Corny jokes

Mopsie · 08-04-2013, 07:10 AM

I work in mental health. My part time job is at a group home. One of the residents loves corny jokes. Everytime I come to work she has a new one to tell me. Then I tell her a corny joke back. I have now exhausted my knowledge of corny jokes. I know I could just google corny jokes but I thought a thread would be more fun!

So what are the corny jokes you know?

Mopsie · 08-04-2013, 07:14 AM

Here's a joke she told me yesterday:

There are two potatoes standing on a street corner.

How do you know which one is the prostitute?

Answer: The one wearing the sign "Idaho."

Wrang1er · 08-04-2013, 07:42 AM

You stay here. I'll go on a head.

Gaige · 08-04-2013, 07:45 AM

What’s Irish and stays out all night?

Pati-o furniture :-p

Hollylane · 08-04-2013, 09:14 AM

What does a mermaid wear to math class?

An algae-bra.

Cin · 08-04-2013, 10:57 AM

How do you make holy water?

You boil the hell out of it.

always2late · 08-04-2013, 11:35 AM

Two french fries were walking down the road, and one was a-salted.

Mopsie · 08-10-2013, 07:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wrang1er

You stay here. I'll go on a head.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gaige

What’s Irish and stays out all night?

Pati-o furniture :-p

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hollylane

What does a mermaid wear to math class?

An algae-bra.

I worked at my part time job last night. I told my client the first three jokes from this thread. She loved them! She laughed so hard I thought she was going to spit out her meds.

Thanks for all the jokes everybody - keep them coming!

Wrang1er · 08-10-2013, 07:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mopsie

I worked at my part time job last night. I told my client the first three jokes from this thread. She loved them! She laughed so hard I thought she was going to spit out her meds.

Thanks for all the jokes everybody - keep them coming!

Mopsie - knowing that makes this even better.

Thanks for sharing.

VintageFemme · 08-04-2013, 01:41 PM

How do you catch a unique rabbit?

U nique up on it.

How do you catch a tame rabbit?

Tame way.

Wrang1er · 08-04-2013, 02:27 PM

What did the mother buffalo say when her boy went off to college?

Bison!

Wrang1er · 08-04-2013, 02:31 PM

How much does a pirate pay for corn?

A buccaneer.

stargazingboi · 08-04-2013, 03:17 PM

What did one toilet say to the other toilet?

~You look flushed

Mopsie · 08-04-2013, 03:32 PM

Q: What do you call a pig who takes karate lessons?

A: Pork chop!

(Said with appropriate accompanying hand gestures ... which made it cuter.)

nycfem · 08-06-2013, 11:33 AM

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Why the long face?"

Blade · 08-09-2013, 04:22 PM

what do you call a camel without any humps?

Humphrey

JustLovelyJenn · 06-08-2014, 11:01 AM

gotoseagrl · 06-08-2014, 02:39 PM

Patient: Doctor, I think I need glasses!
Waiter: You certainly do, this is a restaurant!

Patient: Doctor, I feel like a pony!
Doctor: Don't worry, you're just a little hoarse!

Happy_Go_Lucky · 06-08-2014, 04:38 PM

Happy_Go_Lucky · 06-09-2014, 05:25 AM

08-04-2013, 07:10 AM	#1
Mopsie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Female ones Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Mar 2013 Location: Shenandoah Valley Virginia Posts: 4,769 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 36,246 Thanked 8,551 Times in 1,856 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Corny jokes I work in mental health. My part time job is at a group home. One of the residents loves corny jokes. Everytime I come to work she has a new one to tell me. Then I tell her a corny joke back. I have now exhausted my knowledge of corny jokes. I know I could just google corny jokes but I thought a thread would be more fun! So what are the corny jokes you know?

08-04-2013, 07:42 AM	#3
Wrang1er Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Me, myself and I Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Here Posts: 1,526 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 6,112 Thanked 7,043 Times in 1,354 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	What did one hat say to the other hat? You stay here. I'll go on a head.

08-04-2013, 09:14 AM	#5
Hollylane Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: . Preferred Pronoun?: . Relationship Status: . Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: . Posts: 11,495 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 34,694 Thanked 26,362 Times in 5,875 Posts Rep Power: 21474862	Cute/fun thread Mopsie! :) What does a mermaid wear to math class? An algae-bra.

08-04-2013, 11:35 AM	#7
always2late Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: m'lady Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: NJ Posts: 2,000 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,834 Thanked 6,231 Times in 1,462 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Two french fries were walking down the road, and one was a-salted. __________________ Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing there is a field. I'll meet you there ~ Rumi

08-04-2013, 01:41 PM	#10
VintageFemme Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: Outside Posts: 2,299 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,828 Thanked 7,620 Times in 1,655 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	=) How do you catch a unique rabbit? U nique up on it. How do you catch a tame rabbit? Tame way. __________________ Unfinished Business & Open to Serendipity

08-04-2013, 07:14 AM	#2
Mopsie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Female ones Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Mar 2013 Location: Shenandoah Valley Virginia Posts: 4,769 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 36,246 Thanked 8,551 Times in 1,856 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Here's a joke she told me yesterday: There are two potatoes standing on a street corner. How do you know which one is the prostitute? Answer: The one wearing the sign "Idaho."

08-04-2013, 07:45 AM	#4
Gaige Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Stone Butch Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: above my boots Posts: 2,097 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,649 Thanked 3,755 Times in 1,171 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	What’s Irish and stays out all night? Pati-o furniture :-p

08-04-2013, 10:57 AM	#6
Cin Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Butch Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: Truly Madly Deeply Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: In My Head Posts: 2,815 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 6,333 Thanked 10,401 Times in 2,477 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.

08-04-2013, 02:27 PM	#11
Wrang1er Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Me, myself and I Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Here Posts: 1,526 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 6,112 Thanked 7,043 Times in 1,354 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	What did the mother buffalo say when her boy went off to college? Bison!

08-04-2013, 02:31 PM	#12
Wrang1er Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Me, myself and I Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Here Posts: 1,526 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 6,112 Thanked 7,043 Times in 1,354 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	How much does a pirate pay for corn? A buccaneer.

08-04-2013, 03:17 PM	#13
stargazingboi Senior Member How Do You Identify?: ~ Preferred Pronoun?: ~ Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: ~ Posts: 1,954 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 10,392 Thanked 8,318 Times in 1,626 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	What did one toilet say to the other toilet? ~You look flushed

08-04-2013, 03:32 PM	#14
Mopsie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Female ones Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Mar 2013 Location: Shenandoah Valley Virginia Posts: 4,769 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 36,246 Thanked 8,551 Times in 1,856 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Here's another one my client told me last week ... Q: What do you call a pig who takes karate lessons? A: Pork chop! (Said with appropriate accompanying hand gestures ... which made it cuter.)

08-06-2013, 11:33 AM	#15
nycfem Moderator How Do You Identify?: femme sub Preferred Pronoun?: Baby Grrl Relationship Status: Attached Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: NYC Posts: 6,795 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 52,988 Thanked 21,426 Times in 5,101 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" __________________ *** How do I... ?** Check out the Members Helping Members thread: http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/foru...embers+Helping

08-09-2013, 04:22 PM	#16
Blade Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: TG Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: once in a while someone amazing comes along...and here I am! Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Down on the farm Posts: 5,501 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,855 Thanked 14,412 Times in 4,058 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	what do you call a camel without any humps? Humphrey __________________ Yeah so what if I'm triple dipped in awesome sauce? The best way to predict the future, is to create it.

06-08-2014, 11:01 AM	#17
JustLovelyJenn Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She/her Relationship Status: That's Need to Know Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Aberdeen, WA Posts: 4,478 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 12,464 Thanked 13,991 Times in 3,684 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	__________________ --Jenn

06-08-2014, 02:39 PM	#18
gotoseagrl Senior Member How Do You Identify?: old-fashioned queer stone submissive girl Preferred Pronoun?: mermaid, very lucky babygirl Relationship Status: Saltwater mermaid ♡ Join Date: May 2010 Location: CA Posts: 2,209 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,192 Thanked 6,103 Times in 1,727 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Patient: Doctor, I think I need glasses! Waiter: You certainly do, this is a restaurant! Patient: Doctor, I feel like a pony! Doctor: Don't worry, you're just a little hoarse! __________________ Be still when you have nothing to say; when genuine passion moves you, say what you've got to say, and say it hot. D. H. Lawrence

06-08-2014, 04:38 PM	#19
Happy_Go_Lucky Member How Do You Identify?: OFOS Butch who desires femme company. Preferred Pronoun?: Handsome devil you. Join Date: Nov 2012 Location: Anywhere I want to be Posts: 677 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,203 Thanked 3,365 Times in 627 Posts Rep Power: 21474849	__________________ Hair Pulling...... not just for preschoolers.

06-09-2014, 05:25 AM	#20
Happy_Go_Lucky Member How Do You Identify?: OFOS Butch who desires femme company. Preferred Pronoun?: Handsome devil you. Join Date: Nov 2012 Location: Anywhere I want to be Posts: 677 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,203 Thanked 3,365 Times in 627 Posts Rep Power: 21474849	__________________ Hair Pulling...... not just for preschoolers.