T for Two and Two for T....

[Gemme]

Originally Posted by Words

It is a fantastic voyage but there are times - speaking of my personal experience here - when the voyage isn't quite so fantastic and I was curious as to whether or not I was alone in this.

I'll give you an example. I was prepared for the fact that in some respects, B's decision to go on T but not actually transition would somehow marginalize U/us even further than W/we were marginalized already. That, and the associated loneliness, I was prepared for. What I wasn't prepared for - and what, quite frankly, has taken me totally by surprise - is that even though B. still embraces Hys female self and is not actually transitioning, *I*, in most regards, relate to Hym as male. Not, in itself, a problem. Until I need my best friend, my female best friend, someone who, being a female herself, can understand what I'm going through. That 'someone' used to be B. And now it's not. Not because B. is no longer female but because *I* no longer relate to Hym as female and yes, that can, and does, sometimes make me feel lonely. (I'll give you a specific example. I have to undergo a test tomorrow that's pretty much focused on my 'girly bits'. It's a pretty high up there on the humilation kind of test and I'm not looking forward to it at all - truth is, I'm dreading it - but because it relates to my girly bits, I'm not comfortable talking about it with B.)

So...can anyone relate to this?

Words

I can sympathize with you, although I cannot directly or exactly relate or empathize, as my experience in a situation like this is limited. I would imagine it's a little bit like your best friend is on the other side of a glass wall. You see Hym but you cannot communicate nor receive the kind of communication back that you have been used to previously.

That didn't quite come out how it sounded in my head. Same glass wall, and you can see one another and you can hear Hym but Hy cannot hear you as you would like to be heard. There's that barrier between you, though you both can see through it.

I don't know if that's any better, but I think that I can understand, though not directly relate, to what you are feeling.

I wish you luck on your test tomorrow and may the process be as quick as possible.