Poly-friendly mingling/flirting thread

RockOn · 05-18-2014, 09:51 PM

I was researching books on poly relationships and this one kept popping up: The Ethical Slut

Do any of you recommend this book in a favorable way or give it a thumbs down for a NOOB like me?

Any additional suggestions will be appreciated. I'm trying to find a good starting place with something I am unfamiliar with.

Thanks.

candy_coated_bitch · 05-18-2014, 10:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RockOn

I was researching books on poly relationships and this one kept popping up: The Ethical Slut

Do any of you recommend this book in a favorable way or give it a thumbs down for a NOOB like me?

Any additional suggestions will be appreciated. I'm trying to find a good starting place with something I am unfamiliar with.

Thanks.

I'd definitely recommend The Ethical Slut. I think it's very accessible for someone new to polyamory, or for someone who is just curious. I haven't really read any other books about it, so I couldn't really say. I did a quick glance at what came up on Amazon and I didn't recognize even one other book I've heard other people talk about, let alone read myself.

There are as many ways to be poly as there are to be a Butch or a Femme. It's kinda just what works for you and your partner(s). That's probably a process if you've never tried it before. I know a lot of people in the kinky world who are poly and I can say I have seen many different ways of structuring (or not structuring) poly relationships. If you asked a hundred people what poly means you'd get a hundred different definitions, as they like to say.

For me personally--my partner identifies as poly and I don't and we had to do a LOT of negotiating until we could get to a place where we both felt we were getting what we needed. I think for us the most important part was to be able to figure out and name what each of our core needs was.

anaisninja · 05-18-2014, 10:45 PM

I second the endorsement for The Ethical Slut. I also recommend Opening Up by Tristan Taormino.

RockOn · 05-19-2014, 04:16 AM

candy _ coated _ bitch and anaisninja:

Thanks to both of you for your valuable replies.

Ms. Meander · 05-19-2014, 06:23 AM

Opening Up - A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships by Tristan Taormino
is an excellent resource!

JustLovelyJenn · 05-26-2014, 04:18 AM

*stops by to wave at people and skips back out*

canadianmusician · 05-27-2014, 12:20 AM

Queer, poly, kinky transguy here.

I agree that Opening Up is a wonderful book!

05-19-2014, 06:23 AM	#5
Ms. Meander Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Queer Femme Relationship Status: Ethical Nonmonogamist Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: The Mountains Posts: 1,520 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,706 Thanked 5,210 Times in 1,147 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Opening Up - A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships by Tristan Taormino is an excellent resource! __________________ My wish for you is that you continue. Continue to be who and how you are, to astonish a mean world with your acts of kindness. Continue to allow humor to lighten the burden of your tender heart. - Maya Angelou

05-26-2014, 04:18 AM	#6
JustLovelyJenn Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She/her Relationship Status: That's Need to Know Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Aberdeen, WA Posts: 4,478 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 12,464 Thanked 13,991 Times in 3,684 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	stops by to wave at people and skips back out __________________ --Jenn

05-27-2014, 12:20 AM	#7
canadianmusician Junior Member How Do You Identify?: FTM Preferred Pronoun?: Him/He/His Relationship Status: Poly & D/s Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: Vancouver Posts: 47 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 25 Thanked 63 Times in 29 Posts Rep Power: 430181	Queer, poly, kinky transguy here. I agree that Opening Up is a wonderful book! __________________ The only thing I learned from the tooth fairy is that I can sell my body parts for money.

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05-18-2014, 09:51 PM	#1
RockOn Senior Member How Do You Identify?: sitting over there ----->>>>> :) Preferred Pronoun?: .... Relationship Status: .... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: .... Posts: 3,522 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,081 Thanked 10,302 Times in 2,610 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	I was researching books on poly relationships and this one kept popping up: The Ethical Slut Do any of you recommend this book in a favorable way or give it a thumbs down for a NOOB like me? Any additional suggestions will be appreciated. I'm trying to find a good starting place with something I am unfamiliar with. Thanks.

05-18-2014, 10:45 PM	#3
anaisninja Member How Do You Identify?: . Preferred Pronoun?: . Relationship Status: . Join Date: Feb 2014 Location: . Posts: 117 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 167 Thanked 485 Times in 93 Posts Rep Power: 6064353	I second the endorsement for The Ethical Slut. I also recommend Opening Up by Tristan Taormino.

05-19-2014, 04:16 AM	#4
RockOn Senior Member How Do You Identify?: sitting over there ----->>>>> :) Preferred Pronoun?: .... Relationship Status: .... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: .... Posts: 3,522 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,081 Thanked 10,302 Times in 2,610 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	candy _ coated _ bitch and anaisninja: Thanks to both of you for your valuable replies.