How do you know when you are getting older? - Page 3

Blade · 02-25-2011, 09:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Corkey

No you just get liquored up at home and stay there, cause you forgot where the keys are.

and you no longer know where the safe bars are

MysticOceansFL · 02-25-2011, 09:57 PM

When your lifting your glasses to read the smaller print and you can actually read it better that way!!! LOL

Kobi · 02-25-2011, 10:18 PM

How do I know when I am getting older?

~when I need a magnifying glass to read the newsprint and food labels,

~when I realize store clerks have no idea how to make change unless the register tells them and even then they can get it wrong,

~when I remember that Boone's Farm Apple Wine used to be the rage,

~when all kids look alike to me,

~when I go to say something and promptly forget what it was,

~when I cant find my keys cuz they spent the night in the lock,

~when I cruise the newspaper for the early bird specials,

~when colonoscopies and cholesterol pills are dinner conversation,

~when you go to matinee movies cuz you don't drive at night,

~when you ask for the senior discount everywhere,

~when the folks at the pharmacy know me by name

~ when the tv and movie stars of my generation are advertising boniva and activia.

Kobi · 02-25-2011, 10:32 PM

~ when designated driver refers to the person who isnt bothered by the glare of headlights at night

~btw, cigs here are $8.50 a pack

Corkey · 02-25-2011, 10:34 PM

Designated driver is the one who still has their license.

Spirit Dancer · 02-25-2011, 10:35 PM

Even our labels remind us of our age
one a day over 50, centrum silver.

Where once we never worried about fiber
now we cannot live without it.

Spirit Dancer · 02-25-2011, 10:40 PM

Yesterday when my child said
you mean you were born when the first man went to the moon?
Man mommy you are old as moondust

Diva · 02-25-2011, 10:57 PM

.....when You feel You must say ~ when asked Your age ~ You're forty~eighteen.....

Soft*Silver · 02-25-2011, 11:16 PM

things you own are shown on ebay as vintage items

the need to shave your legs decreases as your hair begins to disappear

once believed to be a lesbian because you wore sensible shoes (feminist era), now no one questions why you wear sensible shoes

dressed to the nines now means jeans without an elastic waist

WILDCAT · 02-25-2011, 11:17 PM

... I read some of the posts here, and I feel like I need ulcer medication.

Jesse · 02-25-2011, 11:28 PM

I was looking at some online ones and came across these:

You and your teeth no longer sleep together.

You get to work before you discover you forgot to get dressed.

You had to get rid of your dog... he kept trying to drag you to the yard to bury you.

Watching paint dry has a certain fascination.

You discover the meaning of life, but forgot to write it down.

Gráinne · 02-26-2011, 12:38 AM

When the Rolling Stones and the Who sound quaint compared to what my kids listen to.

When my kids ask if I had TV when I was a girl.

I walk into a room and forget what I was doing there.

Coming up on my 30th high school reunion!

The joke is true: when I get on the floor, I wonder what else I can do down there.

When I bought one of those personal fans for women of a certain time of life.

When I became a great-aunt. My great-aunt was a tiny little old lady.

Corkey · 02-26-2011, 12:55 AM

Last one standing is a youngster!

Jesse · 02-26-2011, 01:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Corkey

Last one standing is a youngster!

Can we have jello puddin instead?

Corkey · 02-26-2011, 01:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jesse

Can we have jello puddin instead?

Sugar freeeeeee, no teeth required.

amiyesiam · 02-26-2011, 01:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Corkey

Sugar freeeeeee, no teeth required.

will you please stop talking about no teeth
you have teeth
you know you can eat pudding even if you have teeth

edited to add: the no teeth thing is giving me the willies

Jesse · 02-26-2011, 01:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Corkey

Sugar freeeeeee, no teeth required.

Good! We can toss em all in the dishwasher for a good scrubbin!

Corkey · 02-26-2011, 01:26 AM

Reverting to childhood!

amiyesiam · 02-26-2011, 01:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Corkey

Reverting to childhood!

You said you were a good child
With teeth

storyofmylife · 02-26-2011, 01:38 AM

When I sneeze and .......... lol!
Thank goodness for pantyliners! Lol

02-25-2011, 09:57 PM	#42
MysticOceansFL Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Butch, Preferred Pronoun?: People call me by my nic name. Relationship Status: Not Single, Not Desperate. Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Florida Posts: 3,833 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,645 Thanked 4,033 Times in 1,720 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	When your lifting your glasses to read the smaller print and you can actually read it better that way!!! LOL __________________ Faith is not belief without proof, but trust without reservation. It is said, " Some lives are linked across time..... Connected by an ancient calling that echoes through the ages "......

02-25-2011, 10:34 PM	#45
Corkey Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Human Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: Very Married Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Where I want to be Posts: 8,155 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 47,491 Thanked 29,268 Times in 6,637 Posts Rep Power: 21474859	Designated driver is the one who still has their license. __________________ "Many proposals have been made to us to adopt your laws, your religion, your manners and your customs. We would be better pleased with beholding the good effects of these doctrines in your own practices, than with hearing you talk about them". ~Old Tassel, Chief of the Tsalagi (Cherokee)

02-25-2011, 10:35 PM	#46
Spirit Dancer Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Complex but Tender Preferred Pronoun?: ~Ma`am~ Relationship Status: Shotgun Rider Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Following the red road Posts: 4,519 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,304 Thanked 12,904 Times in 3,466 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	Even our labels remind us of our age one a day over 50, centrum silver. Where once we never worried about fiber now we cannot live without it. __________________ “For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.” Judy Garland

02-25-2011, 10:40 PM	#47
Spirit Dancer Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Complex but Tender Preferred Pronoun?: ~Ma`am~ Relationship Status: Shotgun Rider Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Following the red road Posts: 4,519 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,304 Thanked 12,904 Times in 3,466 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	Yesterday when my child said you mean you were born when the first man went to the moon? Man mommy you are old as moondust __________________ “For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.” Judy Garland

02-25-2011, 11:16 PM	#49
SoftSilver Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: rose cottage Posts: 5,594 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8,948 Thanked 15,897 Times in 4,064 Posts Rep Power*: 21474857	things you own are shown on ebay as vintage items the need to shave your legs decreases as your hair begins to disappear once believed to be a lesbian because you wore sensible shoes (feminist era), now no one questions why you wear sensible shoes dressed to the nines now means jeans without an elastic waist __________________ Pole bachit, a lis chuye. The field sees, the forest hears

02-25-2011, 10:18 PM	#43
Kobi Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Biological female. Lesbian. Relationship Status: Happy Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Hanging out in the Atlantic. Posts: 9,234 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,840 Thanked 34,617 Times in 7,640 Posts Rep Power: 21474860	How do I know when I am getting older? ~when I need a magnifying glass to read the newsprint and food labels, ~when I realize store clerks have no idea how to make change unless the register tells them and even then they can get it wrong, ~when I remember that Boone's Farm Apple Wine used to be the rage, ~when all kids look alike to me, ~when I go to say something and promptly forget what it was, ~when I cant find my keys cuz they spent the night in the lock, ~when I cruise the newspaper for the early bird specials, ~when colonoscopies and cholesterol pills are dinner conversation, ~when you go to matinee movies cuz you don't drive at night, ~when you ask for the senior discount everywhere, ~when the folks at the pharmacy know me by name ~ when the tv and movie stars of my generation are advertising boniva and activia.

02-25-2011, 10:32 PM	#44
Kobi Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Biological female. Lesbian. Relationship Status: Happy Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Hanging out in the Atlantic. Posts: 9,234 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,840 Thanked 34,617 Times in 7,640 Posts Rep Power: 21474860	~ when designated driver refers to the person who isnt bothered by the glare of headlights at night ~btw, cigs here are $8.50 a pack

02-25-2011, 10:57 PM	#48
Diva Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Diva Preferred Pronoun?: Diva Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Chez Diva Posts: 11,879 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,263 Thanked 17,175 Times in 5,239 Posts Rep Power: 0	*.....when You feel You must say ~ when asked Your age ~ You're forty~eighteen.....*

02-25-2011, 11:17 PM	#50
WILDCAT Member How Do You Identify?: Very PROUD BUTCH LESBIAN! Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: PA Posts: 679 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 796 Thanked 551 Times in 238 Posts Rep Power: 761791	When... ... I read some of the posts here, and I feel like I need ulcer medication. __________________ *Do not give permanent reality to temporary things...

02-25-2011, 11:28 PM	#51
Jesse Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Transguy Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: single Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Central West Coast of Florida Posts: 5,204 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 34,866 Thanked 17,782 Times in 3,940 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	I was looking at some online ones and came across these: You and your teeth no longer sleep together. You get to work before you discover you forgot to get dressed. You had to get rid of your dog... he kept trying to drag you to the yard to bury you. Watching paint dry has a certain fascination. You discover the meaning of life, but forgot to write it down. __________________ “You’re so hard on yourself. Take a moment. Sit back. Marvel at your life: at the grief that softened you, at the heartache that widened you, at the suffering that strengthened you. Despite everything, you still grow. Be proud of this.”

02-26-2011, 12:38 AM	#52
Gráinne Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Neither, nada, out of the box Preferred Pronoun?: My name always works Relationship Status: Happy whatever happens Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: Little Rock Posts: 1,864 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,118 Thanked 7,386 Times in 1,457 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	When the Rolling Stones and the Who sound quaint compared to what my kids listen to. When my kids ask if I had TV when I was a girl. I walk into a room and forget what I was doing there. Coming up on my 30th high school reunion! The joke is true: when I get on the floor, I wonder what else I can do down there. When I bought one of those personal fans for women of a certain time of life. When I became a great-aunt. My great-aunt was a tiny little old lady. __________________ The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one. ~Erma Bombeck

02-26-2011, 12:55 AM	#53
Corkey Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Human Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: Very Married Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Where I want to be Posts: 8,155 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 47,491 Thanked 29,268 Times in 6,637 Posts Rep Power: 21474859	Last one standing is a youngster! __________________ "Many proposals have been made to us to adopt your laws, your religion, your manners and your customs. We would be better pleased with beholding the good effects of these doctrines in your own practices, than with hearing you talk about them". ~Old Tassel, Chief of the Tsalagi (Cherokee)

02-26-2011, 01:26 AM	#58
Corkey Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Human Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: Very Married Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Where I want to be Posts: 8,155 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 47,491 Thanked 29,268 Times in 6,637 Posts Rep Power: 21474859	Reverting to childhood! __________________ "Many proposals have been made to us to adopt your laws, your religion, your manners and your customs. We would be better pleased with beholding the good effects of these doctrines in your own practices, than with hearing you talk about them". ~Old Tassel, Chief of the Tsalagi (Cherokee)

02-26-2011, 01:38 AM	#60
storyofmylife Member How Do You Identify?: silly femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: Truly,Madly,Deeply Engaged ♥♡ Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: garden state Posts: 636 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,057 Thanked 808 Times in 350 Posts Rep Power: 2559043	When I sneeze and .......... lol! Thank goodness for pantyliners! Lol