What are your life basics?

[imperfect_cupcake]

Some people need to be in an own house with lots of land, some people need dogs, some people need to be physically close to family, some people need to travel.

Aside from Maslow's hierarchy of need - which ever human need the basics of (food, shelter, heat, safety... Please see here http://convene.com/wp-content/upload...chyofNeeds.png if you have no idea what I'm talking about...

But after the basics of human survival are met, we all have different *personality* based needs that we have tried doing without and just can't.

What are yours?

I'll start will mine for example...

~ I need to be in an urban space, with lots of shops, good grocers, restaurants and cafes, and community events.

~ I need my friends to be in my neighbourhood, so if I move to a new city and as I make friends I will move to the neighbourhood in which most of them are.

~ I need to be constantly learning. My brain needs to be busy. So I will always be signed up for one course or another.

~ I need easy sociability (see urban and local friends) - I need daily contact with people and I need it to be easy.

~ I need cats

~ I need my own space. Badly. I may be an extrovert but I need my private me space that is wholey mine, only mine and where in I can ask people to leave or invite people in. Where I don't have to have discussions about what goes on in them or what I do with it.

~ If I absolutely positively *have* to live with a partner I will need a large bedroom (something that can be made into a bed-sitting room) with my own bathroom attached. And there will have to be a house cleaner. There might be the odd day I do not come out of my own space. And that's gonna have to be ok. If my partner wants company, they have to have friends they can ask for company and be happy with. Some days I just need to be on my own.

~ I need queer friends, not just straight ones. I need butch and trans* friends not just femme ones.

~ I need independence. I'm not fond of answering to people (even though I prefer my partner to "be the boss" that has fairly tight limitations lol) I even get arsey with my mom if she gets too "fussy" or controlling for my comfort. I'm good with taking care of my own needs, so when I'm questioned in certain ways, I can get spikey. This is always why some employment and I don't get along. I HATE micromanagement of any sort and will mentally drive tent pegs through someone's eyes if I feel micromanaged.

~ I do need green space that isn't over crowded. So being 10/15 minute walking distance to a park or beach that doesn't get jammed with people.

~ ideally, I'd love to have a car. I'm not sure I can be arsed. I live next to the sky train and have a bike. I might opt for a scooter. Less hassle.

[clay]

I will answer later...thanks for making me "think harder" and see more than B/W views!

[C0LLETTE]

I need pretty much what I_c needs except for the cat, separate bathroom ensuite, and I can be "arsed" about my car. However, in addition, I need someone to help me figure out how to get those things and not compromise on them cause that's where most of my anxieties and guilt feelings root. So, I guess I'd add a really really good psychotherapist.

[cricket26]

i am a simple person with simple needs...

food, shelter, clothing, some sort of work that makes me feel like i have accomplished something everyday, a way to get to that work, and human contact...however much or little life affords me

[homoe]

I lead a simple life as well! Of course the two materialistic items I need would be books and movies!

[imperfect_cupcake]

That's pretty cool. I can survive just about anywhere, but to be happy, relaxed, content and at my best I've learned I'm not as simple as I thought I was. For example, I've learned:

I can't live in the booneys or suburbs and not get depressed.

I definitely can't live with more than two other people and I really do need my own room, not share a house with others *and* share a bedroom with a partner.

I can't live so far from green space that I can't take a break...

I have learned that I'm OK with not living near my family, but I do need to be near friends

Surely people have learned other life basics for happiness?

[Uli]

I think the things I need for happiness can vary greatly based on life circumstance, but here's what I've got off the top of my head:

-good coffee (and this is not a random order list) - I use coffee to manage my mental health, at times. I find peace in my coffee making rituals. The first sip of hot coffee in the morning makes me happy to be awake and alive. I am unhappy and actively using coping skills if I am financially in a position to have to drink pre-ground coffee rather than whole bean.

-furry friends - i'm sure i would be sad and bored all the time without at least one pet to babble at and snuggle with

-a functional kitchen with enough counter space on which to knead bread dough by hand - making bread is my version of prayer or meditation

-quiet time away from other human for at least a little while everyday

-someone smart and interesting to talk to for at least a little while almost every day

-meaningful physical contact - i can cope without this for lengths of time, but i find i'm much more emotionally stable if i can,at least, melt fully into a good hug relatively often

[flapdoodle]

I can go on and on about the word "need" yada yada, but will go with it instead.

I need my own life, aside from my friends and J (my hubby), this includes thoughts, interests, spiritual/religious beliefs, hobbies, and so on

I need art supplies and all of my own forms of expression.

I need to be me, I cannot live in a closet or in an area where i feel I must hide.

I need to feel understood even if you disagree.
I need a king size bed, I need pictures of the past, I need the love of friends and family.
I need to learn as often and as much as I can.
I need to be kind, understanding and everything I want in return.
I need my morals and ethics.
I need my Past.
I need my animals
I need my "J"

[MsTinkerbelly]

I need to feel secure; Secure in my home, my marriage...Secure in my role as mother, sister, wife, friend.
Losing the ability to do meaningful work nearly made me lose my mind, but I've been able to substitute Church activities, housework, and e-bay sales for my need to be productive and not a burden.
I need quiet time alone every day
I need the mountains around me
I need good books to stimulate my mind
I need to be listened to, and not have my problems solved
I need laughter...big heaping doses of laughter.
I need to be silly, crazy, loving, nurturing, needed, wanted, loved.... I need to be first in someone's life.

[Martina]

My friends
My cats
Books, TV, Art, Music
A sense of purpose -- that I am making a difference
Occasional opportunities for fun
Some physical pleasure of some kind
Being near the ocean
Being around people with progressive politics -- really important
Quiet time and my own space
Bacon

[Shystonefem]

Wow, great question.

I need my animals and to always have animals around.

I need to live in a place that is semi-rural yet close to water and a city... preferably a place on the water that is fairly close to a city.

I need time to myself for meditation, etc.

If I am coupled, I need that person to respect me and I would do the same.

I need to read, write and learn.

I need to live in a peaceful environment, without stress inside the home.

I need to have close friends that I trust.

[princessbelle]

I also believe "need" and "want" are way different, but i'll join in and think of it more in a "want" way.

Love. Unconditional, from family, friends.
Security. Feeling safe and out of harms way.
To feel needed. Helping people that reach out or those that can't but should.
Laughter. A day without laughing is a day wasted.
Sunshine. It warms my bones and my spirit.
Acceptance. To be who i am from my friends without judgement or prejudice.
Independence. Some of the time.
Quiet time. To think thoughts through, especially early in the day or when something is on my mind.
Understanding. That i goof up. I make mistakes. But, hey, we all do.

Last, but certainly not least, and something that has been on my mind more and more the past few months.....

Community. Without community i feel isolated, alone and strange in a foreign land where no one really understands my heart. (thank you planet)

[imperfect_cupcake]

Sorry. I meant like stated in the OP with Maslow's "hierarchy of needs". Taking out the bottom level. The link is up there if it's helpful for clarification on the word use of "need"? :/

[JDeere]

Food, water, shelter and clothes. But also friends and family. I try not too think too hard on things and keep it simple. Want and need are two different things for me. I will never get what i want but will almost certainly have what I need.

[clay]

~I need arts &crafts supplies and space ~~I need quiet time/space of my own daily....and am afforded that regularly. ~~I need my furbaby. She is a huge part of me and my world........for 10 years. ~~I need to view and enjoy the ocean regularly and seeing my dolphins! ~~I need social time with a select group of trusted friends. ~~I need social time for my most intimate of friends on this Planet! I love them each uniquely. ~~~I need my smudging rituals to cleanse my space and myself. ~~~I need my beloved crystals and healing stones, and my salt rock lamp. ~~I need my incense burns daily. ~~~I need, and do humbly appreciate my life, health, and wonderful partner all the time. ~~~I need to share my love for my very closest chosen family and friends often!

[imperfect_cupcake]

For those not clear about what I mean and you think I'm confusing wants with needs.... Ok sorry. I'll try again but I'll make sure I put the picture here:



(Edit to add: won't let me put an image in so I'm afraid you'll have to actually click it and look at it)

This is what I linked to. This is Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs.

I'm sayin' aside from the bottom layer oF listed physiological needs, HOW or WHAT things bring you the rest of your (as *Maslow* defines "needs") needs? How or what makes you content and happy, not just surviving. Like I'd never be content and happy living in a cement mixer even though it would keep the rain off me. I need to live where I have control over my own personal space or I get stressed out.

Thank you For your patience.

I've made a pigs ear of this thread, trying to articulate. But I hope I've done a better job now.

[imperfect_cupcake]

Originally Posted by clay

~I need arts &crafts supplies and space ~~I need quiet time/space of my own daily....and am afforded that regularly. ~~I need my furbaby. She is a huge part of me and my world........for 10 years. ~~I need to view and enjoy the ocean regularly and seeing my dolphins! ~~I need social time with a select group of trusted friends. ~~I need social time for my most intimate of friends on this Planet! I love them each uniquely. ~~~I need my smudging rituals to cleanse my space and myself. ~~~I need my beloved crystals and healing stones, and my salt rock lamp. ~~I need my incense burns daily. ~~~I need, and do humbly appreciate my life, health, and wonderful partner all the time. ~~~I need to share my love for my very closest chosen family and friends often!

Thank you clay!

[clay]

you are so very welcome!

[MsTinkerbelly]

I thought i got it, but i guess not.

Sorry!

[Miss Scarlett]

Our warm, loving home.

Shoes on my feet and clothes on my back.

Healthy food in our kitchen.

Our furbabies.

Our families and friends.

My job.

Laughter.

Our love and the mutual respect we have for each other.

As far as I'm concerned, anything else is a bonus.