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#561 |
Practically Lives Here
How Do You Identify?:
Butch (Silver Fox) Dom Daddi Preferred Pronoun?:
50 Shades of Clay Darker & Deeper Relationship Status:
married to my forever Join Date: May 2011
Location: salt air & sandy beaches
Posts: 13,136
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I am STILL laughing so hard over this....
My girl..is always, always such a lady! and I have never heard her utter one "curse word"...she is so classy like that... Tonight, we were chatting a bit on phone...and she was getting ready to get in bed....we were idly chatting...and all of a sudden..out of her mouth came: " I think I will take my happy ASS...then the sucking in of her breath...I could just visualize her mouth agape..eyes wide...and the shock of realizing what she just said.....dead silence...THEN....then we both burst out to laughing...and THAT was so precious....she NEVER utters any bad words..at alll.... ![]()
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To find someone who will love you for no reason, and to shower that person with reasons, that is the ultimate happiness. ~Robert Brault |
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#562 |
Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Fiery, Sassy, Tough As Nails, Femme Tomboy Preferred Pronoun?:
She Relationship Status:
I am your favorite hello and hardest goodbye. Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: NC & CO
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after an awful day at work... I needed to burn off steam... but first I stopped by Blade's because my landlord (I had to pay rent) lives just over the hill...so while there venting about my boss, he has me start looking for his lost keys.... MIND YOU, I wasn't here when he lost them, unlike times past when he misplaced his glasses...
So I look all over house while I grill him about "tell me your exact actions as you came home, dumped groceries and dealt with the plumber..." ..... He took a tone with me that made me repeat "Tell me EXACTLY what you did as you came in the door."... While half listening to him, I grabbed the flashlight to look under washer, dryer...then made my way out to the porch to check the squirrel cage... on my way back in, I glance over to above the steps... see a glint of light hit silver, make a very crosseyed look, then pound on the door and yell "GET YER BUTT OUT HERE!" .... He follows me back out, and I step off the porch, turn around and say "look THERE!!" ... pointing to an ammo box used for camp gear... The look on his face was PRICELESS... the keys were sitting in the rain, in a place he would HAVE NEVER LOOKED!! .... while he was checking to see if the auto button was ruined by the rain, he set off the truck alarm! So I get a finder's fee!! I was about to do a strip search, because I'd looked everywhere else!! Now I've climbed the "Helpful friend ladder" of always finding his glasses ... rescuing his lost keys... only bad thing is, I don't live here anymore to keep track of where he drops things! He laughed at me and said "now I owe you dinner!" I made him drive... before we left, I convinced him we were going to the Japanese Hibachi, but pay dutch because it's costly... On the way there, he argues with me that he "ain't going there if it costs too much"... My response: I've wanted to go there for a year, we're going! Even if I have to pay... We get there and get to watch the cutest, most adorable little boy sitting across the hibachi from us...when the chef lit oil on fire, he JUMPED and just about started to cry...then as chef started banging spatulas around, he was awestruck... later, he handled his chop sticks better than most adults...he'd gently dip each piece of chicken in the sauce, until he found a piece he wasn't convinced was chicken... so he picked it up with his chopstick, then used his other hand to pick it up to his nose, smell it, crinkle his nose...then drop it on his older cousin's plate! ... the cousin put it back on his plate.... we were CRACKING up watching this cute little guy, with his strawberry blonde hair and blue eyes... and all his funny reactions to the fancy chef... Blade tried my shrimp dumplings...and made an ugly face and said it tasted like "chit-lins"! Dinner and an entertaining show!! ... when I got the bill, I told Blade that was an early birthday gift... That little boy just made my day!! He sure took away the ugly feelings I had about my work day!
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She has been through hell, so believe me when I say, fear her when she looks into a fire and smiles. ~E.Corona~ |
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#563 |
Timed Out - Permanent
How Do You Identify?:
butch stone Preferred Pronoun?:
masculine ones work best... Relationship Status:
♥ engaged to spritz ♥ Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: bangor, maine
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What cracked me up today...
(At the convenience store before work) Me: I grabbed your last 9 fruit slice candies Clerk: Oh I see we found your weakness Me: *smiles* Yes you have! *straight face* Now move them... Clerk: Okay. Around the corner, top shelf Me: *smiles* Clerk: Now to actually order more Me: Ugh Cracked us both up... Me: ![]() ![]() |
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#564 |
Timed Out - TOS Drama
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... Preferred Pronoun?:
... Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: ...
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Remembering a favorite movie!
Cracks me up every single time! ![]() |
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#565 |
Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
Biological female. Lesbian. Relationship Status:
Happy ![]() Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Hanging out in the Atlantic.
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Thanked 34,632 Times in 7,640 Posts
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The complete list includes:
Toad Suck, Arkansas Climax, Georgia Boring, Oregon and Maryland Hooker, Oklahoma Assawoman, Maryland Belchertown, Massachusetts Roachtown, Illinois Loveladies, New Jersey Squabbletown, California Monkey’s Eyebrow, Kentucky Chicken, Alaska http://newsfeed.time.com/2012/08/08/...ticle-mostpop1
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#566 |
Timed Out - Permanent
How Do You Identify?:
butch stone Preferred Pronoun?:
masculine ones work best... Relationship Status:
♥ engaged to spritz ♥ Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: bangor, maine
Posts: 3,344
Thanks: 20,720
Thanked 16,492 Times in 2,972 Posts
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What cracked me up... (technicaly it was last night)
Three kids at the shelter playing "would you rather" PG style! Some of the things debated on were hilarious... ![]() |
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#567 |
Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
femme Relationship Status:
attached Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: .
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Thanked 13,094 Times in 3,386 Posts
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#568 |
Member
How Do You Identify?:
Femme Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Virginia
Posts: 242
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Thanked 813 Times in 169 Posts
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My co-worker cracked me up yesterday. I was waiting on lab results for twin girls. I knew my co-worker would get them first since she gets all the hospital lab results since to her. After about 30 mins she comes to me as I'm standing at my desk and says "I found your Balls". I busted out laughing and said "Thanks, I wondered where I left them". She in turns bust out laughing realizing what she had just said. The patients last name was Ball. It was one of those "you had to be there moments". LoL
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#569 |
Member
How Do You Identify?:
DONE Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: forever away
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a 65 year old woman and myself... from 2 hick towns in the south... sounding like old country family.... people thought we were nuts... that was funny as hell...
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Don't get mad when a girl cares too much. Worry when they start to not give a fuck. |
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#570 |
Infamous Member
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femme Preferred Pronoun?:
she Relationship Status:
Married Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: rose cottage
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a sex toy party with a bunch of big women...lol...
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Pole bachit, a lis chuye.
The field sees, the forest hears |
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#571 |
Timed Out - Permanent
How Do You Identify?:
butch stone Preferred Pronoun?:
masculine ones work best... Relationship Status:
♥ engaged to spritz ♥ Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: bangor, maine
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OMG this reminds me of a Women's Studies Women's Sexuality class I had one semester a few years back where at the end we had a closing out party. Two of the students worked for two different sex toy companies. So we had dueling of the sex toys to see who had the better goods and sales pitch... Being the ONLY butch , well the only lesbian at all in the room was hilarious. Hell, it was hilarious all semester long but THAT day was priceless!!
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#572 |
Just a guy.
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Just a guy Preferred Pronoun?:
male Relationship Status:
Sparkle's consort Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: MA
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Two things today--
Playing the duck ringtone on my iPhone and watching my dog (a Lab mix) go over to the big picture window in the livingroom to scan for waterfowl. Cracks me up every time. Second, the episode in Season 4 of Californication where Hank goes golfing with the two lawyers. Hysterical. |
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#573 |
Member
How Do You Identify?:
Femme Preferred Pronoun?:
feminine ones Relationship Status:
Single and social! Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: San Francisco
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My friend is a cop. He was on traffic duty this morning. I saw him parked across the street ready to pounce on red-light runners so when my light turned green I held my cell phone up and pretended to be dialing as I crossed thru the intersection right in front of him. He had to pull me over. Lights and everything. I was cracking up. No, I did not get a ticket.
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http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/...rik9yeyjcd.jpg We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are. ~ Anais Nin |
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#574 |
Junior Member
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femme Relationship Status:
single Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: NY
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my two gay guy friends i work with, excited about taking my picture for this site!
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#575 |
Member
How Do You Identify?:
submissive femme Preferred Pronoun?:
She Relationship Status:
moving forward and not looking back... anything is possible! Join Date: May 2012
Location: Pennsylvania
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A friend of mine, who has recently gone "country" decided to buy herself a pig. So, off to the livestock auction we went, down into Amish country. She bought a small pig and a farmer friend of ours, bought 5 small pigs (he agreed to allow her to room her pig with his, on the farm).... and off to the farm we went to help unload the next "porkchop on her plate". My god daughter, god son and I watched, at first in bemusement and then in absolute hysterics as my friend chased those darned things around the trailer, trying to grab them by their hind legs. I've not laughed that hard in a long time. She got peed on, got pig crap on her boots, she was exhausted when all six were finally penned, but she was happy. Me, Danni and TT were exhausted from laughing. lol.
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~Love is a verb~ |
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#576 | |
Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
Lesbian non-stone femme Preferred Pronoun?:
She, her Relationship Status:
Committed to being good to myself Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: West Coast
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~Anya~ ![]() Democracy Dies in Darkness ~Washington Post "...I'm deeply concerned by recently adopted policies which punish children for their parents’ actions ... The thought that any State would seek to deter parents by inflicting such abuse on children is unconscionable." UN Human Rights commissioner |
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#577 |
Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Fiery, Sassy, Tough As Nails, Femme Tomboy Preferred Pronoun?:
She Relationship Status:
I am your favorite hello and hardest goodbye. Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: NC & CO
Posts: 4,806
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Thanked 12,194 Times in 3,779 Posts
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my car repair bill...and estimate for other work that still needs done...
Yep, I felt like a hard boiled egg that someone had just taken a hammer to! Cracked me up indeed... that life seems to be so full of surprises and twist-n-turns...
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She has been through hell, so believe me when I say, fear her when she looks into a fire and smiles. ~E.Corona~ |
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#578 |
Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Fiery, Sassy, Tough As Nails, Femme Tomboy Preferred Pronoun?:
She Relationship Status:
I am your favorite hello and hardest goodbye. Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: NC & CO
Posts: 4,806
Thanks: 4,624
Thanked 12,194 Times in 3,779 Posts
Rep Power: 21474856 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
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Blade's dad, who's having surgery today, took the Superman PJ's with him that I gave him for his birthday, so he can wear them in recovery.
that ornery old fart always finds ways to crack me up! Blade made me laugh when he said "if they ever let me leave,.I'll bring you Piggy Park BBQ!!"
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She has been through hell, so believe me when I say, fear her when she looks into a fire and smiles. ~E.Corona~ |
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#579 |
Member
How Do You Identify?:
DONE Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: forever away
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Thanked 3,880 Times in 1,025 Posts
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what was funny... was me (45) and norma (65) worked circles around a kid (21).
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Don't get mad when a girl cares too much. Worry when they start to not give a fuck. |
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#580 |
Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
cleverly disguised as a responsible adult* Preferred Pronoun?:
wild woman Relationship Status:
No, thank you. Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Home in NC..gonna dig in like a tick this time…
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my mother's pit bull is 4 months old now....all gangly legs and big head....she doesnt realize shes as big as she is....she looks like a young great dane! Anyhow....she doesnt like to come inside..she LOVES being in the yard...so I was calling her to come in....and in the meantime let the other dogs in...when i opened the door again to let her in, she BOLTED from the holly bush that is her "den" to the shed about 25 ft away...the way she did it was like she thought she was hiding from me....like shes still small enough to hide...i had to laugh....i closed the door and let her stay out....its still making me smile
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