03-19-2010, 04:46 AM | #41 |
Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
Femme Relationship Status:
. Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: .
Posts: 5,530
Thanks: 4,478
Thanked 12,949 Times in 3,419 Posts
Rep Power: 21474856 |
Do I agree with her choice?
No. But it's her choice and I respect that. |
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Miss Scarlett For This Useful Post: |
03-19-2010, 05:34 AM | #42 |
Roadster Guy
How Do You Identify?:
FTM, Stone Butch Preferred Pronoun?:
He Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Northeast
Posts: 7,745
Thanks: 26,545
Thanked 26,894 Times in 5,771 Posts
Rep Power: 21474858 |
Hey, Bit.
I am running off to work, but I wanted to acknowledge your post and let you know that I will respond tonight.
__________________
-Dapper Are you educated or indoctrinated? |
03-19-2010, 06:00 AM | #43 |
Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
femme Relationship Status:
attached Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: .
Posts: 6,896
Thanks: 29,046
Thanked 13,118 Times in 3,391 Posts
Rep Power: 21474857 |
Yes, her children didn't call up the media but, as their adult parent, she CHOSE to invite the media and any intrusion into her children's lives--and resulting fallout--was her decision.
|
The Following User Says Thank You to Soon For This Useful Post: |
03-19-2010, 07:06 AM | #44 |
Member
How Do You Identify?:
femme Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: in the mitten
Posts: 1,282
Thanks: 2,807
Thanked 1,605 Times in 545 Posts
Rep Power: 21474852 |
fifteen minutes of fame has certainly been acheived
|
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to torchiegirl For This Useful Post: |
03-19-2010, 07:59 AM | #45 |
Member
How Do You Identify?:
Queer femme submissive Relationship Status:
Married Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: UK
Posts: 969
Thanks: 1,449
Thanked 4,261 Times in 677 Posts
Rep Power: 21474851 |
http://www.closeronline.co.uk/RealLi...y-to-72st.aspx
This woman is selfish. She obviously cares way more about getting her rocks off -which, to me, seems to be what it's all about - than she does about spending time with her children, and given the fact that she already has health issues directly related to her weight, she obviously doesn't care a shit about their future. As to the working to pay for her food excuse, - I don't care how many hours a day she 'has' to work, the simple truth is that she obviously enjoys doing it rather than spending time with her daughter as otherwise, she wouldn't be doing what she's doing and wouldn't be relying on poor old Phillipe to 'do the things she can't' - what about the cost of her medical treatment, past and present, who's been paying/going to be paying for that? Again, she doesn't seem to care. So, would I take her kid/s away from her? In a heartbeat. Womyn the world over have no choice but to work long hours in order to support their families. This woman works long hours simply because she wants to get her name in a record book and be famous, even if doing so means depriving her children of a mother? Please. Words |
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Words For This Useful Post: |
03-19-2010, 08:27 AM | #46 | |
Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Hippy Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: *
Posts: 3,750
Thanks: 6,499
Thanked 11,917 Times in 2,700 Posts
Rep Power: 21474854 |
Quote:
Thank You Juney.
And how did this situation begin to be compared with MS? I'm not really sure how to feel about this. I did not choose MS, however I take it on with gusto as I feel it was given to me because perhaps someone else could not handle it. It is my Gift. This woman is making a conscious choice to gain weight, has a goal...to reach. I gained 12 pounds since last month, not because I had a goal...but because the MS is giving me a hard time along with Raynauds now, and my mobility has been effected. Her mobility is already effected, and she plans to make it even harder to do the things I consider myself lucky to do. So the comparison with this thread topic and MS has me befuddled this morning. I shall marinate on this a bit over coffee.
__________________
|
|
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to Daywalker For This Useful Post: |
03-19-2010, 08:34 AM | #47 |
Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
femme Preferred Pronoun?:
she Relationship Status:
Married Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: rose cottage
Posts: 5,517
Thanks: 8,495
Thanked 15,667 Times in 3,992 Posts
Rep Power: 21474856 |
I was the one who brought up MS. And I brought it up to illustrate there were OTHER reasons why people would not be able to tend to their children, yet that does not make them bad parents. In no way do I compare MS with her being a Gainer. Hers is by choice. MS comes as it does.
I laid in bed last night and thought about her. I thought about how selfish of a person she is for putting her business/pleasure ahead of her children. And then i realized she is a work aholic as well...she cannot escape from her means of work..her web site. She has to condition her body to be fat all the time... then I thought...no. No. NO! There is something very disturbing about her ...as disturbing as that woman who gave birth to 12 children. They are both using their children to demonstrate they are good people. If not for the kids, would we not turn our faces and look away? She NEEDS those kids to keep our focus on her...its another string for her to pull, another manipulation...
__________________
Pole bachit, a lis chuye.
The field sees, the forest hears |
The Following User Says Thank You to Soft*Silver For This Useful Post: |
03-19-2010, 08:38 AM | #48 |
Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
Femme Preferred Pronoun?:
She, Her, etc Relationship Status:
Single Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,767
Thanks: 9,029
Thanked 13,026 Times in 4,786 Posts
Rep Power: 21474858 |
I am very glad to see that everyone is having a discussion about this, and that so far everyone has been pretty respectful of one another even if we disagree on certain points. What really hurts Me in this case, is that she is consciously choosing to put her own health in danger in order to achieve a record that really should not be something to aim for. She is clearly, at some point, not going to be able to care for her kids and if your going to put your own needs before the needs of your kids then why do you even have them?
I'm not meaning to make anyone upset here and I apologize if anything I say hits a chord with anyone, but I guess I just don't get how she could think of only herself and not her kids. If she wanted to chase some kind of a record in Guiness, why not wait until your kids are older and moved out before you begin something that will surely kill you long before its your time. Its sad really that she is doing this to herself and her family, and even if it is her choice I personally don't agree with it but thats just Me |
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Leigh For This Useful Post: |
03-19-2010, 08:39 AM | #49 | |
Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Stonefemme Relationship Status:
married to Gryph Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Wichita, KS
Posts: 2,177
Thanks: 1,126
Thanked 3,772 Times in 1,264 Posts
Rep Power: 10778869 |
Quote:
My parents unofficially adopted the son of my mother's best friend when he was still in grade school, because her friend's MS had progressed to the point that she was not able to care for all ten of her children. No one EVER tried to take the children away. It would have been unconscionable. Gemme said, "So, anyone who has the money should just hire a nanny and not have that one on one quality time with their children?" *puzzled look* What is quality time? How do we define it? Is one required to dress a child for school in order to have quality time? Is one required to cook for that child to have quality time? What if one spends the time they have reading to a child, or helping a child with their spelling, or any of a hundred other things which show love but do not require physical activity? Believe me, I remember the times my mother read to me WAY more fondly than the times she went shrieking and slamming through the house doing housework, and by kindergarten we were all perfectly capable of taking our own baths and dressing ourselves. As for whether this particular woman has a choice in the matter, it's pretty normal for people to get up to a couple hundred pounds, maybe a little more--you know, for a woman, size 2x is a VERY common size. She weighs three times that. How did she get there? Surely she has the same hormonal imbalances that plague anyone who weighs three or four hundred pounds, right? Nobody gets that big just by eating; your hormones have to be out of whack for that kind of weight. Seriously, by the time a person weighs five or six hundred pounds, what can they do for a living? Does this woman truly have the life choices that people are ascribing to her? Maybe she does; maybe I'm seeing it wrong. But in this day and age when child protection agencies are failing to rescue children who are beaten every day, children who are the victims of incest, children who are used for sex with strangers so their parents can get more drugs--all parental choices!--in this day and age when the system utterly fails those who need it the very most, why are we focused on this woman? I have a very uncomfortable feeling that it's because she's visible. I have a very uncomfortable feeling that it's because she's trespassing on our culture's strongly-held stereotypes of proper womanhood, proper motherhood. We do not actually know that her children are or will be unhappy or neglected in any way. |
|
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Bit For This Useful Post: |
03-19-2010, 08:48 AM | #50 |
Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
The original lime-twisted femme Preferred Pronoun?:
I answer to most things, especially lesbian. Relationship Status:
Still loving my Mare ;) Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 4,683
Thanks: 1,343
Thanked 11,424 Times in 2,978 Posts
Rep Power: 21474854 |
I've always felt that once you have children, your life isn't 'just' yours anymore. Your children come first.
With that being said, I really don't think I have to say anymore.
__________________
|
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to NJFemmie For This Useful Post: |
03-19-2010, 08:54 AM | #51 |
Member
How Do You Identify?:
Queer Femme Leatherdyke Preferred Pronoun?:
She/her Relationship Status:
In a relationship/non-monogamous Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Fort Worth, TX
Posts: 877
Thanks: 276
Thanked 1,209 Times in 366 Posts
Rep Power: 2427287 |
I find it interesting that the people who dont see how destructive this is for the children, are people who dont HAVE children.
(non judgy..just an observation) |
03-19-2010, 08:56 AM | #52 |
Mentally Delicious
How Do You Identify?:
Queer High Femme, thank you very much Preferred Pronoun?:
Mme. Relationship Status:
Married to JD. Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 10,446
Thanks: 5,995
Thanked 42,872 Times in 7,835 Posts
Rep Power: 21474861 |
I've been kinda mulling this thing over in my head for a couple of days.
I think the place that I keep coming back to is centered somewhere around the whole "what about the children" thing. Let me caveat what Im about to say with "I dont have kids for a reason": I hear a lot of people bringing up the discussion point that this woman should be able to do whatever she wants but that it's the children's well-being that is the "but, but, but..." in this scenario. The idea that the woman can't do what she wants because she must put her children's needs above her own. The idea that it is "selfish" of her to focus on herself so wholly when she has children. Im not at all saying I dont agree with this because I do think that bringing a child into this world is not something that people can do without responsibility. I think that children aren't able to take care of themselves (for the most part) and that parents have a responsibility to make good decisions around their health and well-being. My itchy spot is the culture of "Motherhood" that states that getting pregnant and having a child must change the focus of the woman's life. I think I'm feeling something around all of those automaton-ish Soccer Mom's who whisk their kids from one recital to the next, bust their ass to be the "perfect Mom", but somehow lose themselves along the way. I think that on some level society expects that or, as Bit said, you really run the risk as a Mother of being seen as an in improper Mother. I think about a lot of Moms I have known who had kids and I didn't recognize them a year later. They no longer took care of themselves, they stopped doing their hobbies, their entire lives became focused on keeping the child healthy and happy...and somewhere in all of that chaos, the Mother forgot to keep *herself* healthy and so the child turned out to be an ill-behaved, spoiled little asshole that nobody could stand to be around. (can you tell I don't do kids?) :P I also wonder if this were a Man, if anyone would be asking about *his* children's well-being. I can put aside my irritation over the fat=unhealthy thing for the sake of this discussion because I, too, agree that at 1000 pounds (even 600) that this woman's mobility is (as written in the article) severely limited. I imagine she might also have some weight-related joint issues either now or at some point. Im thinking that she is buying into some fetishization around fat too. I looked at 3 of her websites and it looks like she participates in the feeder/gainer community and fat-love communities pretty heavily. More thoughts in a bit..
__________________
. . . |
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Medusa For This Useful Post: |
03-19-2010, 08:57 AM | #53 | |
Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
femme Relationship Status:
attached Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: .
Posts: 6,896
Thanks: 29,046
Thanked 13,118 Times in 3,391 Posts
Rep Power: 21474857 |
Responding to underlined portions: (using Words' provided link)
Quote:
How did she get where she is/was? ..... At the age of 24 Donna married Robert Simpson, a chef who encouraged her eating by bringing home leftovers from work to feed her. “He’d come home with steak and desserts,” she recalls. “He liked me supersized.” ...... For the first time ever she went on a diet, urged on by her father who was concerned for her health, and lost 5st in six months. But she soon lapsed when she met fat-lover Philippe Gouamba, 47, in an online chat room for oversized women in 2006. “When I ate enough for five people on our first date, it really impressed him,” says Donna, from New Jersey, USA. Philippe, who counts watching his girlfriend eat as one of his favourite hobbies, says: “I’ve always been attracted to big women, but Donna is my fantasy. The more she weighs, the sexier she is.” How she is planning to get to her target weight (1000 lbs.): “My food costs £400 a week,” says Donna. “In a typical day I’ll eat four burgers and fries, a loaf of bread with peanut butter and jam, four servings of meatloaf and mashed potato, a large pizza, a chocolate cake with ice cream and cream, 12 cupcakes, two cheesecakes and fizzy drinks. -------- Her health problems (and their effects on her children): To reach her target, ex-carer Donna, who already suffers from diabetes and high-blood pressure, needs to gain another 27st and predicts it will take her until 2012 at her current weight gain of 7st a year. ..... Although doctors had said her 38st frame would make it almost impossible to conceive, Donna fell pregnant within three months of dating Phillipe. But she developed diabetes and high-blood pressure during pregnancy and needed a team of 19 doctors and nurses to get through the high-risk Caesarean birth. When baby Jacqueline was born weighing 8lbs 14oz in February 2007, Donna became the world’s fattest woman to give birth – the previous largest had weighed 34st. But she admits she struggles to care for her daughter, as she can barely walk 20ft without needing to sit down. “It’s difficult keeping up with Jacqueline, but we’re very closely bonded,” says Donna. “Fortunately, anything I can’t do with her, her dad can, so I don’t feel guilty.” |
|
03-19-2010, 09:00 AM | #54 |
Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
femme Relationship Status:
attached Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: .
Posts: 6,896
Thanks: 29,046
Thanked 13,118 Times in 3,391 Posts
Rep Power: 21474857 |
I find it destructive to herself and her children:
|
03-19-2010, 09:04 AM | #55 | |
Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Hippy Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: *
Posts: 3,750
Thanks: 6,499
Thanked 11,917 Times in 2,700 Posts
Rep Power: 21474854 |
Quote:
People with MS can and do have and raise and tend to their children.
__________________
|
|
The Following User Says Thank You to Daywalker For This Useful Post: |
03-19-2010, 09:07 AM | #56 |
Member
How Do You Identify?:
A Force with which to be reckoned Preferred Pronoun?:
just be nice... Relationship Status:
I call her Mine Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Transplanted to the PNW
Posts: 1,246
Thanks: 2,552
Thanked 2,476 Times in 706 Posts
Rep Power: 14753261 |
[QUOTE=Bit;69864]why are we focused on this woman?
I have a very uncomfortable feeling that it's because she's visible. I have a very uncomfortable feeling that it's because she's trespassing on our culture's strongly-held stereotypes of proper womanhood, proper motherhood. Bit, I snipped you post for brevity as this is the part that I wanted to respond to - I think we are focused on "this woman" because she chose to put her quest for 1000lbs and her means of income (her websites) in the public eye. My feelings about how she is instilling, what will most likely become, habits and ideas around food that her children will feel is "normal" and only led to what are commonly known health issues related to morbid obesity. I feel as a mother, it is my responsibility to teach my son certain things; after all, I am his primary reference point or "barometer" in how to move through the world. I try to teach him that relationships aren't disposable and that they are about love AND commitment. I try to teach him to embrace diversity in ALL things - people, music, politics, religion, et al. I also try to teach him about moderation and healthy eating habits. I know that he also learns less from my words and more from my actions - and is likely to mimic the behaviors he sees. From that perspective, I don't care how many outside sources her children have for healthy living. I believe they will take more from her behaviors than from any external influence. I always feel if someone puts something out in public, its fair game for discussion, opinions, comments and, at times, judgement and criticisms based on the "me" barometer of right/wrong/appropriate/inappropriate/healthy/nonhealthy. From that me barometer, I just think she is being selfish and unfair to her children. Christie |
03-19-2010, 09:08 AM | #57 | |
Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
Femme Preferred Pronoun?:
She, Her, etc Relationship Status:
Single Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,767
Thanks: 9,029
Thanked 13,026 Times in 4,786 Posts
Rep Power: 21474858 |
Quote:
Now I know that I'm not the healthiest eater in the world, and I often eat too much, but just thinking that one person could eat this much in a typical day makes Me sick (I mean physically nauseated) How can you eat that much in one day, seriously? |
|
03-19-2010, 09:09 AM | #58 |
Member
How Do You Identify?:
A Force with which to be reckoned Preferred Pronoun?:
just be nice... Relationship Status:
I call her Mine Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Transplanted to the PNW
Posts: 1,246
Thanks: 2,552
Thanked 2,476 Times in 706 Posts
Rep Power: 14753261 |
|
The Following User Says Thank You to christie For This Useful Post: |
03-19-2010, 09:11 AM | #59 | |
Member
How Do You Identify?:
Femme who lives with A DayWalker Preferred Pronoun?:
who cares just yell for Mrs Day Relationship Status:
Very attached Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: In hys heart
Posts: 241
Thanks: 263
Thanked 493 Times in 148 Posts
Rep Power: 3181106 |
Quote:
there is No comparison baybee!
__________________
|
|
03-19-2010, 09:13 AM | #60 |
Member
How Do You Identify?:
Queer Femme Leatherdyke Preferred Pronoun?:
She/her Relationship Status:
In a relationship/non-monogamous Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Fort Worth, TX
Posts: 877
Thanks: 276
Thanked 1,209 Times in 366 Posts
Rep Power: 2427287 |
And if these men think being that large is sexy, why dont THEY gain the weight?
I feel like this is just one more way woman are trying to look a certain way for a man. It makes me sick. Starving yourself to the detriment of your health is just as horrible. |
|
|