The Mythical *Pass* for Differently-Abled People

[SuperFemme]

Originally Posted by urs

Oh yeah, I meant to say something about this because it keeps getting buried in other concepts (which are also really important, but what you said above is specifically what this thread is about).

I totally agree - I know I said in my first post that I give everybody passes, DA or not, but having thought about it - under that definition, they aren't passes.

While we seem to be talking all around the subject, but not specifically addressing it, I actually think that most of us are in agreement that being differently abled should not entitle anyone to a pass - i.e. being DA shouldn't absolve them from taking responsibility for their own behaviour (but only according to each person's capacity).

I think the crux of the issue is that there is a whole bunch of societal baggage that informs people what an appropriate response to DA ought to be.

A lot of it is well meaning, but in the end there is a huge grey area between giving a person compassion and understanding because of X, and not holding a person accountable because of X, and where A will see one, B sees the other.. . and it's not always clear-cut who is right.

I believe that this is where the conversation is falling down.

Thank you so much for this post. You completely understand what I wanted this thread to be about, and while it has been important to look at all views I worry that the intent has gotten lost.

So I am glad to see that it has not.

I in no way meant to imply that the level of empathy, compassion, and understanding that we treat others with should fall by the wayside. I am in no way saying that the moderators and admins do not give individual consideration on a case by case basis. That means that when there is any kind of issue involving a DA'd person they are going to go above and beyond to be aware of the issues specific to that DA'd person.

I think we all have personal attachments to this, and the lenses we are viewing it through are multiple.

I not only get that, I totally respect it.

I also want people to be aware that The Planet is committed to this community being accessible to differently abled people. That commitment includes going an extra mile (or ten) when dealing with issues that might come up. It means that behind the scenes, there are usually several attempts at solutions until the right one fits.

I understand that it this is a new and different thing within an online b/f community, and I would hope that people are able to have faith in what The Planet is all about, and have faith that doors aren't going to be slammed in your face here because you are differently abled and have a unique way of communicating.

I'd also like to stress that if you contact myself or the mods/admins and need help that it is confidential (outside of the aforementioned). If you are differently abled but choose to be private about it to the community at large, please know that if you choose to share that (say you need assistance or whatever) your information will always remain private.