top or dom/me, sub or bottom

[Loren_Q]

Yeah... not always easy to explain. Okay, the 101 view

Loosely speaking tops/dominants would drive whatever action would occur, bottoms/submissives follow (or receive).

But there are nuances.

If it's SM play, the top would wield the implement, the bottom receives it. In a power dynamic the dominant controls/has authority, the submissive is controlled.

However, I know sadistic tops who are sexually submissive. I know dominant masochists ("You'll hurt me this way").

And sex? It's whatever is comfortable for the individual.

If speaking in general terms, I tend to lump dominants, sadists (drivers) into "top" and submissives, masochists (receivers) into "bottom". If speaking in a leather or BDSM environment I use narrower terms: top/bottom for physical play and dominant/submissive for power dynamic. And then there's the whole Master/slave combination...

I do prefer to use dominant or dom and not domme, because dominant (like top) isn't gender specific and domme is a made up asb usenet thing.

That's my take.