Dykes And Lesbians To Watch Out For

*Anya* · 11-02-2012, 07:15 PM

I did this for so many years and I did not even risk getting thrown out of the service.

I really hated myself every time that I did it.

As a femme, everyone already assumed that I was straight and I had a ton of excuses as to why I let them believe that.

Underneath it all was probably just as simple as fear of rejection by telling the truth.

I recently posted in the Listening to each other thread that I had another opportunity for a moment of truth and this time, I just told it like it really was/is.

The VP that hired me at my new job asked me during a lunch with the two of us, about dating men. I hesitated just a beat and said, fuck it (to myself): "I don't date men, I date women".

I can't even begin to write how freeing that felt and how glad I am that I did that.

I will never use unambiguous words to describe my sexual orientation or who I date or who I love; ever again.

macele · 11-02-2012, 08:43 PM

anya, good for you. makes me proud that you are proud lol.

lusciouskiwi · 12-02-2012, 09:05 PM

One of my uncles (whom I do not like) called me a "fucking dyke" to which I said "thanks, it's the nicest thing you've said to me all day"

I'll think of some more positive stories and share later

CherylNYC · 12-02-2012, 10:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lusciouskiwi

One of my uncles (whom I do not like) called me a "fucking dyke" to which I said "thanks, it's the nicest thing you've said to me all day"

I'll think of some more positive stories and share later

Good one. My closest friend, (who has never been my gf), and I were walking somewhere in NYC when a horrible dooood found himself somehow inconvenienced by our presence. He called us "fucking dykes", too. Since we're both femmes, I suspect he meant it to be an insult, but hadn't thought the implications of what he was really saying all the way through.

We immediately put our arms around each other and my friend said, "You noticed!" with exaggerated appreciation. Then I said, "He's not as stupid as he looks. I guess that extra chromosome hasn't hurt his eyesight."

We would have continued the verbal beat-down, but the dude actually smiled, albeit a little ruefully. New Yorkers like a snappy comeback.

11-02-2012, 07:15 PM	#1
Anya Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Lesbian non-stone femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, her Relationship Status: Committed to being good to myself Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: West Coast Posts: 8,258 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 39,306 Thanked 40,447 Times in 7,284 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Yes, I had mastered the art of non-female/non-male pronouns I did this for so many years and I did not even risk getting thrown out of the service. I really hated myself every time that I did it. As a femme, everyone already assumed that I was straight and I had a ton of excuses as to why I let them believe that. Underneath it all was probably just as simple as fear of rejection by telling the truth. I recently posted in the Listening to each other thread that I had another opportunity for a moment of truth and this time, I just told it like it really was/is. The VP that hired me at my new job asked me during a lunch with the two of us, about dating men. I hesitated just a beat and said, fuck it (to myself): "I don't date men, I date women". I can't even begin to write how freeing that felt and how glad I am that I did that. I will never use unambiguous words to describe my sexual orientation or who I date or who I love; ever again. __________________ ~Anya~ Democracy Dies in Darkness ~Washington Post "...I'm deeply concerned by recently adopted policies which punish children for their parents’ actions ... The thought that any State would seek to deter parents by inflicting such abuse on children is unconscionable." UN Human Rights commissioner

12-02-2012, 09:05 PM	#3
lusciouskiwi Senior Member How Do You Identify?: femme lesbian feminist Preferred Pronoun?: Anything except for "aunty" Relationship Status: Happy with my butch. Join Date: Jun 2012 Location: Aotearoa New Zealand Posts: 2,681 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 25,494 Thanked 9,095 Times in 1,899 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	bump!!! One of my uncles (whom I do not like) called me a "fucking dyke" to which I said "thanks, it's the nicest thing you've said to me all day" I'll think of some more positive stories and share later __________________ happiness is a form of courage. George Holbrook Jackson Risk! Risk anything! Care no more for the opinions of others, for those voices. Do the hardest thing on earth for you. Act for yourself. Face the truth. Katherine Mansfield Motivate yourself or be miserable. Whatever has to be done, it's always your choice. Wayne Dyer

11-02-2012, 08:43 PM	#2
macele Member How Do You Identify?: a bold-assed maximus Preferred Pronoun?: she Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: mississippi Posts: 1,066 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,178 Thanked 3,230 Times in 847 Posts Rep Power: 21474850	anya, good for you. makes me proud that you are proud lol.