Stone--Personal Definitions

[StoneOne]

and tagging for later read
Thanks for sharing

[shiagirl]

Originally Posted by StoneOne

and tagging for later read
Thanks for sharing

Following Stone and tagging too for later reading.

[pynkkameleon]

*bumping* this thread so that it doesn't get covered with cobwebs and missed by anyone who might benefit from reading and/or participating within this topic. I think it has a lot of value and importance.

I know that I certainly have learned a lot.

[Dance-with-me]

Originally Posted by pynkkameleon

*bumping* this thread so that it doesn't get covered with cobwebs and missed by anyone who might benefit from reading and/or participating within this topic. I think it has a lot of value and importance.

I know that I certainly have learned a lot.

Thank you for bumping this! It's exactly what I presumed was here somewhere but hadn't yet looked for and found.

To be honest, I was always unsure of what people meant when they said "stone butch" and even more confused by "stone femme." But I find myself relating to the different descriptions very well.

Part of who I am as a femme is that I respond very strongly to a very masculine sexual energy -- just not in a biological man's body.

Part of my journey as a femme was coming to terms that when I'm sexual with someone, I'm sexual with that person's masculinity -- even if that person is herself not thinking of her body or sexuality as masculine (though I honestly prefer if he does). And I want my lovers to deeply desire that feminine counterpart from me. It has nothing to do with my lover's gender identity: I've had 100% woman-identified lovers who still had a very masculine sexuality. For example, a certain body part might be her clitoris 98% of the time to her, but when she's in bed, she thinks of it completely as her cock, and not just as a term she used as a turn-on in bed, but because that's where her head is. ::ahem::

Am I making any sense?

And to have someone talk about what I'm doing in a feminine/female way is a real turnoff to me. I do not "eat pussy" and to ask me to do so would stop me col - but I have sucked butch cock. I do not ever "fuck" someone else - but I have given some internal pressure that he enjoyed. I do not enjoy being fucked by a dildo - but I do enjoy that same action from another version of butch cock. I do not fondle breasts - but nipple stimulation is enjoyed very much by both men and women. it's not just language: It's MY head space that I need to be in, and the head space I prefer my lover to be in.

There are few boundaries that I have solely because a certain action or body part is (to me) feminizing, as long as it's something that still allows me to maintain a feminine sexual energy that's balancing with a masculine energy. But I also have zero problems respecting my lover's boundaries - but to me that has nothing at all to do with stone or not stone, to me that's what everyone should do for any lover. Some people just don't LIKE certain things, to the point of it being a real turn-off to even imply that they might occur, period. And if I can't respect my lover's boundaries, then I have no business being sexual with that person. So for me, a butch having boundaries or desires that are based on his needs and his body, including needing me to never do certain things that are feminizing to him, even if that means never touching him directly sexually, is NEVER a problem.

Sorry to ramble. I guess what I'm saying is, I realize now (like, past hour "now") that I could be considered a stone femme, using the definition that pertains to relating to my lover only in terms of masculine sexual energy.

[Bit]

Originally Posted by Dance-with-me

Am I making any sense?

Indeed! You make perfectly good sense to me.

[~ocean]

Am I making any sense?

I feel alot as u do. I consider myself a stonefemme , we r very similar, I also have a very strong submissive side as well. ^ 5 dance well put.

[pynkkameleon]

Originally Posted by Dance-with-me

Am I making any sense?

I think that you are making perfect sense. No rambling whatsoever. I too can relate to much of what you've said. Gotta love those "aha" moments. I know that I sure do

[sierragirrl]

I wanted to thank everyone who took the time to post in this thread.
I have enjoyed it and learned a few things.
Thanks again

[Heavenleahangel]

I have been reading through the previous posts and find that everyone has their own opinion (as it should be) as to what "stone" represents or "pillow princess" for that matter.
I personally, do not like labels to define or describe who I am. When I hear "stone" anything I have an understanding that person doesn't want to be "touched" in a feminizing or sexual manor. When I hear "pillow princess" I understand someone who doesn't actively participate in sexual activities. As far as "top", "bottom", "sideways" or any other adjective, I don't get into those, either. Whether it's inexperience on my part, or naivety, I'm not sure.
What I do consider to be important is when I am contemplating dating or partnering with someone, I take it upon myself to have "the talk" if my potential partner hasn't already. I take the time to get to know (point blank even) what that person expects and to explain what my expectations are. As we all know, "the dance" and all aspects of it can and should be deal breakers if both parties don't "match up". Its a clear issue of respect, and RESPECT is the most important thing in ANY relationship. Maybe I am the one who is outdated and maybe my way of thinking is why I am still single. But I don't need a label to define me.