What every Femme should know...

[Ebon]

It might be a good idea to let her cool off before calling or back or you might get hung up on again.

[BullDog]

Well lucky me, I never have to pay $30 for us to go to the movies because my femme is constantly getting free movie vouchers from her employer because she is a kick ass nurse.

My femme took me out for lunch just yesterday.

Yes I do take her out as well and I am a She.

p.s. she has never hung up on me

[betenoire]

What every Femme should know:

Measure twice cut once. This goes for countertops, neat fabric for throw pillows, and the jeans you need to hem.

How to parallel park. Because driving in circles for 30 minutes looking for a spot you can just pull in to is boring and bad for the environment.

How to brew tea the correct way. Just because it irritates me when you do it wrong.

How to hang up blinds, wall art, and the telephone.

When to call it quits and when to keep on trucking.

How to sneak microwave popcorn and bottled water into a movie matinee because that shit should NEVER cost $30.

And finally that you are worth so much more than some dime-store creepy staring insomniac stalker who won't call you on your shit.

[Julie]

What every Femme should know...

You do not need a butch to complete you.
You do not need an identifying butch (male or female) to validate that you are a Femme.
You can shave your head and still be Femme.
Femme is not about what you wear, but who you are inside.
You are beautiful and not because you are being told by someone... But because you believe it.

The day I have to depend on a Butch to make me feel good about myself... Is the day I have lost who I am.
I am beautiful, because I am Julie - Not because I am told by a butch.

You do not need someone to pay for your dates.
You are an independent woman.
You can change your own oil and if you cannot, you can bring it to the service station.

Dammit... I keep going back to the brushing the hair out of my eyes. Where is it?
If my butch has to keep reminding me how lucky he/hy/she is to have me... I will eventually think they are trying to convince themselves.

This whole thing (while it is sweet in theory) scares me. Not for me, but for the countless Femme's that believe their self worth comes from a being partnered with a Butch.

Julie

[The_Lady_Snow]

Is we have somewhere to go here on BFP...

>LINKY<

[Julie]

Let us not forget.

Being Femme means you honor and respect your Femme Sisters.

Being a Femme's Femme is more important than any Butch on this planet.

[The_Lady_Snow]

sit in your shiatsu massage chair reading food blogs and drinking cold brew

have a kitchen dance party

make jam at midnight, when it’s finally cooled down outside

spend the day napping and jerking off

read a good book straight through

try a new recipe

flirt with the fed ex man/woman like you’re in a harlequin

take a week off from facebook

wash your sheets and line dry them

listen to whatever you want, all day long

watch gilmore girls for hours, because you can

make your favorite dish. share it with yourself.

try on the clothes that make you feel pretty. prance accordingly.

wear your swim cover up as a nightgown

indulge your organizing neuroses

take a long shower

make your hair do funny things

write

remember that many people enjoy your company. being with yourself is no punishment.

[grenade]

Originally Posted by Julie

Let us not forget.

Being Femme means you honor and respect your Femme Sisters.

Being a Femme's Femme is more important than any Butch on this planet.

really?? I honor those who deserve honor. I respect those who respect me. Femme, butch, straight, purple.... I don't see the difference. Maybe I'm missing something.

[JistMe]

P. S. .... This is why I dont post. It was not meant to imply that 'femmes NEED a butch' or anything of the sort. But, it's cool. Gives everyone something to analyze and post on. Tear it up!

[GinaSofia]

Originally Posted by Julie

Let us not forget.

Being Femme means you honor and respect your Femme Sisters.

Being a Femme's Femme is more important than any Butch on this planet.

What?
I'm married before anything else. My spouse will always come before any friendship, femme or other. I didn't take vows with any of my friends to put them before all others & I wouldn't expect my friends to put me in higher regard than their SO's either.

[JustJo]

What every femme should know...

...who you are is just fine.

...it's perfectly okay to choose to be alone....in fact, sometimes that's the best choice....for awhile or forever.

...you get to make your own choices....and so do your friends, your family and your partner.

...it's perfectly okay to choose to be coupled....and it's your choice who you do that with.

...you do not need the approval of others to be who you are.

...and finally, you really don't have to pay a plumber $200 to replace the flapper in the toilet....it truly isn't that hard to do.

...you are more resourceful than you may think you are.

[grenade]

Nothing is absolute or applies to everyone. The sentiment behind this was sweet. Thanks for sharing.

[The_Lady_Snow]

Originally Posted by grenade

Nothing is absolute or applies to everyone. The sentiment behind this was sweet. Thanks for sharing.

The sentiment is sweet nonetheless as a Femme I *have* to speak up, lately there have been discussions in this forum about caution, care, duplicity, red flags. It's very easy for people to get swept up with romantic ideals, fantasies and realities get pushed aside..

I would rather educate my fellow community of Femme's of the things they ALREADY are, hearing them from a butch/guy/boi/boy shouldn't make them more valuable than what we see, feel, think and are...


Poetry like this is not the reality that happens to women, we're much more than fluff us Femme's so therefore I feel as a Femme that IS what we should know..

We are what we are because we make it so, NO ONE has control of that my loins don't control my destinies, fantasies, journey's Gender....

[Julie]

Originally Posted by The_Lady_Snow

The sentiment is sweet nonetheless as a Femme I *have* to speak up, lately there have been discussions in this forum about caution, care, duplicity, red flags. It's very easy for people to get swept up with romantic ideals, fantasies and realities get pushed aside..

I would rather educate my fellow community of Femme's of the things the ALREADY are, hearing them from a butch/guy/boi/boy shouldn't make them more valuable than what we see, feel, think and are...


Poetry like this is not the reality that happens to women, we're much more than fluff us Femme's so therefore I feel as a Femme that IS what we should know..

We are what we are because we make it so, NO ONE has control of that my loins don't control my destinies, fantasies, journey's Gender....

You are so right Snow...
And in part, this is what being FEMME is about.
We call out the bullshit and we take care of our Femme Sisters.
We make sure they are not swindled or taken advantage of.

And sometimes... We have to blow up the fairy tale, just to keep them safe.

Julie who is so proud and honored to call you Sister.

[Estella]

With all due respect to the original poster, there's something slightly repellent about a butch telling femmes what we should know. My mother told me what I should know ... the rest I figured out the hard way, or learned from other brilliant, brave, beautiful Femmes.

[Melissa]

Originally Posted by Julie

You are so right Snow...
And in part, this is what being FEMME is about.
We call out the bullshit and we take care of our Femme Sisters.
We make sure they are not swindled or taken advantage of.

And sometimes... We have to blow up the fairy tale, just to keep them safe.

Julie who is so proud and honored to call you Sister.

Jullie - I love love love this line "And sometimes... We have to blow up the fairy tale, just to keep them safe."

[grenade]

Originally Posted by The_Lady_Snow

The sentiment is sweet nonetheless as a Femme I *have* to speak up, lately there have been discussions in this forum about caution, care, duplicity, red flags. It's very easy for people to get swept up with romantic ideals, fantasies and realities get pushed aside..

I would rather educate my fellow community of Femme's of the things they ALREADY are, hearing them from a butch/guy/boi/boy shouldn't make them more valuable than what we see, feel, think and are...


Poetry like this is not the reality that happens to women, we're much more than fluff us Femme's so therefore I feel as a Femme that IS what we should know..

We are what we are because we make it so, NO ONE has control of that my loins don't control my destinies, fantasies, journey's Gender....

and you can not speak for all femmes any more than I can, or the original poster. A lot of femmes might read this and swoon. Are they wrong in feeling this type of adoration meets certain desires and needs they might have? It might be more accurate for a person to read this and say not me. I am not THAT femme.

[Dude]

speaking of needs

wanting someone is hot
needing someone is not

huge difference

[The_Lady_Snow]

Originally Posted by grenade

and you can not speak for all femmes any more than I can, or the original poster. A lot of femmes might read this and swoon. Are they wrong in feeling this type of adoration meets certain desires and needs they might have? It might be more accurate for a person to read this and say not me. I am not THAT femme.

Grenade, I did NOT say that anyone was wrong, I am putting it out there that Femme's have other options, that they DON'T need to validate who they are via a butch/guy/boy/boi.

The title of this thread is

"What EVERY Femme should know"


So therefore since I am Femme I decided to speak not for EVERY Femme but for ALL Femmes especially those of us who do not fall into the heteronormative/mysoginist traps of relationships....

So what EVERY Femme should know is:

She can be the one in charge and not have ANYONE remind her how much the fucking movies cost... I found that to be pretty fucking gross not romantic hence why I spoke up because as a Femme it's insulting...

[Julie]

Originally Posted by grenade

and you can not speak for all femmes any more than I can, or the original poster. A lot of femmes might read this and swoon. Are they wrong in feeling this type of adoration meets certain desires and needs they might have? It might be more accurate for a person to read this and say not me. I am not THAT femme.

I am responding... Though the question was posed to Snow.

No, they are not wrong for feeling this way. It does make me a bit sad for those Femme's out there, that get their self worth from being loved and adored by a butch and who feel worshiped by a $30 movie.

The title of this thread is "What every Femme should know..."

Personally... I am just sharing my personal wisdom, as are some of the other posters. My personal stuff. Just in case there are some femme's out there, who never experienced the other side. Self worth.

Julie