Who Should Have The Right To Marry?

[Beloved]

I'm not against polygamy between consenting adults but I think if it were to become legal there would be issues to be ironed out with social security. The benefits would need to be arranged between many people rather than just two. It's more complex than just 2 people getting married. It's not impossible to work something out...but it requires a lot of consideration.

[Corkey]

I think every human has the right to marry. I have some reservations around poly marriage, but those have to do with property rights and estate management for children. However, even poly folks should have the right to marry. I just think the right to marriage is a human right, not necessarily just for the procreation of children.

[blush]

Originally Posted by pajara

I would like to see something that allows anyone, of a consenting age, to marry as many people as they want, of any gender, identity, nationality, religion, color, etc.

ALONG WITH an ammendment to BAN divorce, with the exception of extreme cruelty or abuse. And cheating isn't extreme cruelty. You go to therapy, you work it out. If you love them enough to want to marry them, then you love them enough and forever to make it work! (Hence why I personally will not get married again. It's FOREVER.)

My $.02.

A

Um, not for me. This is too black and white. Cheating can be extreme cruelty, and asking people to suck it up and stick it out comes with its own complications. It creates a situation where two potentially angry people are stuck with each other forever. More than marriage, people have a right to persue their happiness. Sometimes what they thought was their happiness changes. They shouldn't be sentenced to a lifetime of misery.

Having said that, I strongly feel marriage is a heartfelt, sincere commitment for a lifetime. I just don't like morality baggage that gets slung around if divorce is an option.

[Ciaran]

The issue of who should have the right to marry is an incredibly complex one.

I think that all, or almost all, of us on this site would support equal marriage rights for LGBT people as or hetrosexuals. However, our views on who should have the actual right to marry no doubt vary significantly depending on our cultural, political, societal and religious views.

For example, at what age should someone be allowed to marry? If a minor, should he / she be allowed to marry with parental consent? I'm not a parent and never will be but cannot believe that I would give my consent to a child of 16 or 17 to marry. Similarly, whilst it is legal, should society regulate to stop a person of 18 marrying someone of 88?

Also, how do we deal with persons who may be mentally incapacitated in some way but, equally, as deserving of love and a committed relationship as others?

Added to the above, there is the cultural overlay. For example, in many South Asian societies, the right to marry is held but not the right to choose your spouse. This would be more important than the right to marry for me as I can just imagine who my parents would set me up with !!

Also, of course, the added complexities of those already married and wanting to marry again, whether their current marriage remains in law or not. Certainly, as a Roman Catholic, leaving aside the whole LGBT obstacle, I would have to jump through significant hurdles to get married a second time in the event of divorce. Similarly, until relatively recently, many societies expected widows not to remarry in the event of their husband's death.

Apologies for my ramble .... just the initial thoughts that came into my head upon reading the opening post.

[Tuff Stuff]

Forced marriages are not cool,like underage girls/boys being forced to marry full ass grown men/women aganist their will.Abusers who end up marrying their victims,yuck!...and prison imates,you gave up any rights when you commited a horrible crime.
Marrying your blood relations sounds creepy also.

That's my opinion,of course.

My *snort*

[MsTinkerbelly]

A lot of people fought for a very long time to legalize same-sex marriage, and I hope people will continue to fight for marriages that are polyamourous as well.

Throughout history marriages have been among any number of consenting adults, and it is only recently that the idea of a monogamous marriage has become the norm.

[Shystonefem]

Who am I to judge? I STRONGLY believe in "Live and let live".

I do, however, believe that the human brain should be close to completely developed when making decisions like that. 18+ only please.

I have no right to force my beliefs on anyone else. So, to every person OF LEGAL AGE that wants to get married to another human being...... Rock on

[imperfect_cupcake]

I don't see the moral problem with marrying your cousin, or hell, even a sibling or half sibling (many siblings don't grow up together) - father/daughter, uncle/niece or cross generational intra family marraige? No. I can see way too many potentialproblems with consent with that.

You don't have to have kids to have a marraige. If marraige is not about children, then I don't see the issue. I may think brother-brother might be creepy, but that's my *moral* feelings of mild repugnance and nothing to do with their right to love each other. My morals don't belong in their marraige.

Adult = 18. If you can vote, you can get married. Full stop. If you aren't old enough to vote, you have no biz getting married.

Group marriages are fine too. As long as it's not to young underage girls in religious cults.

Consenting and adult.

[JDeere]

Originally Posted by MsTinkerbelly

A lot of people fought for a very long time to legalize same-sex marriage, and I hope people will continue to fight for marriages that are polyamourous as well.

Throughout history marriages have been among any number of consenting adults, and it is only recently that the idea of a monogamous marriage has become the norm.

I will ditto on this post!

[Corkey]

There are biological reasons for not marrying ones cousin, Uncle, Aunt... I mean if one is fine with birth defects boink away, but don't ask me to pay for the offspring that actually make it to the world. Consent or not.

[imperfect_cupcake]

You don't have to have kids to marry though.

[Corkey]

No one doesn't, but oft kids are the result of marriages.I don't want to pay for some peoples brain defects that are entirely preventable, that is why one is not allowed to marry ones blood relatives.

[imperfect_cupcake]

Would you have any issue with gay blood relatives marrying?

[Corkey]

Yes, insest is still a thing.

[JDeere]

Isn't incest also illegal?

Anyways marrying a cousin or someone in your blood line, in my opinion is nasty.

I think some people need to truly think hard about being married, because a marriage is something to work at, not something you do and when things get tough take the easy road aka divorce.

[imperfect_cupcake]

Then your objection isn't about children, its a person al moral stance. Which is totally fine. I just prefer people would be upfront about being morally repulsed by something.

Marrying your first cousin is not illegal. Thats relates by blood. Some people think that's incest. But its legal.

I don't think my personal morals should belong in anyone's bed or love relationship so long as there is very clear consent between two adults. Even two people related by blood. No matter how *I* feel about it morally.

And that's just something I personally believe. My morals have nothing to do with other peoples happiness. I have moral objections to plenty of things. But I don't think my personal morals should interfere with other peoples rights and freedoms. Thats where I differ from religion.

[MsTinkerbelly]

Originally Posted by imperfect_cupcake

Then your objection isn't about children, its a person al moral stance. Which is totally fine. I just prefer people would be upfront about being morally repulsed by something.

Marrying your first cousin is not illegal. Thats relates by blood. Some people think that's incest. But its legal.

I don't think my personal morals should belong in anyone's bed or love relationship so long as there is very clear consent between two adults. Even two people related by blood. No matter how *I* feel about it morally.

And that's just something I personally believe. My morals have nothing to do with other peoples happiness. I have moral objections to plenty of things. But I don't think my personal morals should interfere with other peoples rights and freedoms. Thats where I differ from religion.

That's where you differ from a great many people's religion, but not from mine.

The greatest of all gifts is love, and if you know not love, then you have nothing. I'm paraphrasing here, but it's pretty close to the quote from the Bible.

Until you posted your thoughts on relationships of a more familial nature, I like most people thought...."hmmm that is incest and it's wrong". But, if you believe the Bible ( and a lot of people don't I know), we all came from 2 people which makes all of our relationships incestuous.

You always make me think

[imperfect_cupcake]

Absolutely fair enough Tinkerbelly! I am not saying the thought does make me uncomfortable. It certainly does. But I always think: homosexuality was illegal. And wrong. And it makes people uncomfortable. If we are talking about two people from the same generation, who are adults and adopt kids or get outside sperm. Then what is actually the objection? Logically, I mean. Just my feeling of discomfort? Why is that enough to ban people who love each other from being together? My moral discomfort. Just like other people's moral discomfort with being gay and having an adult relationship of fully cognizant consent? People feel moral repugnance for my relationships. Does that make it ok to make it illegal?

Legality should not be based on morality. It shpd be based on impact of harm. Two half brothers who weren't raised together meet for the first time when they are 25. They fall in love. Who are they hurting? No one. Let them get married if they want.

[Corkey]

Actually marrying your first cousin is illegal in the states, due to blood relative. If two people are from different bloodlines then by all mean they have the right to be married. If two children are from different marriages then they can actually be married.

[JDeere]

Originally Posted by Corkey

Actually marrying your first cousin is illegal in the states, due to blood relative. If two people are from different bloodlines then by all mean they have the right to be married. If two children are from different marriages then they can actually be married.

It is illegal here in Texas and in Oklahoma!

But thank you for this!