BIC pens for her sparks snarkfest on Amazon - Page 2

chefhmboyrd · 09-17-2012, 02:37 PM

I have been informed that nobody can use my applicator except G-Snap

*Anya* · 10-12-2012, 06:41 PM

Bumping this thread.

Gaea just posted a comedy bit Ellen did on these pens on the CIJS thread and I remembered this very funny thread.

laruss · 10-12-2012, 08:28 PM

Ellen had this on her show today. I tried to find a video, but they are not available outside of the United States and I am in Canada, so you will have to Google it. It was quite funny.

*Anya* · 10-12-2012, 08:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by laruss

Ellen had this on her show today. I tried to find a video, but they are not available outside of the United States and I am in Canada, so you will have to Google it. It was quite funny.

Look on the CIJS thread. Gaea posted it.

Are you not able to see it on her post?

macele · 10-12-2012, 10:25 PM

that ellen is a mess. she was quite the smartass about the For Her pens. love it love it love it!

Bèsame* · 10-12-2012, 10:31 PM

My purse just got lighter, took out all those man pens!!

*Anya* · 10-12-2012, 10:53 PM

I only have two hands. One to apply lipstick and another to hold my copy of "Fifty Shades of Grey". This is exactly what I needed! A pen that looks pretty enough to hold between my lips. Now husband-finding will be a much easier task. It's so logical - EVEN FOR A WOMAN! Thank you, BIC
..........

It's a disgrace. First they get the right to vote, now this. Once again, the most oppressed minority - white middle class men - have been overlooked when it comes to disposable pens. You can bet that if BiC came out with pens that 'fit comfortably in a man's fist' and look like a pint of lager, there would be uproar.
...........

I had my man read me the packaging details because it was so beautiful I just HAD to know what was inside. I discovered that it contained something I did not ever believe possible. A pen. For me! Now I just need some pastel coloured books so I can learn to read and I'll be able to use them to write by myself. At last!
...........

Thank you, thank you bic. My womb is throbbing at the very thought of holding such a thing! My husband says before long I'll be able to write my very own shopping lists and cake recipes.
...........

When she wrapped her small but capable hand around the Cristal pen and stroked it, she saw stars, and she knew there were none out tonight. She let out her breath in a long, uneven moan. Her thumb rubbed the tip of the Cristal pen, spreading a drop of ink. She opened her mouth and lay her Cristal pen on her delicate plump moist lips. She shook the shaft of the Cristal pen with her hand urging the ink out. It was too much. She was too good. She couldn't stop as she crossed washing powder off the shopping list....
..........

After suffering debilitating gender-based paranoia for many years due to my large hands, interest in science and ability to make my own decisions, I became convinced that even though I was born and live as woman, society would never accept me. My life was a battle but I fought on, between bouts of hormonal weeping and watching endless romcoms and DVD boxsets of 'Friends', yet was unable to connect as a woman or find that elusive romance or 'friend'. I subscribe to all the women's magazines, buy all the latest beauty products, still all I have added to my life is a pile of old magazines and bottles of vegetable oil based lotions. Nothing was working.

Then, my sister came to my house one day to find out why I had not attended our weekly trip to the salon, only to find me lying among the cupcakes I had lovingly made her, curled in the feotal position and rythmically rubbing my body with an unplugged Ladyshave. Seeing my despair at the harsh reality of not being feminine enough, she wept as she bathed me in a scented bubble bath. Leaving me alone with a chocolate bar to eat seductively, she crept out and sourced me a small pack of BiC Cristal for her.

Within moments I was able to sit unassisted again. I brushed and even swung my newly washed hair, and my tears slowly dried as I added layer upon layer of beauty product, using the pens to mark which worked and didn't. I wrote a to-do list named 'The start of the rest of your life.' I truly did start living that day.
..........

Having just had a hysterectomy and mourning the loss of my womanhood I have been desperately searching for validation of my sex again. Thank god for Bic - my friends bought me a pac of BiC Cristal and I feel whole again. The pink itallic writing giving me comfort and joy. One can only assume that had Virginia Woolf or Sylvia Plath had such wonderful writing tools there literary contributions would have been much happier and easier to understand. Thank you Bic!

laruss · 10-13-2012, 06:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by *Anya*

Look on the CIJS thread. Gaea posted it.

Are you not able to see it on her post?

I went back and looked and I was able to see hers.
When I tried to open it on youtube I couldn't. That happens to a lot of videos especially if there is TV content.

JAGG · 10-13-2012, 07:07 AM

This is freakin hilarious!!!!!!!!
A few of my fav:
~This seemed to work ok on low flow days but on heavy flow days I ended up looking like a crime scene. I still prefer Playtex Gentle Glide Tampons...
~But wait a moment - once the women get the pens, what are they supposed to write on? Man paper?
~I am very disappointed with this product. Whilst it did have an "easy glide", it did not remove any hairs and left me with blue lines from my ankle to my knee. Not up to your usual standards Bic.
These made me laugh out loud. Thanks for that Kobi!!

stargazingboi · 10-13-2012, 09:29 AM

*wipes tear from eye* all I have to say is thank you for creating this thread...what a great way to wake up..coffee and a good laugh, priceless!

Metro · 10-13-2012, 10:05 AM

"For years and years now I have really dreaded having to use those awful plain, boring, clear and blue pens for my everyday writing. I became depressed and didn't like going out with friends or doing anything because I was so ashamed of having to use them. But then!!! To my surprise, they came out with BIC cristal for her pens and my life changed! I wasn't afraid to use my pen in public anymore, I started going out with my friends and was a PROUD owner and user of BIC for her. Thank you for changing my life and making me realize how great being a woman can be!"

–Cameron Buchner

(via Amazon review, September 10, 2012)

Metro · 10-13-2012, 10:08 AM

"I really love these pens, but there is one minor problem. They only let me put a period after four sentences, or 28 words."

– sciencegrrrl

(via Amazon review, October 2, 2012)

Metro · 10-13-2012, 10:15 AM

"When anything is labeled 'For Her' it must be in pastel colors that applies to everything including razors and now pens! It's so nice to have things labeled so women are not using standard masculine colors like black."

– Kia Singh

(via Amazon review, October 4, 2012)

macele · 10-13-2012, 10:30 AM

they have the slogan, "flick my bic!" ... says a lot. there's a good chance they are loving all the free advertising. smart folks. lol

*Anya* · 10-13-2012, 11:02 AM

This one makes me lol:
.......
I was recently given a box of these as a gift from my husband, but I have no idea what to do with them! They're too thin to make a good rolling pin. I can't ladle out my soups with them. And the tiny point doesn't even make a dent when I try to use one to chop veggies! I don't get it. If I can't use it in the kitchen, what the hell am I supposed to do with one???

Signed,

kitchen wench

Words · 10-13-2012, 11:19 AM

Wow. Just wow.

And this is the 21st Century, right?

*Shaking head.*

Words

Bit · 10-13-2012, 11:27 AM

Oh my word, we've laughed till we cried, and at one point Gryph laughed so hard she actually choked!

It was doggoned hard to read these aloud without cracking up halfway through. My favorite was the one where she finally found the orgasm button. STILL laughing!

09-17-2012, 02:37 PM	#21
chefhmboyrd Senior Member How Do You Identify?: man Preferred Pronoun?: beef Relationship Status: Uncle Daddy Snap Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: nashvegas Posts: 1,607 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,411 Thanked 2,846 Times in 898 Posts Rep Power: 14271905	applicator I have been informed that nobody can use my applicator except G-Snap __________________ what's a cowboy got to do to get a drink around here?

10-12-2012, 06:41 PM	#22
Anya Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Lesbian non-stone femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, her Relationship Status: Committed to being good to myself Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: West Coast Posts: 8,258 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 39,306 Thanked 40,459 Times in 7,283 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Bumping this thread. Gaea just posted a comedy bit Ellen did on these pens on the CIJS thread and I remembered this very funny thread. __________________ ~Anya~ Democracy Dies in Darkness ~Washington Post "...I'm deeply concerned by recently adopted policies which punish children for their parents’ actions ... The thought that any State would seek to deter parents by inflicting such abuse on children is unconscionable." UN Human Rights commissioner

10-12-2012, 08:28 PM	#23
laruss Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She or Goddess Relationship Status: Settled in Join Date: Mar 2012 Location: Edmonton Alberta Posts: 1,322 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,849 Thanked 5,329 Times in 1,045 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	Ellen had this on her show today. I tried to find a video, but they are not available outside of the United States and I am in Canada, so you will have to Google it. It was quite funny. __________________ Creativity is a drug I can't do without. -Cecil B. DeMille

10-12-2012, 10:31 PM	#26
Bèsame* Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Femm Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: loved by many Join Date: Sep 2012 Location: Closer to the waves Posts: 15,374 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 29,111 Thanked 40,941 Times in 10,727 Posts Rep Power: 21474864	My purse just got lighter, took out all those man pens!! __________________ kisses A kiss is a whisper in your mouth. Can I borrow a kiss? I promise to give it back.

10-12-2012, 10:53 PM	#27
Anya Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Lesbian non-stone femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, her Relationship Status: Committed to being good to myself Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: West Coast Posts: 8,258 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 39,306 Thanked 40,459 Times in 7,283 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Some more reviews on Amazon UK I only have two hands. One to apply lipstick and another to hold my copy of "Fifty Shades of Grey". This is exactly what I needed! A pen that looks pretty enough to hold between my lips. Now husband-finding will be a much easier task. It's so logical - EVEN FOR A WOMAN! Thank you, BIC .......... It's a disgrace. First they get the right to vote, now this. Once again, the most oppressed minority - white middle class men - have been overlooked when it comes to disposable pens. You can bet that if BiC came out with pens that 'fit comfortably in a man's fist' and look like a pint of lager, there would be uproar. ........... I had my man read me the packaging details because it was so beautiful I just HAD to know what was inside. I discovered that it contained something I did not ever believe possible. A pen. For me! Now I just need some pastel coloured books so I can learn to read and I'll be able to use them to write by myself. At last! ........... Thank you, thank you bic. My womb is throbbing at the very thought of holding such a thing! My husband says before long I'll be able to write my very own shopping lists and cake recipes. ........... When she wrapped her small but capable hand around the Cristal pen and stroked it, she saw stars, and she knew there were none out tonight. She let out her breath in a long, uneven moan. Her thumb rubbed the tip of the Cristal pen, spreading a drop of ink. She opened her mouth and lay her Cristal pen on her delicate plump moist lips. She shook the shaft of the Cristal pen with her hand urging the ink out. It was too much. She was too good. She couldn't stop as she crossed washing powder off the shopping list.... .......... After suffering debilitating gender-based paranoia for many years due to my large hands, interest in science and ability to make my own decisions, I became convinced that even though I was born and live as woman, society would never accept me. My life was a battle but I fought on, between bouts of hormonal weeping and watching endless romcoms and DVD boxsets of 'Friends', yet was unable to connect as a woman or find that elusive romance or 'friend'. I subscribe to all the women's magazines, buy all the latest beauty products, still all I have added to my life is a pile of old magazines and bottles of vegetable oil based lotions. Nothing was working. Then, my sister came to my house one day to find out why I had not attended our weekly trip to the salon, only to find me lying among the cupcakes I had lovingly made her, curled in the feotal position and rythmically rubbing my body with an unplugged Ladyshave. Seeing my despair at the harsh reality of not being feminine enough, she wept as she bathed me in a scented bubble bath. Leaving me alone with a chocolate bar to eat seductively, she crept out and sourced me a small pack of BiC Cristal for her. Within moments I was able to sit unassisted again. I brushed and even swung my newly washed hair, and my tears slowly dried as I added layer upon layer of beauty product, using the pens to mark which worked and didn't. I wrote a to-do list named 'The start of the rest of your life.' I truly did start living that day. .......... Having just had a hysterectomy and mourning the loss of my womanhood I have been desperately searching for validation of my sex again. Thank god for Bic - my friends bought me a pac of BiC Cristal and I feel whole again. The pink itallic writing giving me comfort and joy. One can only assume that had Virginia Woolf or Sylvia Plath had such wonderful writing tools there literary contributions would have been much happier and easier to understand. Thank you Bic! __________________ ~Anya~ Democracy Dies in Darkness ~Washington Post "...I'm deeply concerned by recently adopted policies which punish children for their parents’ actions ... The thought that any State would seek to deter parents by inflicting such abuse on children is unconscionable." UN Human Rights commissioner

10-12-2012, 10:25 PM	#25
macele Member How Do You Identify?: a bold-assed maximus Preferred Pronoun?: she Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: mississippi Posts: 1,066 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,178 Thanked 3,231 Times in 847 Posts Rep Power: 21474850	that ellen is a mess. she was quite the smartass about the For Her pens. love it love it love it!

10-13-2012, 07:07 AM	#29
JAGG Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Butch Preferred Pronoun?: JAGG Relationship Status: =) Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Tulsa (cat free zone) Posts: 6,093 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 18,651 Thanked 17,531 Times in 4,137 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	This is freakin hilarious!!!!!!!! A few of my fav: ~This seemed to work ok on low flow days but on heavy flow days I ended up looking like a crime scene. I still prefer Playtex Gentle Glide Tampons... ~But wait a moment - once the women get the pens, what are they supposed to write on? Man paper? ~I am very disappointed with this product. Whilst it did have an "easy glide", it did not remove any hairs and left me with blue lines from my ankle to my knee. Not up to your usual standards Bic. These made me laugh out loud. Thanks for that Kobi!! __________________ I don't want to spend my life with someone I can live with, I want to spend my life with someone I can't live without.

10-13-2012, 09:29 AM	#30
stargazingboi Senior Member How Do You Identify?: ~ Preferred Pronoun?: ~ Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: ~ Posts: 1,954 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 10,392 Thanked 8,318 Times in 1,626 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	wipes tear from eye all I have to say is thank you for creating this thread...what a great way to wake up..coffee and a good laugh, priceless!

10-13-2012, 10:05 AM	#31
Metro Senior Member How Do You Identify?: • Join Date: Jan 2012 Location: • Posts: 1,606 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,476 Thanked 2,911 Times in 730 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	Amazing! "For years and years now I have really dreaded having to use those awful plain, boring, clear and blue pens for my everyday writing. I became depressed and didn't like going out with friends or doing anything because I was so ashamed of having to use them. But then!!! To my surprise, they came out with BIC cristal for her pens and my life changed! I wasn't afraid to use my pen in public anymore, I started going out with my friends and was a PROUD owner and user of BIC for her. Thank you for changing my life and making me realize how great being a woman can be!" –Cameron Buchner (via Amazon review, September 10, 2012)

10-13-2012, 10:08 AM	#32
Metro Senior Member How Do You Identify?: • Join Date: Jan 2012 Location: • Posts: 1,606 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,476 Thanked 2,911 Times in 730 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	These are the best. Period. "I really love these pens, but there is one minor problem. They only let me put a period after four sentences, or 28 words." – sciencegrrrl (via Amazon review, October 2, 2012)

10-13-2012, 10:15 AM	#33
Metro Senior Member How Do You Identify?: • Join Date: Jan 2012 Location: • Posts: 1,606 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,476 Thanked 2,911 Times in 730 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	Thank Goodness for Labeling "For Her" "When anything is labeled 'For Her' it must be in pastel colors that applies to everything including razors and now pens! It's so nice to have things labeled so women are not using standard masculine colors like black." – Kia Singh (via Amazon review, October 4, 2012)

10-13-2012, 10:30 AM	#34
macele Member How Do You Identify?: a bold-assed maximus Preferred Pronoun?: she Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: mississippi Posts: 1,066 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,178 Thanked 3,231 Times in 847 Posts Rep Power: 21474850	they have the slogan, "flick my bic!" ... says a lot. there's a good chance they are loving all the free advertising. smart folks. lol

10-13-2012, 11:02 AM	#35
Anya Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Lesbian non-stone femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, her Relationship Status: Committed to being good to myself Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: West Coast Posts: 8,258 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 39,306 Thanked 40,459 Times in 7,283 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	This one makes me lol: ....... I was recently given a box of these as a gift from my husband, but I have no idea what to do with them! They're too thin to make a good rolling pin. I can't ladle out my soups with them. And the tiny point doesn't even make a dent when I try to use one to chop veggies! I don't get it. If I can't use it in the kitchen, what the hell am I supposed to do with one??? Signed, kitchen wench __________________ ~Anya~ Democracy Dies in Darkness ~Washington Post "...I'm deeply concerned by recently adopted policies which punish children for their parents’ actions ... The thought that any State would seek to deter parents by inflicting such abuse on children is unconscionable." UN Human Rights commissioner

10-13-2012, 11:19 AM	#36
Words Member How Do You Identify?: Queer femme submissive Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: UK Posts: 969 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,449 Thanked 4,258 Times in 677 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	Wow. Just wow. And this is the 21st Century, right? Shaking head. Words

10-13-2012, 11:27 AM	#37
Bit Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Stonefemme Relationship Status: married to Gryph Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Wichita, KS Posts: 2,177 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,126 Thanked 3,770 Times in 1,264 Posts Rep Power: 10778870	Oh my word, we've laughed till we cried, and at one point Gryph laughed so hard she actually choked! It was doggoned hard to read these aloud without cracking up halfway through. My favorite was the one where she finally found the orgasm button. STILL laughing!