FTM's and Transitioning

[Thinker]

Originally Posted by Ebon

The only reason it's taken me this long is because of the whole going to a therapist that probably isn't even transgendered that is going to tell me if they think that I'm ready.

The EXACT same thing was true for me, Ebon.

I totally get that...and respect it.

You can do this your way; it's just a matter of finding the right doctor.

[Linus]

Originally Posted by DapperButch

I was speaking to WPATH's Standards of Care. It is not a state thing, and yes, any doctor can ignore WPATH's reccomendations for hormones or any type of surgery.

It's funny. I didn't know that there was a Standard of Care or that WPATH existed until after I started to medically transition. I always thought that the Hippocratic Oath was enough but learned, as part of this process, that there is far more than just what I believe and feel I need. I would say that the best resource I had for all this stuff was Hudson's FTM Guide.

I'm glad that the standard is there. I do believe it's for those who are doing it for "fad" or because someone told them to do this. I think the challenge is because not all physicians can distinguish between the someone who really is a transsexed individual versus someone who doesn't really know and is doing this for the wrong reasons.

[The Oopster]

Originally Posted by Ebon

Did anyone go to the doctor and ask to be put on T without needing a letter from a therapist? If so did they just put you on T or did you have to do some tests first and wait for the results? Can the doctor say no is what I'm asking. Also did anyone have issues with hbp and was still able to take T?

Originally Posted by Thinker

Hey Ebon...

I started without a letter from a therapist. I had a letter in my possession, but the doctor never asked. That damn thing is still sitting...sealed......in a file folder.

I started with a guy in DC who had a lot of exposure to the MTF community there. I think he had gotten to the point where he was pretty comfortable making that decision for himself after a couple of visits with the patient.

I don't recall the specifics, but I am almost certain he went through a laundry list of labs before I started. I remember that I did not get my prescription until around my third or fourth visit; even then, I started on a very low dose of a transdermal patch. We both wanted to ease into it slowly since I have a history of migraines that were often triggered by hormonal changes. I started injections after about 3 months, I think.

I did not have a history of high blood pressure, but I did see changes once I started on T; it was high almost always. After about a year or so, that was no longer an issue.

A doctor can certainly say no. Finding a doc who, like mine, is very familiar with the trans community and our issues/obstacles with health care is pretty important.

Originally Posted by Ebon

Absolutely agree 100%! I have researched this other stuff and I do appreciate everyone's input, but I was looking for more of other people's experiences rather than information that I already had. Thinker (and now I know why you have that name) I am exactly the same way. I am in my body no one else is. This is my life I have to deal with any consequences of any decisions that I make. I have to walk my own path. I don't need someone else telling me when I am ready to do something and when I'm not. The only reason it's taken me this long is because of the whole going to a therapist that probably isn't even transgendered that is going to tell me if they think that I'm ready. I only recently found out that quite a few guys didn't even need to go to a therapist. The medical aspect I understand but when it comes to my emotions and my body it's up to me.

Thanks again everyone for your input.

Ebon

Originally Posted by Thinker

The EXACT same thing was true for me, Ebon.

I totally get that...and respect it.

You can do this your way; it's just a matter of finding the right doctor.

Originally Posted by Linus

It's funny. I didn't know that there was a Standard of Care or that WPATH existed until after I started to medically transition. I always thought that the Hippocratic Oath was enough but learned, as part of this process, that there is far more than just what I believe and feel I need. I would say that the best resource I had for all this stuff was Hudson's FTM Guide.

I'm glad that the standard is there. I do believe it's for those who are doing it for "fad" or because someone told them to do this. I think the challenge is because not all physicians can distinguish between the someone who really is a transsexed individual versus someone who doesn't really know and is doing this for the wrong reasons.

I was also hesitant about doing what I needed to take care of my body the way I saw fit and having it have to be approved by a therapist. I'm not against therapy. I have done therapy for areas of my life that needed it but by the time I was ready to make changes there was no need to brood it over with a therapist. However my path was slow. I used other avenues of support to come to my decisions. If anything I'm the type of person who needs a prod at doing something versus doing first and thinking second.

In fact I even feel life gave me the prodding. My T levels were low. So my normal physcian put me on the cream. I had other health issues and actually the higher my T level went on the cream the stronger I seemed to get. After a couple of years of this I was as high as the cream could go and be effective. At this point I already had 2 jobs that accepted me as male. Again another prodding by life. The first job my boss wondered, asked his therapist what he should do, and his therapist said to just ask me. From that point even though my government id still has the "F" my jobs have let me be Koop. The second job was funny because they started out calling me she, I rarely saw the people and it just wasn't worth going into but by the time I left everyone called me he. They figured it out. The only reason they called me she is they had seen my gov't id and knew. They realized all the clients didn't see my id so they didn't know and they called me he. In fact it's cool cause my id for that job has koop on it. It actually helped me get my mail at the post office. The guy was hesitant, and I said if you had this name, my birth name, would you want anyone else to know it? hence if somebody mails me something it's going to say Koop. "He said, you got a point, and let me sign for the package."

When it was time to go on the shots and to have my top surgery any of the drs I've seen just asked questions and could observe that I've been doing this for awhile and it's not a whim. I'm also in a recovery program and a lot of my self examination came through that program. If I wasn't i may have needed therapy. But I have changed in front of hundereds of people and again the professionals know that someone doesn't do that on a whim.

Now with that said there are drs here that are well established in the community that still expect that stuff, no exceptions. I chose not to go to those drs.

Now all the blood work and stuff I did have done and is monitored. That is important. It is also important to have it monitored by someone familar with ftm patients. My experience is everyone wants to blame every health issue that comes along with me on the T. Having a dr. who has dealt with lots of people I can get a proper assessment to whether that is a possibility or not.

[DapperButch]

Wow, Hudson's Guide has really expanded since I looked at it last! Yes, a great resource.

[J. Mason]

I am very glad this thread is around!

Now to get the ftm cock thread going!

[Ebon]

Anybody just felt like dropping and doing pushups when they started T?

[Liam]

Originally Posted by Ebon

Anybody just felt like doing push ups when they started T?

Yes, and climb mountains too!

[Ebon]

This is why I tried to go the natural way but it was taking too long. I have to go through all of this crap to align my body with my soul. Apparently the new standards of care don't mean shit.

[The Oopster]

Originally Posted by Ebon

Anybody just felt like dropping and doing pushups when they started T?

Actually since I've had my chest surgery if I walk past a mirror and don't have my shirt on I start doing sometype of resistance excercise ... can be push ups to pretend push ups to whatever.

[theoddz]

Originally Posted by Ebon

Anybody just felt like dropping and doing pushups when they started T?

I can't say that I ever really felt like dropping and cranking out a bunch of pushups, but I remember nearly constantly feeling like I needed to stretch. I'd wake up in the middle of the night and just need to stretch my entire body out. It'd actually wake me up out of a perfectly sound sleep.

One of my dear ex's, also a Southerner and full of "those sayings" we Southerners are so well known for coming up with, used to say this all the time:

"I'd stretch a mile if I didn't have to walk back."

Yep, that was exactly what it felt like.

~Theo~

[GPS]

Originally Posted by Ebon

This is why I tried to go the natural way but it was taking too long. I have to go through all of this crap to align my body with my soul. Apparently the new standards of care don't mean shit.

Its really hard doing the natural transitioning. you need to put your body first and in that instance you feel the slower end of the transition.

i have a very good friend that does it naturally for the most part, although he's finally on T. i think after top surgery you just seem to want to push forward and not feel "stuck" in that same routine.

good luck to you.

[1ladyface]

Originally Posted by GPS

Its really hard doing the natural transitioning. you need to put your body first and in that instance you feel the slower end of the transition.

i have a very good friend that does it naturally for the most part, although he's finally on T. i think after top surgery you just seem to want to push forward and not feel "stuck" in that same routine.

good luck to you.

Natural transitioning: Does that mean herbs and things that naturally increase testosterone rather than doing T shots? Apparently I have lot to learn. I'm gonna keep lurking this thread... Thanks for your openness all!

[Linus]

Originally Posted by 1ladyface

Natural transitioning: Does that mean herbs and things that naturally increase testosterone rather than doing T shots? Apparently I have lot to learn. I'm gonna keep lurking this thread... Thanks for your openness all!

Yes. There have been some blogs on how to do this and it's interesting but it's extremely slow and can only go so far. That said, there should be still caution as to the effect on the liver going this route and it should be done with medical guidance.

[Leigh]

Hey everyone,

I figured I would come in and talk to you guys about some stuff thats been on my mind for about 2-3 months now. I've been making some very serious life decisions and I've gotten to the point where I really have to do whats right for me and one of the biggest decisions I've made is to stop my transition from female to male and go back to being the female that I was before. I realize that taking hormones and transitioning is a HUGE deal and I just want everyone here to know that I never took that lightly when making my decision to even begin the process. I had *no* doubt in my mind that I even wanted to transition when I began and I'm not sorry that I did - I've learned alot about myself and have gotten in touch with my body in ways I never knew existed.

This hasn't been an easy decision and I have talked with My family and friends about it ....... they all say that as long as I am happy they still support me and I am sure I will receive support here too. I have a doctor's appointment next month in which I plan on talking to him about permanently stopping male hormones and seeing what I need to do about going back to my old female safe. I know that just as its a big decision to come out as FTM, its also a big deal when someone decides that they want to go back to who they were before but I'm just glad that I did not have any major surgeries before I made this decision. About three months ago I noticed that I was starting to not feel like a guy anymore - I didnt think much about it until I realized that this was an everyday thing.

I did hours upon hours of soul searching, talked to family and friends about it and came to the decision that I was never truly a guy in the first place - perhaps it was just my way of trying to find my place in the world. I've never taken any of this lightly as I said before and I have such a true appreciation for everything that a trans person goes through because its certainly not easy. I am always going to be a big supporter of the trans community and want all of you guys to know that I think of you like brothers - I thank you all for letting me be such a close part of this community, I will still be around as a trans supporter and friend no matter what

Each and everyone of you rawk big time!!!!

[Greyson]

Matthew, I respect your choice and candor. Being a "guy" looks different for everyone.

To give much thought and reflection to your transitioning or not, is part of the process. Best wishes to you Matthew.

Originally Posted by Matthew

Hey everyone,

I figured I would come in and talk to you guys about some stuff thats been on my mind for about 2-3 months now. I've been making some very serious life decisions and I've gotten to the point where I really have to do whats right for me and one of the biggest decisions I've made is to stop my transition from female to male and go back to being the female that I was before. I realize that taking hormones and transitioning is a HUGE deal and I just want everyone here to know that I never took that lightly when making my decision to even begin the process. I had *no* doubt in my mind that I even wanted to transition when I began and I'm not sorry that I did - I've learned alot about myself and have gotten in touch with my body in ways I never knew existed.

This hasn't been an easy decision and I have talked with My family and friends about it ....... they all say that as long as I am happy they still support me and I am sure I will receive support here too. I have a doctor's appointment next month in which I plan on talking to him about permanently stopping male hormones and seeing what I need to do about going back to my old female safe. I know that just as its a big decision to come out as FTM, its also a big deal when someone decides that they want to go back to who they were before but I'm just glad that I did not have any major surgeries before I made this decision. About three months ago I noticed that I was starting to not feel like a guy anymore - I didnt think much about it until I realized that this was an everyday thing.

I did hours upon hours of soul searching, talked to family and friends about it and came to the decision that I was never truly a guy in the first place - perhaps it was just my way of trying to find my place in the world. I've never taken any of this lightly as I said before and I have such a true appreciation for everything that a trans person goes through because its certainly not easy. I am always going to be a big supporter of the trans community and want all of you guys to know that I think of you like brothers - I thank you all for letting me be such a close part of this community, I will still be around as a trans supporter and friend no matter what

Each and everyone of you rawk big time!!!!

[Logicaly]

So the doctor decided to put me on niaspan for my cholesterol, but it turns out the prescription version of that is around $300 for someone with no health insurance. So instead I am taking over the counter Niacin in a slow release version, and let me tell you, the flushing, not fun. I looked like I had a gnarly sun burn on my face.

I am taking 500mg of it a day to start, and hoping that I can get myself off of it within 3 months. I've added a ton of natural cholesterol reducing items to my diet and am stepping up with the gym stuff so I don't have to keep taking niacin.

[ButchEire]

I guess i'm joining this group! I guess i'm also fortunate in that when girls in my high school were anticipating growing breasts, I was desperately wanting to grow facial hair. They got their wish and do did I,lol. I've been shaving since I was 16, with no supplemental hormones. In the 90's, in an attempt to "fit" into the butch mold better, I had three extensive electrolysis treatments, each months at a time, several times a week. The hair invariably came back and I much prefer having it than not.

[The Oopster]

Originally Posted by Logicaly

So the doctor decided to put me on niaspan for my cholesterol, but it turns out the prescription version of that is around $300 for someone with no health insurance. So instead I am taking over the counter Niacin in a slow release version, and let me tell you, the flushing, not fun. I looked like I had a gnarly sun burn on my face.

I am taking 500mg of it a day to start, and hoping that I can get myself off of it within 3 months. I've added a ton of natural cholesterol reducing items to my diet and am stepping up with the gym stuff so I don't have to keep taking niacin.

What type of T dose are you taking. I'm down to .25 ml every other week. There are times for endurance and muscle strength I'd like more but it helps keep some of my other negative effects at bay.

[Logicaly]

Originally Posted by The Oopster

What type of T dose are you taking. I'm down to .25 ml every other week. There are times for endurance and muscle strength I'd like more but it helps keep some of my other negative effects at bay.

I am taking 1ml every other week. The 26th of this month marks my 1 year for having been on T. I don't think its so much the T that is causing my cholesterol to be bad, in fact, I know its not. I really have no one to blame but myself. I've been struggling with this for a year, since I first started looking into taking T. I eat bad, I don't exercise like I should. I know that now that I am eating healthier and exercising that in 3 months I should be able to stop taking the niacin.

[Greyson]

Originally Posted by ButchEire

I guess i'm joining this group! I guess i'm also fortunate in that when girls in my high school were anticipating growing breasts, I was desperately wanting to grow facial hair. They got their wish and do did I,lol. I've been shaving since I was 16, with no supplemental hormones. In the 90's, in an attempt to "fit" into the butch mold better, I had three extensive electrolysis treatments, each months at a time, several times a week. The hair invariably came back and I much prefer having it than not.

Please do not take my post as a personal attack. It is not meant to correct or shame you. I do want to point out that the "Butch Mold" is varied. There are butches who prefer and have facial hair. Actually, I am aware of some "femmes" that are okay with having facial hair.

I know as a result of being part of the B-F online communities, I have evolved in my thinking of what is butch and what is femme. I do identify as a Transmasculine Butch. Meaning I was butch identified for most of my life then decided on transition. For me, besides the change in legal status as male, not much of my world view and how I experience it has changed. What has changed, sometimes, is how I am perceived and treated by others. AKA "Male Privledge." It can be both blantant and subtle.