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#21 |
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I don't think its odd at all. I respect whatever differences everyone has. I grew up with this in my family. My mom,grandparents, and aunts all offered kisses on the lips, cheeks and forehead. I do with my teen daughter. Kisses along with hugs and cuddles is just a way to say hello, goodbye, goodnight, and show affection with my family.
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#22 | ||
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I will Hongi my English cousin and kiss him on the cheek and very occasionally on the lips; usually at Christmas and Birthday’s. Friends, I sometimes Hongi and kiss on the cheek depending on their comfort level.
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#23 |
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Im a VERY affectionate person, and i kiss my kids on the lips, forehead, cheeks, nose and hands. If i sit on the couch to watch television i am usually surrounded within minutes with my little ones laying all over me. I have never felt even the tinest feeling that it was unappropriate at any time. I do however agree, culture does feed into it, I have been raised surrounded by family and kissed and hugs were always abundant!
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#24 |
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Yes, I think shows of affection are culturally based and we bring customs from our families into our lives.
My family wasn't very affectionate, but when I married, my in-laws were. It was a big step for me to give my mother-in-law and father-in-law pecks on the lips...and even some of the aunts and uncles----all these folks were in their 70s and 80s then. I broadened my cultural experiences. When I had children, I did give them little pecks on the lips and just about wherever else. As they got older, the kisses became more pecks on the cheek or forehead. Now in their 30s, we've settled into hugs with them and their significant others. As for my friends, they all know I'm a hugger and a kisser. I've been known to kiss complete strangers on the cheek. Some of my friends will even get friendly pecks on the lips. But more soulful kissing is reserved for those I date. Again, I think that it's a matter of what your culture requires, how comfortable you are with kissing, and how comfortable those around you are--IMHO |
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#25 |
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I'm very physically affectionate, very cuddly, very smoochy, but
I've never had the habit of kissing anyone on the mouth but my lovers. I love Pete's mother, and I am very happy to be whatever I am to her, but I am not comfortable when she kisses me on the mouth, and I avert my face. I hope I haven't hurt her feelings, but for me, it's oogy. |
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#26 |
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I usually kiss family and close friends on the lips...unless they offer their cheek. It's all good.
A lot of affection in my family growing up, but not everyone is comfortable with my spur of the moment, you just gotta plant one on 'em, kisses. I had a person I was dating nearly fall backwards in his chair when I came around the side and tried to unexpectedly smooch him...never tried THAT again! LOL |
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#27 |
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a kiss is a kiss ....is a kiss .. ooolalala
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![]() Looking back, it seems to me that "we" lost kissing on the mouth after my sister and I were molested by a stepfather. After that happened, my dad seemed uncomfortable with any show of affection. I can't really say that I blame him either, he probably did not want to trigger any memory for us or make us fearful. These days, his body is so fragile that anything more than a light hug may cause him pain. My kids and I hug; we do the ASL sign for "I love you" when they get out of the car at school; the little ones will kiss me on the cheek and I will return that kiss; my oldest is at that stage where a kiss, even on the cheek, is not going to happen (he is way too cool for that). As far as extended family, we may or may not hug. My mom & I see each other at least every other day so we really do not hug. But I hug the rest of my family when I see them & when we part ways. The only person I kiss on the mouth is the one that I am involved with. I think a kiss is intimate-you are sharing your breath, one of the essences of your life. I have been this way all of my adult life. I am actually a very tactile AND affectionate person. I love a good hug; I welcome a kiss on the cheek or the hand (which I adore); I love a kiss on the forehead from someone I am close to. I do not share kisses on the mouth although I have no problem at all with people who do. ![]()
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#29 |
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It all comes down to what we as individuals are comfortable with. I, too, kissed my father on the lips (a quick peck) growing up. I think it's sad that some people equate kissing with the mouth as always being sexual or erotic. Just as there are different ways to express affection, there are different types of kisses.
My son is 12 and we still kiss on the lips. I respect everyone's feelings regarding this topic, however those who sexualize an act as innocent as this one, probably have their own hang-ups they need to deal with. Kissing makes us happy!
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#30 |
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I did not grow up in an affectionate family and never hugged or kissed anyone except my grandmother who I would hug. I started hugging my mother towards the end of her life , but after her death I actually put myself through self hug therapy. I just decided I needed more affection in my life and many of my friends were huggers. They knew not to hug me as it made me uncomfortable, but I started asking for a hug and slowly became more and more comfortable with it. Now I hug everyone.
I am very affectionate with my friends now and have many I kiss on the lips, others on the cheek. I think a lot of it has to do with what we grew up with and how comfortable we are. I just made the decision that I wanted to be more affectionate. Unfortunately my kids did not grow up with me being overly affectionate and now I try to make up for it (without going overboard). One is very receptive and the other is a bit more standoffish. So one I lip kiss and the other I cheek or forehead kiss, but I always hug them. I don't think either is wrong (lips or cheeks for our kids), but as long as both people are comfortable it is fine.
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#31 |
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I do air kisses, mwah mwah!
I actually hate anyone but my partner (or whoever I happen to be sexually involved with) trying to give me lip kisses and it actively creeps me out if I watch other people do it to their children or friends. I really don't like it.
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#32 |
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Hmmm ...this thread brings back fond memories indeed. My father’s family wasn’t very affectionate; hugs were and still are ridged. Kisses are brief on the cheek, and I love yous exchanged only as adults, and only after death came knocking and the realization that one doesn’t want to miss saying what is in the heart.
My mother’s side of the family was the extreme opposite. Always touching, sitting on laps, hugging and kissing whenever and whatever was offered (lips, cheek, head, hand, etc). My brothers and I are the same as my mother…very touchy. We lean on each other when sitting near…touch each other just to be touching. My Grammy still counts kisses and hugs…if you don’t give her one (no matter who you are) she’ll count and make you give her two of each on the way out (my mother does the same thing). I don’t think anything of kissing who ever on the lips, because it’s not intimate to me. To me there is a much different exchange between partners that creates the intimacy. My mother still sits on my lap…kisses my lips…holds my face…and looks into my eyes as only a momma could. I respect those who live differently and the boundaries they hold...but for me, I adore it and wouldn’t change a thing. |
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#33 | |
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In fact, my youngest asked my partner if she would like to sleep on the couch one Friday so they could sleep in bed with me instead. ![]() |
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#34 |
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Kiss on the cheek. Sometimes just a hug.
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#36 |
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We Colombians kiss most everyone on the cheek.
Hugs are pretty common too. |
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#37 |
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Interesting thread. My family is very affectionate, too. We use terms of endearment. We hug. We say the L word (love, I mean!). We kiss the cheek each time we see our sibs, cousins, family friends, etc....but it's always on the cheek.
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#38 |
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I automatically offer a cheek or give a kiss on the cheek.
Although if a family member offer their lips, I do without a second thought. |
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#39 |
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<----- wanton family & friend lip-kisser
My mother's side of the family (that I grew up with) were/are very affectionate - free and easy with the kisses on the lips, cheeks, foreheads, hands, eskimo kisses, hugs, arms draped over shoulders, hand holding and lots of other small gestures of affection. But despite that there is a wide range of preference when it comes to demonstrating affection. My sister and I greet with lip kisses, I hug her husband, my brother and I greet/part with a brief hug and a quiet "love you"; my mother and I cheek kiss/hug combo, her husband and I don't kiss or hug because it makes him uncomfortable. I'm okay with each variation because each is genuine and natural to that relationship. The children in my life are all very affectionate and get hugs and kisses from me (without reservation). I don't kiss all of my friends on the lips, but I do with many of those who are closest to me. The way in which I greet or demonstrate affection to a friend or family member is specific to the individual. I have many friends who are very affectionate, and I have friends who prefer no physical touch at all. And plenty who fall in between. Just like types of love (and loving relationships) are different, types of kisses are different.
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#40 |
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Im half latino ,,my family always kisses on the cheek,,if you dont, they think your mad at them lol !
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