Butch/Femme Insemination and Family Dynamics

Corkey · 05-12-2010, 03:49 PM

I think the silence is because it's something the two of you need to decide on, the rest of us have opinions, and aren't involved in your relationship, so it would be pointless to express our opinions.
You two are gonna have to figure this out.

Wishing you both good luck!

RadiantYearning · 05-12-2010, 04:08 PM

Congratulations to the two of you as you prepare to begin planning a family together. I have two children who were conceived via artificial insemination. Both of our experiences with insemination were very, very positive but that isn't the case for everyone. I'm very fortunate to be incredibly fertile, so my insemination was quick and easy. You will have many decisions to make in this journey and I'd be happy to share my experiences with you. Hopefully I can shed some light on things for you a little bit. Please feel free to message me on here and I will happily share my contact information.

As far as what the child will call tcbbutch ... I would agree with Corkey that this is something that the two of you will have to work out together. I'm assuming, though, that you're only looking for others to comment on their own personal situations to introduce you to some possibilities. In my situation, my then partner and I decided that we would allow the child to decide what to call her. In the end, I was mommy and she became "Mimi."

tcbbutch · 05-12-2010, 05:14 PM

Thanks ...I guess thats more what we are looking for not really what I will be called but how other couples have come to reach that decision. As you say it is a very personal thing.
So if anyone has anything they would like to share about how they made those decisions that would be great. Thanks again for any ideas or personal experiences with either the insemination process or the dynamics involved.

BoDy*ShOt · 05-12-2010, 05:59 PM

yay! more ButchFemme babies!!

my ex and i have an almost 3 yr old son via AI - i carried and she did a second parent adoption when he was 6 wks old (in san antonio - i can give yall the attorney we used - ADORE her!) we used the california cryobank for the goods and did complete medical route for the insemination (if yall are in Dallas i can give you the doctor/clinic we used as well!) our pregnancy journey took 5 inseminations w/ 3 donor changes....our "gettin pregnant" insemination would have been the last try - it took a toll financially, emotionally, and physically....

tcb - my ex didn't want to be called mommy (that's ME!) as it didn't fit her, like you feel...or daddy either...so we combined it and she's called maddy - and it fits her perfectly.

good luck on your journey...and feel free to ask me any questions!

tcbbutch · 05-12-2010, 11:05 PM

Thanks BodyShot for all the great info. The lawyer info will probably be most definitely something we will need. I live outside of Houston in the direction of San Antonio so that is great. I will PM you if that is easier and of course feel free to PM either of us.
We appreciate all the information and help we can get. Thanks for sharing ur story.

Gemme · 05-13-2010, 10:14 AM

Like Corkey said, it's a very personal thing to decide and, honestly, you may not have anything to do with the choice in the end. Babies...well, toddlers will assign you a name they feel comfortable calling you. It may be Papa or some derivative of your chosen or birth name or may be something completely off the wall.

No matter what, I wish you well on this journey.

Kobi · 05-13-2010, 10:38 AM

Did anyone else have a totally different idea before they read what this thread was about?

Ok getting my mind out of the gutter........good luck on this new journey in your lives.

05-12-2010, 03:49 PM	#1
Corkey Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Human Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: Very Married Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Where I want to be Posts: 8,155 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 47,491 Thanked 29,268 Times in 6,637 Posts Rep Power: 21474859	I think the silence is because it's something the two of you need to decide on, the rest of us have opinions, and aren't involved in your relationship, so it would be pointless to express our opinions. You two are gonna have to figure this out. Wishing you both good luck! __________________ "Many proposals have been made to us to adopt your laws, your religion, your manners and your customs. We would be better pleased with beholding the good effects of these doctrines in your own practices, than with hearing you talk about them". ~Old Tassel, Chief of the Tsalagi (Cherokee)

05-12-2010, 05:59 PM	#4
BoDyShOt Member How Do You Identify?: Queer. Femme. Preferred Pronoun?: girl ones Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Twin Cities Posts: 1,020 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,460 Thanked 2,096 Times in 532 Posts Rep Power*: 21474853	yay! more ButchFemme babies!! my ex and i have an almost 3 yr old son via AI - i carried and she did a second parent adoption when he was 6 wks old (in san antonio - i can give yall the attorney we used - ADORE her!) we used the california cryobank for the goods and did complete medical route for the insemination (if yall are in Dallas i can give you the doctor/clinic we used as well!) our pregnancy journey took 5 inseminations w/ 3 donor changes....our "gettin pregnant" insemination would have been the last try - it took a toll financially, emotionally, and physically.... tcb - my ex didn't want to be called mommy (that's ME!) as it didn't fit her, like you feel...or daddy either...so we combined it and she's called maddy - and it fits her perfectly. good luck on your journey...and feel free to ask me any questions! __________________ ...not your average betty.

05-13-2010, 10:14 AM	#6
Gemme Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Queer Stone Femme Girl of the Unicorn Variety Preferred Pronoun?: She, as in 'She's a GEM' Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: The roads are narrow here Posts: 36,631 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 182,498 Thanked 107,926 Times in 25,666 Posts Rep Power: 21474887	Like Corkey said, it's a very personal thing to decide and, honestly, you may not have anything to do with the choice in the end. Babies...well, toddlers will assign you a name they feel comfortable calling you. It may be Papa or some derivative of your chosen or birth name or may be something completely off the wall. No matter what, I wish you well on this journey. __________________ Gemme's Journal I'm misunderestimated.

05-13-2010, 10:38 AM	#7
Kobi Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Biological female. Lesbian. Relationship Status: Happy Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Hanging out in the Atlantic. Posts: 9,234 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,840 Thanked 34,617 Times in 7,640 Posts Rep Power: 21474860	Did anyone else have a totally different idea before they read what this thread was about? Ok getting my mind out of the gutter........good luck on this new journey in your lives. __________________

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05-12-2010, 04:08 PM	#2
RadiantYearning Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Girlie ones ... Relationship Status: Damsel, non-distressed, seeks knight in shining armour! Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Mt. Olympus Posts: 39 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 54 Thanked 146 Times in 27 Posts Rep Power: 1528401	Congratulations to the two of you as you prepare to begin planning a family together. I have two children who were conceived via artificial insemination. Both of our experiences with insemination were very, very positive but that isn't the case for everyone. I'm very fortunate to be incredibly fertile, so my insemination was quick and easy. You will have many decisions to make in this journey and I'd be happy to share my experiences with you. Hopefully I can shed some light on things for you a little bit. Please feel free to message me on here and I will happily share my contact information. As far as what the child will call tcbbutch ... I would agree with Corkey that this is something that the two of you will have to work out together. I'm assuming, though, that you're only looking for others to comment on their own personal situations to introduce you to some possibilities. In my situation, my then partner and I decided that we would allow the child to decide what to call her. In the end, I was mommy and she became "Mimi."

05-12-2010, 05:14 PM	#3
tcbbutch Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Stone Butch Preferred Pronoun?: Hy..Hym Relationship Status: Her Daddy Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Texas Posts: 11 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2 Thanked 31 Times in 5 Posts Rep Power: 247852	Thanks ...I guess thats more what we are looking for not really what I will be called but how other couples have come to reach that decision. As you say it is a very personal thing. So if anyone has anything they would like to share about how they made those decisions that would be great. Thanks again for any ideas or personal experiences with either the insemination process or the dynamics involved.

05-12-2010, 11:05 PM	#5
tcbbutch Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Stone Butch Preferred Pronoun?: Hy..Hym Relationship Status: Her Daddy Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Texas Posts: 11 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2 Thanked 31 Times in 5 Posts Rep Power: 247852	Thanks BodyShot for all the great info. The lawyer info will probably be most definitely something we will need. I live outside of Houston in the direction of San Antonio so that is great. I will PM you if that is easier and of course feel free to PM either of us. We appreciate all the information and help we can get. Thanks for sharing ur story.