that I will be a circus freak again

I am afraid

I run because I do not wish to see
a dream fall apart yet again in front of me
a dream trampled under foot like pigs in the mud
a dream laughed at like a mocking crowd

I do not wish to see

I run because I do not wish to feel
my heart ripped and shreaded as it has been before
my heart dropped to the ground as if it were some vial disease
my heart thrown away as if it were some rotten johnny mop

I do not wish to feel

I run because...
I feel I must

[Gentle Tiger]

A Transman's Cry


Why do you first ask about my anatomy?
Why do you first ask about my plans on surgery?
Why do you first ask about my transition?

Why can't you get to know me?

Why can't you ask what I like to do?
Why can't you ask what's my biggest fear?
Why can't you ask what's my favorite movie?

Why can't you get to know me?

Why do you question me like I am a freak?
Why do you interview me like I am an alien?
Why do you enquire of me as if I am a new species?

Why can't you get to know me?

Would you ask another of their vagina on the first conversation?
Would you ask the size of their nipples after just finding out there name?
Would you ask about clitoral stimulation after just seeing their screen name?

Why can't you get to know me?

I am more than a dick that is not naturally attached.
I am more than a vagina I wish I didn't have.
I am more than breasts that don't belong on me.

I am so much more.


I am a person who possesses a soul and lives in a body.
I am a person who wants to know love.
I am a person who feels more than I care to at times.
I am a spirit that transcends time and space


I am more than a body part.

[Gentle Tiger]

afraid of what will happen next
heart pounding like a semi-automatic
but looking into the eyes of her spirit I see safety

I want to open up
I want to show her what no one has been allowed to see
I want to take her inside where all have been forbidden to enter


What is happening?


I stand in front of her
her eyes telling me she is not afraid
her spirit gently envelops me, reassuring me she is strong and she is ready


I unbutton my shirt and I lower my trousers
she immediately sees past that which is skin and bones
she sees the bandages and all the scars


A storm is raging.


I want to run. I want to hide
yet I want to stand and let her read my Braille
I am conflicted


Slowly I remove the bandages which cover my being; no words are spoken
cautiously I guide her hand over my scars, communicating spirit to spirit how they were gotten
petrified yet yearning, aching for her to see, to understand


Thunder rolls. Lightning crashes.


She caresses me and kisses me as I show her the intricate scars over my heart
She applies healing balm to my open sores with her eyes
She gently whispers, "I am still here. I am not afraid."

And she speaks healing to my soul
As I stand before her allowing her to see my naked, wounded soul
I realize for the first time what has happened, what is happening.


There is a gentle and quiet rain.

I am being seen.
I am being cleansed.
I am free.
I am being healed.
I am whole.