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11-20-2016, 11:42 AM
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#1 |
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Member
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Having emerged from a divorce seven months ago (I have the dubious distinction of being probably THE FIRST same sex divorce in my state!), I have to say...as unattractive as this sounds, I have a definite fear of abandonment.
While I've begun dating again, my new relationship is a long distance one, which feels a bit safer to me- like a new relationship with training wheels attached. I know that my fears will ease eventually. This is part of being human...we all endure transitions in life that scar us, but those scars fade with time. |
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04-07-2017, 08:11 PM
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#2 | |
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Practically Lives Here
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04-07-2017, 08:20 PM
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#3 |
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Senior Member
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sitting over there ----->>>>> :) Preferred Pronoun?:
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I do not have any relationship fears. The reason is because I intend to stay single the rest of my life. I am not missing out on a thing. Seriously!
It may sound like a cop out to some ... maybe it is, I do not know. I do know I gave the issue considerable thought before I reached this iron-clad decision. What a freedom! 
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04-07-2017, 08:22 PM
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#4 | |
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Practically Lives Here
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04-07-2017, 09:39 PM
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#5 |
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Infamous Member
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she Relationship Status:
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wow, this is a good topic!I too have (r) PTSD....
my fears.. being left because I am frail. I have had a couple serious accidents, and some health problems that have stolen my physical strength. But I only want to be loved for who I am, and am not. This is my reality. sharing finances. I wont ever do that again. Infidelity is a former fear. It doesnt worry me any longer. I use to be possessive but I have since come to a conclusion that going beyond your relationship, if consensual, is not a deal breaker. My husband and I are in an open relationship. And if we ever find a third, we are open to that as well. I no longer need sole rights to my person. not being put first..letting another have a space that should be mine. I had a HORRIBLE experience with this and its probably the single most traumatic relationship issue I ever encountered. It will never happen to me again. Since then, I have asserted myself and made sure I was the chosen one, and if I wasnt, I moved on immediately. I think my fears were all addressed and resolved in this current relationship between me and my husband. I honestly didnt think I would ever get into another relationship. My track record wasnt very good and I was a wreck, physically and emotionally, when I met my husband. We started out as friends and he became my physical caretaker after my first surgery. He refused to let me stay by myself and slept on the couch while I healed. Not for long...his kindness, and compassion, his ability to love and soothe me, manifested such a love within me. Time and a good person, heals all wounds, and fears...
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Pole bachit, a lis chuye.
The field sees, the forest hears |
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04-08-2017, 01:09 AM
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#6 |
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Senior Member
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Seems like I'm in the same boat at several others here.
Have big time fear of abandonment issues. Sometimes my Partner must take measures to quell lashing out and panic. Thankfully, She has a strong Alpha personality.
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Insurrection is an art, and like all arts has its own laws. -----Leon Trotsky |
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04-08-2017, 03:30 AM
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#7 |
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Hearing her but not being enough to calm the storm left from time..
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| dating, hurt, insecurity, relationships, scars |
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