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Old 08-28-2010, 01:56 PM   #4
Soft*Silver
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1. Do you nurture yourself? If so, what are the ways you do so?
I do indeed nurture myself. My gardening is part of nurturing myself. It fills my soul. Horses also. And I am working on getting a horse back in my life! I take naps. I paint my nails and lotion myself silly. I enjoy a special coffee now and then. I take a walk with my old dog in the local parks. I call dear friends. I paint. So many ways....

2. Do you rely on your partner/family/friends to nurture you? well, I use to. And then I had a relationship where I was not nurtured let alone noticed at all. I was left alone in the relationship and scorned for even being present. It was devastating to me. To this day, when someone wants to date me and they show me the least bit of interest in the way or nurturing, I literally get ill and run in the opposite direction. I am trying to overcome this. But its so hard....I just dont want to love again and be so rejected like I was. I doubt anyone's sincerity when they say they care for me.I fight against myself to allow them to care for me but honestly, its like I am grinding my teeth and white knuckling it the whole time. Amazing the damage one relationship can do to a person. But...as I said, I am working on it....

3. Do you feel that you adequately learned how to nurture your self when you were growing up? I had to learn to self nurture because my parents were not nurturing at all. I never had a loving set of parents. I was taken care of. I just wasnt loved like a child needs to be loved. So, Ifound it amongst the animals. My dogs would lay beside me while I napped on the grass. The ponies would head bump me and I would hang on their necks while they ate grass in the front yard. Momma kitties adopted me as one of their own. I believe my love for animals came directly from me being a lonely child.

4. Do you feel any sort of discomfort about nurturing yourself? sometimes. Not often. But sometimes.

5. Do you think that this whole self nurturing thing is just new age stuff and not even something worth talking about? I dont remember my parents or my grandparents ever doing anything to nurture themselves. Ever. I dont know if its a class thing, an ethnic thing, etc. We were poor folks of immigrants. My family had to work hard, from sun up to sun down and had no money to spare. My family experienced the great depression and sacrificed so much just to survive. They would be mortified to know people of today spend almost $5 on flavored coffee drinks. Or bought scented oils to do aramotherapy. To them that would be rediculous. And shameful. But you need to realize their experience. People around them lost everything they had. When my parents died, they left us so much money it was unbelievable. Why? Because they hoarded it in case they needed it. And in case we ever needed it after they were gone. Maybe that was their idea of self nurturing....hmmmmm
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