Pityphuck and Michfest 2014

[vagina]

Twas a wonderful year for Michigan Womyn's Festival here in 2014. Thanks to Happy_Go_Lucky for inviting dear vagina to accompany her to the Festival.

Being a Festie Firstie I was not sure what to expect. I had attended many other festivals in the past, especially attending BurningMan 3 years in a row. However, I would never imagine what it would be like to attend a festival that is all for women by women. All the stages and building is done by women. And only women are invited to attend.

It was beautiful to see so many lesbians, Femme/Butch couples and other women together celebrating sisterhood for 1 week. The festival provided entertainment in the forms of comedy, singing, dancing and poetry. Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner was provided... and there were multiple workshops going on all day.

My impression of the festival is beyond what words could possibly describe. The atmosphere was thick with so much woman centered sexuality, even dear vagina got a pityphuck during the festival. Please welcome our dear sister FemmeSinceThursday.

[Happy_Go_Lucky]

[vagina]

[pajama]

I haven't attended in several years. But have been to many other music festivals over those years. And I agree....there is nothing compares to the power, peace, joy, that is MichFest. Glad you enjoyed it!

[Soon]

Sounds like an amazing experience! Thought I'd pass along a great blog post (http://bmgnedra.wordpress.com) I came across articulating the value of this festival for so many women:

I VALUE SEPARATE SPACES…

I value separate spaces of many kinds. I have participated in lesbian only, People of Color only, Women of Color only, black women only, black lesbian only, all women only, Womyn Born Female only. I get something different from each. I don’t particularly value queer space, but I don’t begrudge those who do taking it. For me “queer” tends to mean anyone at least half-way freaky deaky (like kinky straight folks think of themselves as “queer” now). It doesn’t speak to me as a lesbian at all. I think we, meaning lesbians, get lost in the LGBT alphabet soup. But that’s me. I think there is value in coming together occasionally or even regularly if that is what works for you. I just tend to find “inclusive” by way of “queer” doesn’t always mean the concerns of women will be addressed. For me this goes back as far as Queer Nation in NYC in the early 90’s. The issues being addressed were very white gay male focused. It’s part of why some of us women broke off and started Dyke Action Machine.

I value Womyn Born Female space because my life is informed by the fact that I was born female. It’s not just informed by my identity as a woman, but also by my female body. I did not understand that until I was in what was consciously determined Womyn Born Womyn space. (I prefer to use WBF over WBW, because I think it is more accurately spoken that way, as in “Womyn [gender, which is socially constructed] Born Female [sex, physical body]“)

I first learned about Michigan in 1986. And I learned in that first conversation about it that it was “Womyn Born Womyn” space. I had never heard the term before. The specificity struck me and the friend I was with… we both responded like “daaaaaaaaaaayum.” And I can’t say that, at the time, I responded that way because it sounded offensive or transphobic. I’d never even heard the word transphobic before. It was more that whoever put this gathering together consciously narrowed it down like that. Damn.

My first festival was in 1989. And because I understood it to be Womyn Born Female space I was conscious to consider why that might be meaningful to me. But many things struck me that I didn’t have to even think too much about. I was so impressed with everything about the festival. The production quality was amazing. It was as good as or better than any big concerts I had been to in my life. And I was more than impressed. I was SURPRISED. And I remember stopping myself and asking, “Why am I surprised?”

If anyone had asked me if I thought women/girls could do anything men/boys could do, I would have answered without hesitation “YES!” I had been fighting “girls can’t” my whole life. I literally had “girls can’t” said to me everyday of my childhood. Girls can’t play football, basketball, baseball, climb trees, play with trucks, throw a ball, do math, be good at science, take and be good at shop, play guitar… I mean on and on. And I fought it everyday. “But I am PLAYING football, therefore girls CAN play football.” I mean, seriously daily.

So I really thought I BELIEVED that girls could do anything. But what I found out was that some of that stuff had gotten under my skin and into my head and my beliefs about myself and other females. I realized that when I heard recorded music, even if the band was all women, I had some idea that if there was a guitar solo, a guy probably did that. And like I saw the stages and big tents and the sound booth and the lighting at Michigan and I imagined that guys had come and put that together. I had no idea prior to Michigan that I really thought that way. And so Michigan made me really understand that I had so much healing to do around what it means to be female and what I went through growing up, BECAUSE I am female. I realized I had internalized the messages “girls can’t” and the reflections in media and culture that inform our sense of possibilities and limitations and was applying those beliefs in my life totally without being conscious about it.

- – – – -

Sort of as a related aside, one time when I was in my late teens and living with my father, his mother, my grandmother came to visit. Gram was an opininated matriach for sure. And she had a real thing about hair. She was a hairdresser. And, because of racism, she had really internalized the idea that since we had the technology to straighten our hair as black women, we should. Straight hair is beautiful and good. Nappy hair is not. She could deal with natural hair on some level, but it had to be very well kempt and definitely not braids (dreadlocks, totally nothing she could even imagine). I was wearing my hair then similar to the way I wear it now when it’s out and that is kind of wild and curly. So one day while Gram was visiting she sighed and said to me…”I’m going to tell you something…cause I love you.” I knew to brace myself, because surely something weighted was coming. Then she said, “You used to be pretty…” And I was like, “Daaaag Gram. This is about my hair?” And she nodded. So I replied, “A lot of people like my hair.” And it was true that I did get a lot of compliments on it. But she held strong to her opinion. “They are lying to you. I’m telling you the truth, because I love you.” I was able to redirect the conversation, responding with the hook of a Louis Jordan tune we had been listening to by singing, “But I’ll die happy.” We laughed it off and I went and had my day. But later that night I was lying in my bed and I thought to myself clear as if I said it out loud, “Wow. That’s fucked up my friends lie to me.” And I shook and shocked myself thinking that, because it did get to me. IT. GOT. TO. ME! And that is a parallel experience to how all the messages get to us as girls even when we were girls who thought we were actively resisting those messages.

- – – – -

There are so many limitations and expectations forced on us. For some women perhaps all of that works with their natures. But for those of us that it doesn’t, its quite brutal. I am a woman with a low voice. And I grew up being made fun of because of it. And I learned to speak higher to avoid getting shit for my voice. That is something I have been able to heal in part, because of Michigan. Judith Casselberry, Edwina Lee Tyler, Alexis P. Suter, Ubaka Hill, Maxine Feldman and more… I’m not the only one!

At Michigan, I learned that women can be quite hairy. I am not really hairy at all. But it was very meaningful to see women fiercely rocking beards and hairy legs. And I imagined for years that they just let themselves go for fest. I had no idea that they were so daring as to present like that out in the world. Like, what is natural for women, is unacceptable socially. We are so guided and forced into standards of beauty that are impossible for most of us. And at Michigan I saw women defying the status quo of gendered expectations and defining “woman” by finding, healing and being themselves, as opposed to allowing “woman,” as it is socially constructed and understood in mainstream society, to define them.

And we tend to be trained from childhood… from babies really to protect ourselves… our virtues… we begin learning (many, maybe most of us) as babies to “sit like ladies”… with our legs closed. This is not just manners. It’s preparing us to appear less inviting… less available for unwanted sexual advances. We don’t learn to know rapists in such a way that our instincts are honed to detect their identities as rapists. The best we can do is to understand that men and boys (who we understand as anyone male) are all potential violators. We need to be careful… don’t walk down certain streets, don’t stay out late… don’t get too drunk, never go out alone… women guess and try so hard to avoid assault and yet 1 in 5 in the U.S. have been sexually assaulted. And 90 something percent of the time sexual assault of females is at the hand of males. So our instincts are honed to know, as best we can, when we are in the presence of males. I think this is both nature and nurture. It’s quite animal really to know sex this way.

I didn’t know until Michigan how ON I was all the time. Like, I think probably most women who go there for the first time end up a few days in suddenly realizing they are not afraid. Like, there are no males there. That survival instinct that kicks in everywhere else and is conscious of males in our presence doesn’t get triggered… even though there are bearded and sometimes very butch women. THAT thing does not get tripped off in WBF space. And it’s such a relief. And I mean that it is one I would not have expected. Because when I realized I was not afraid is when I realized I am normally afraid all the time. It was the absence of that fear that made me realize I had it in the first place. Its a profound realization. It was for me anyway. It’s like carrying a huge pack of rocks on your back and it being there so long you don’t even realize you are carrying it. And then someone says “hey… you can put that down now.” And you don’t even know what they are talking about. And then when you actually take it off… you can’t believe how big and heavy it was… you can’t believe it was just your normal.

I understand that many people cannot process the idea of me considering myself a trans ally when I also say that I value WBF space. I feel like if I were to deny that I find value in it when I do in order to not hurt feelings or to avoid being framed as transphobic, THAT would actually be transphobic. Not all WBF want or need WBF space. I do. Many others do. It is our healing space. The value we find in it is not about the hatred of anyone not intended to be there. I can be a better ally and show up to support inclusive events when I am more whole and healed myself.

People, anyone really… but especially oppressed classes of people, have a right and responsibility to create healing spaces as they need toward their healing. I believe in the healing powers of separatist spaces. I believe in them because I know they have been a part of my own healing. And I feel so strongly about them that I think the only people who have a right to change the intention of a given space are those intended. And for those I am included in, I would vote to hold as originally intended if only one person in the group said they still needed it as such.

And I think anyone, intended or not intended, within the boundaries of a given healing space trying to force a change in the intention for that space is being abusive. I don’t mean its abusive to just bring up the question like, “This group is intended to be black women’s space, anyone up for changing the intention to be for all WOC?” But I mean actually disregarding an intention and bringing people outside the intended group or any other kind of forced way to change the intention of a healing space…be that a petition that frames the intention as hateful and or intimidation of any kind etc. What is happening with Michigan in terms of actively intimidating artists and attendees (appealing to currently billed artists to cancel their participation, calling other venues they are billed at and having them cancelled there with threats of boycotts to those events as well, demanding apologies for ever having performed in the past, getting fired from jobs, being denied jobs for attending, calling clients of attendees and asking them to no longer work with them etc.) is absolutely abusive and dismissive of the needs of those intended. My other blog “SSCAB/DSCAB: Reconsidering the Conversation” goes more into the background and politics around all of this, you may find it useful.

I don’t know how to do anything to make the abuse stop. But I feel it is important to stand in the truth of my experience and my own needs and values around what is happening in terms of the framing of Michigan as anti-trans. For me, it is important that such an ugly and inaccurate framing not be allowed to stand unchallenged by the voices of those of us who understand and hold dear Michigan as a healing and loving space, specifically determined for WBF. As Audre Lorde said it, “My silences [have] not protected me. Your silence will not protect you.”

So again, I want to make clear that MWMF is really an incredible experience. It’s not just a music festival. It’s not comparable to anything mainstream like Lilith Fair or any other big music festival. Yes there are well produced concerts and so it serves as entertainment. But there are no outside sponsors, no Coca Cola stage or Budweiser stage. Everything is done by the hands and hearts and intentions of WBF for the love of WBF.

But I think for most attendees the real value of Michigan is what it allows us to access within ourselves. It gives us the time and space to recover and reclaim the things that we are told are not valuable, because they do not fit into the prescribed gender roles we are assigned as people who were born female — like my low voice, body and facial hair, we get to see our many different shaped bodies as strong and beautiful on our own terms that don’t necessarily fit the standard of beauty as defined by our ability to please men. We get to own our talents with carpentry, plumbing, playing musical instruments, running sound and lighting, garbage and recycling, tree trimming and land maintenance, as well as handling childcare and tasks that are traditionally assigned to females in ways that honor that work and talent of the women who do it… This is women managing a small town made up solely of females who are finding our truest and highest selves without permission or apology.

We are young and old, of varying physical abilities. We are females of many ethnic, economic, cultural, religious and educational backgrounds sharing our experience, strength and hope and celebrating our living in a world in which we understand “we were never meant to survive” as whole and complete human beings. This, despite the very popular and negative rhetoric, is what Michigan really is about. It’s a loving and celebratory space for WBF to examine how our lives are informed by the fact that we were born and assigned female, in a way that I haven’t found possible anywhere else. If you are a WBF who finds that appealing, I hope you will consider attending or supporting the festival and the artists who perform at fest in whatever way you can.

[CherylNYC]

WOW! I mean, Holy Mother, wow. Nedra Johnson has written something so profound, and so perfect. She articulates my feelings precisely about the value of separate space. Thank you so much for posting this.

I attended MWMF once in the 1980s. Sadly, it was the year that the SEPS, (I can't remember what the acronym stood for, but they identified as lesbian separatists), triend to eject the leather women with the tacit, and sometimes explicit, support of the festival organizers. While attending MWMF awoke some of the feelings Nedra describes in her blog post, those feelings were shortlived once I became aware that there was a sizeable contingent of women in attendance who were very keen to unwelcome me. I've never been back even though I understand that there's now a large and relatively uncontroversial leather women's presence. Nedra's beautiful post makes me wonder if I shouldn't attend again.

Originally Posted by Soon

Sounds like an amazing experience! Thought I'd pass along a great blog post (http://bmgnedra.wordpress.com) I came across articulating the value of this festival for so many women:

I VALUE SEPARATE SPACES…

I value separate spaces of many kinds. I have participated in lesbian only, People of Color only, Women of Color only, black women only, black lesbian only, all women only, Womyn Born Female only. I get something different from each. I don’t particularly value queer space, but I don’t begrudge those who do taking it. For me “queer” tends to mean anyone at least half-way freaky deaky (like kinky straight folks think of themselves as “queer” now). It doesn’t speak to me as a lesbian at all. I think we, meaning lesbians, get lost in the LGBT alphabet soup. But that’s me. I think there is value in coming together occasionally or even regularly if that is what works for you. I just tend to find “inclusive” by way of “queer” doesn’t always mean the concerns of women will be addressed. For me this goes back as far as Queer Nation in NYC in the early 90’s. The issues being addressed were very white gay male focused. It’s part of why some of us women broke off and started Dyke Action Machine.

I value Womyn Born Female space because my life is informed by the fact that I was born female. It’s not just informed by my identity as a woman, but also by my female body. I did not understand that until I was in what was consciously determined Womyn Born Womyn space. (I prefer to use WBF over WBW, because I think it is more accurately spoken that way, as in “Womyn [gender, which is socially constructed] Born Female [sex, physical body]“)

I first learned about Michigan in 1986. And I learned in that first conversation about it that it was “Womyn Born Womyn” space. I had never heard the term before. The specificity struck me and the friend I was with… we both responded like “daaaaaaaaaaayum.” And I can’t say that, at the time, I responded that way because it sounded offensive or transphobic. I’d never even heard the word transphobic before. It was more that whoever put this gathering together consciously narrowed it down like that. Damn.

My first festival was in 1989. And because I understood it to be Womyn Born Female space I was conscious to consider why that might be meaningful to me. But many things struck me that I didn’t have to even think too much about. I was so impressed with everything about the festival. The production quality was amazing. It was as good as or better than any big concerts I had been to in my life. And I was more than impressed. I was SURPRISED. And I remember stopping myself and asking, “Why am I surprised?”

If anyone had asked me if I thought women/girls could do anything men/boys could do, I would have answered without hesitation “YES!” I had been fighting “girls can’t” my whole life. I literally had “girls can’t” said to me everyday of my childhood. Girls can’t play football, basketball, baseball, climb trees, play with trucks, throw a ball, do math, be good at science, take and be good at shop, play guitar… I mean on and on. And I fought it everyday. “But I am PLAYING football, therefore girls CAN play football.” I mean, seriously daily.

So I really thought I BELIEVED that girls could do anything. But what I found out was that some of that stuff had gotten under my skin and into my head and my beliefs about myself and other females. I realized that when I heard recorded music, even if the band was all women, I had some idea that if there was a guitar solo, a guy probably did that. And like I saw the stages and big tents and the sound booth and the lighting at Michigan and I imagined that guys had come and put that together. I had no idea prior to Michigan that I really thought that way. And so Michigan made me really understand that I had so much healing to do around what it means to be female and what I went through growing up, BECAUSE I am female. I realized I had internalized the messages “girls can’t” and the reflections in media and culture that inform our sense of possibilities and limitations and was applying those beliefs in my life totally without being conscious about it.

- – – – -

Sort of as a related aside, one time when I was in my late teens and living with my father, his mother, my grandmother came to visit. Gram was an opininated matriach for sure. And she had a real thing about hair. She was a hairdresser. And, because of racism, she had really internalized the idea that since we had the technology to straighten our hair as black women, we should. Straight hair is beautiful and good. Nappy hair is not. She could deal with natural hair on some level, but it had to be very well kempt and definitely not braids (dreadlocks, totally nothing she could even imagine). I was wearing my hair then similar to the way I wear it now when it’s out and that is kind of wild and curly. So one day while Gram was visiting she sighed and said to me…”I’m going to tell you something…cause I love you.” I knew to brace myself, because surely something weighted was coming. Then she said, “You used to be pretty…” And I was like, “Daaaag Gram. This is about my hair?” And she nodded. So I replied, “A lot of people like my hair.” And it was true that I did get a lot of compliments on it. But she held strong to her opinion. “They are lying to you. I’m telling you the truth, because I love you.” I was able to redirect the conversation, responding with the hook of a Louis Jordan tune we had been listening to by singing, “But I’ll die happy.” We laughed it off and I went and had my day. But later that night I was lying in my bed and I thought to myself clear as if I said it out loud, “Wow. That’s fucked up my friends lie to me.” And I shook and shocked myself thinking that, because it did get to me. IT. GOT. TO. ME! And that is a parallel experience to how all the messages get to us as girls even when we were girls who thought we were actively resisting those messages.

- – – – -

There are so many limitations and expectations forced on us. For some women perhaps all of that works with their natures. But for those of us that it doesn’t, its quite brutal. I am a woman with a low voice. And I grew up being made fun of because of it. And I learned to speak higher to avoid getting shit for my voice. That is something I have been able to heal in part, because of Michigan. Judith Casselberry, Edwina Lee Tyler, Alexis P. Suter, Ubaka Hill, Maxine Feldman and more… I’m not the only one!

At Michigan, I learned that women can be quite hairy. I am not really hairy at all. But it was very meaningful to see women fiercely rocking beards and hairy legs. And I imagined for years that they just let themselves go for fest. I had no idea that they were so daring as to present like that out in the world. Like, what is natural for women, is unacceptable socially. We are so guided and forced into standards of beauty that are impossible for most of us. And at Michigan I saw women defying the status quo of gendered expectations and defining “woman” by finding, healing and being themselves, as opposed to allowing “woman,” as it is socially constructed and understood in mainstream society, to define them.

And we tend to be trained from childhood… from babies really to protect ourselves… our virtues… we begin learning (many, maybe most of us) as babies to “sit like ladies”… with our legs closed. This is not just manners. It’s preparing us to appear less inviting… less available for unwanted sexual advances. We don’t learn to know rapists in such a way that our instincts are honed to detect their identities as rapists. The best we can do is to understand that men and boys (who we understand as anyone male) are all potential violators. We need to be careful… don’t walk down certain streets, don’t stay out late… don’t get too drunk, never go out alone… women guess and try so hard to avoid assault and yet 1 in 5 in the U.S. have been sexually assaulted. And 90 something percent of the time sexual assault of females is at the hand of males. So our instincts are honed to know, as best we can, when we are in the presence of males. I think this is both nature and nurture. It’s quite animal really to know sex this way.

I didn’t know until Michigan how ON I was all the time. Like, I think probably most women who go there for the first time end up a few days in suddenly realizing they are not afraid. Like, there are no males there. That survival instinct that kicks in everywhere else and is conscious of males in our presence doesn’t get triggered… even though there are bearded and sometimes very butch women. THAT thing does not get tripped off in WBF space. And it’s such a relief. And I mean that it is one I would not have expected. Because when I realized I was not afraid is when I realized I am normally afraid all the time. It was the absence of that fear that made me realize I had it in the first place. Its a profound realization. It was for me anyway. It’s like carrying a huge pack of rocks on your back and it being there so long you don’t even realize you are carrying it. And then someone says “hey… you can put that down now.” And you don’t even know what they are talking about. And then when you actually take it off… you can’t believe how big and heavy it was… you can’t believe it was just your normal.

I understand that many people cannot process the idea of me considering myself a trans ally when I also say that I value WBF space. I feel like if I were to deny that I find value in it when I do in order to not hurt feelings or to avoid being framed as transphobic, THAT would actually be transphobic. Not all WBF want or need WBF space. I do. Many others do. It is our healing space. The value we find in it is not about the hatred of anyone not intended to be there. I can be a better ally and show up to support inclusive events when I am more whole and healed myself.

People, anyone really… but especially oppressed classes of people, have a right and responsibility to create healing spaces as they need toward their healing. I believe in the healing powers of separatist spaces. I believe in them because I know they have been a part of my own healing. And I feel so strongly about them that I think the only people who have a right to change the intention of a given space are those intended. And for those I am included in, I would vote to hold as originally intended if only one person in the group said they still needed it as such.

And I think anyone, intended or not intended, within the boundaries of a given healing space trying to force a change in the intention for that space is being abusive. I don’t mean its abusive to just bring up the question like, “This group is intended to be black women’s space, anyone up for changing the intention to be for all WOC?” But I mean actually disregarding an intention and bringing people outside the intended group or any other kind of forced way to change the intention of a healing space…be that a petition that frames the intention as hateful and or intimidation of any kind etc. What is happening with Michigan in terms of actively intimidating artists and attendees (appealing to currently billed artists to cancel their participation, calling other venues they are billed at and having them cancelled there with threats of boycotts to those events as well, demanding apologies for ever having performed in the past, getting fired from jobs, being denied jobs for attending, calling clients of attendees and asking them to no longer work with them etc.) is absolutely abusive and dismissive of the needs of those intended. My other blog “SSCAB/DSCAB: Reconsidering the Conversation” goes more into the background and politics around all of this, you may find it useful.

I don’t know how to do anything to make the abuse stop. But I feel it is important to stand in the truth of my experience and my own needs and values around what is happening in terms of the framing of Michigan as anti-trans. For me, it is important that such an ugly and inaccurate framing not be allowed to stand unchallenged by the voices of those of us who understand and hold dear Michigan as a healing and loving space, specifically determined for WBF. As Audre Lorde said it, “My silences [have] not protected me. Your silence will not protect you.”

So again, I want to make clear that MWMF is really an incredible experience. It’s not just a music festival. It’s not comparable to anything mainstream like Lilith Fair or any other big music festival. Yes there are well produced concerts and so it serves as entertainment. But there are no outside sponsors, no Coca Cola stage or Budweiser stage. Everything is done by the hands and hearts and intentions of WBF for the love of WBF.

But I think for most attendees the real value of Michigan is what it allows us to access within ourselves. It gives us the time and space to recover and reclaim the things that we are told are not valuable, because they do not fit into the prescribed gender roles we are assigned as people who were born female — like my low voice, body and facial hair, we get to see our many different shaped bodies as strong and beautiful on our own terms that don’t necessarily fit the standard of beauty as defined by our ability to please men. We get to own our talents with carpentry, plumbing, playing musical instruments, running sound and lighting, garbage and recycling, tree trimming and land maintenance, as well as handling childcare and tasks that are traditionally assigned to females in ways that honor that work and talent of the women who do it… This is women managing a small town made up solely of females who are finding our truest and highest selves without permission or apology.

We are young and old, of varying physical abilities. We are females of many ethnic, economic, cultural, religious and educational backgrounds sharing our experience, strength and hope and celebrating our living in a world in which we understand “we were never meant to survive” as whole and complete human beings. This, despite the very popular and negative rhetoric, is what Michigan really is about. It’s a loving and celebratory space for WBF to examine how our lives are informed by the fact that we were born and assigned female, in a way that I haven’t found possible anywhere else. If you are a WBF who finds that appealing, I hope you will consider attending or supporting the festival and the artists who perform at fest in whatever way you can.

[Mel C.]

As someone who has never felt that I "fit in," Hesse events are very intimidating. Perhaps they are worth another look. Pajama....hold me.

[Soon]

Thanks, Cheryl, for putting Nedra Johnson's full name to her article.

I just finished reading an earlier piece of writing of hers that she references: "SSCAB/DSCAB: Reconsidering the Conversation” which also makes a lot of sense (to me).

It's heartening to see the many thanks that were given of those who align themselves with Ms. Johnson's words.

[Kobi]

As women, from the day we are born, we are taught, groomed, socialized, and continuously reminded that we are to put our own needs aside for the sake of others. Thus, the needs of others take precedent over our own.

It is a difficult aspect of patriarchal truth to overcome regardless of how evolved, how feminist, how radical one might think themselves to be. The simple truth is in how difficult it is for us, as women, to say NO.

Nedra Johnson is a very good writer demonstrating, in the 2 blog posts, that this concept of putting our own needs aside for the sake of others is still alive and well and thriving in our thoughts and actions.

Her words demonstrate how women will intellectualize, rationalize, and compromise as a rationale as to why they are willing to, going to, have to, capitulate to the needs of others over the needs of themselves.

Women who have the audacity to say NO, are called names (terf being one of the milder ones), harassed, blamed, shamed, bullied, threatened with violence, and otherwise faced with intimidation tactics designed to silence them aka remind them of their place, purpose, and expectations.

Radical feminists do not advocate for reworking the terminology to appease those who expect women to cave into their demands. Nor do they advocate for women to explain or justify why they need their own space. We do not require others approval or permission to do what we need to for us.

Rather, they very much advocate for calling things what they are rather than downplaying the reality to make it more palatable. Thus, domestic violence is male violence against females and rape is male sexual assault of women. Concocting an array of socially constructed acronyms in an effort to keep the peace, or make nice is not calling things what they are.

Very glad to hear MWMF was a positive experience this year. And very happy to see women talking about the need for specific spaces.

[*Anya*]

I have to smile each time I see the word: pityphuck.

I have never seen that before.

[vagina]

Yes pityphuck is the milder version of pityfuck. I felt that putting the word fuck in the title of a post might be a little abrasive, so I always tone it down for the planet. Hence we came up with the word phuck.

Oh yeah, I also forgot to mention that I participated in a sweat lodge. It was my first sweat lodge experience and this particular sweat lodge was for survivors of sexual assault. And it was exactly what I had expected. Women healing from being raped, wanting to not divest so much energy into thoughts of how to avoid it.

[Happy_Go_Lucky]

[Happy_Go_Lucky]

Michfest is another year away, the RV's and cars are likely to be parked in their home away from the land.

Vagina and I had a memorable trip, we spent a few days in Chicago before Mich, flying around in helicopters, taking relaxing boat rides around the canal, dancing the bars closed, going way up high at some of the tallest buildings in the world, gawking at the hipsters going to Lollapalooza and so much more. The only thing that kept me anxious was thinking Chicago would run out of bananas for v.

We rented a house away from michfest because I suck and blow at camping and tenting and anything that resembles "roughing it." We drove an hour round trip every day. V was excited to see porcupines, deer crossing our path, naked women (all in the same place.)

We attended several workshops, walked the land, attended every. single. performance. on the day stage, the acoustic stage, and night stage. Elvira Kurt is the MC of the opening ceremonies and v found her extremely entertaining. The dancers, the singers, the bands *notably BITCH really had us rockin'. Bitch sang "Pussy Manifesto" and of course v and I never spoke those words no less than 564,001 times during our visit. We would begin and answer questions with...."Pussy Manifesto" this and "Pussy Manifesto?" It really was not that funny, yet v insisted it was so I pretended to enjoy saying "Pussy" over and over again. Sheeeesh.

There is an area of the land known as "The Twilight Zone" where anyone (who is not shy, a prude, conservative, an introvert) hang out until the wee hours of the morning. They smoke, drink and play adult games, as well as dance dance, dance. V and I were so appalled at their behavior we felt the need to investigate this phenomenon for 4 nights straight.

This was my first attendance to the closing ceremonies out of 7 tries. I was so moved and overwhelmed, I felt catatonic and vibrant simultaneously. The peace was in every cell of my body, the white light of hope calmed me like nothing else during the performances. The 90 minutes stood still, I breathe, eat and drink it now. When it came to the end, we all howled and howled and howled. *It came easy for me as I have a Pom. V howled all the way to the car and she was answered with joining howlers. It was magic.

This was a memorable fest and I am honored vagina accompanied me.

[vagina]

Thanks Happy_Go_Lucky for not telling anyone of how scared shitless I am of heights and especially rocky skyscrapers. Or about that episode of crawling on all fours on the 103rd floor, shaking and wide-eyed because I had the 'scaweredz' of falling down. I hope nobody finds out that I have fears, lol.


Oh yeah, and we neglected to mention the beautiful lake that mezmerized me every morning as I went out to paddle board and about the mermaids that live in the lake. They are borne of the pond scum and rise like pond lilies to the surface. Luring unsuspecting women into the waters.


Oh and certainly not least, the FLOOD. We forgot to tell the planeteers about being caught in a state of emergency flood in Detroit. The soil of the land was soaked, it was so Dirt-y and Muddy. We barely made it out alive from there. Heaven knows we almost drowned.

[C0LLETTE]

I was at the first MWMF in 1976. We were a few hundred women, with the largest group (us) being from Canada ( Ontario and Quebec). I was 30 years old. When they celebrated 20 years, I was there again except this time I was 50. I thought the sky-diver was in my honour.
I remember the moment the shirts/tops first came off, the cries of "Man in the woods", the local men setting up lawn chairs in pick-up trucks to watch us shower. I remember the music but most of all, I remember getting laid a "gazillion" times.

[fever]

I am thankful for each and every account of the festival. I know a masseuse named Cairyl who goes each and every year and provides probably the best massage you will ever have. When I visit FR, I get Cairyl to work me over. lol

Perhaps this subject can continue to build interest, as it has to display the positive/energy/love/fest .
perhaps instead of being topless, I would be in one of my boustiers.

Another great goal for having my hip replaced.

I just went back to check how many times Collette said she got laid, and I shall come prepared!!! Oh my!

Originally Posted by C0LLETTE

I was at the first MWMF in 1976. We were a few hundred women, with the largest group (us) being from Canada ( Ontario and Quebec). I was 30 years old. When they celebrated 20 years, I was there again except this time I was 50. I thought the sky-diver was in my honour.
I remember the moment the shirts/tops first came off, the cries of "Man in the woods", the local men setting up lawn chairs in pick-up trucks to watch us shower. I remember the music but most of all, I remember getting laid a "gazillion" times.

[Happy_Go_Lucky]

Originally Posted by C0LLETTE

I was at the first MWMF in 1976. We were a few hundred women, with the largest group (us) being from Canada ( Ontario and Quebec). I was 30 years old. When they celebrated 20 years, I was there again except this time I was 50. I thought the sky-diver was in my honour.
I remember the moment the shirts/tops first came off, the cries of "Man in the woods", the local men setting up lawn chairs in pick-up trucks to watch us shower. I remember the music but most of all, I remember getting laid a "gazillion" times.

Hopefully you can make plans for the big Four Zero next year. The maelstrom of positive flow will be building and building until the line forms again. If you do not know this already, a great place to check in to see what is happening is the Michfest forum on their website.

As far as getting laid a banana-boat number of times? I never witnessed anything. Really. Promise. I swear. Nope. Nothing. Women holding hands, kissing. That's all. Fuckfest, errr I mean Michfest is a wholesome place for wholesome women.........who enjoy the wholesomeness.

[nanners]

Originally Posted by C0LLETTE

I was at the first MWMF in 1976. We were a few hundred women, with the largest group (us) being from Canada ( Ontario and Quebec). I was 30 years old. When they celebrated 20 years, I was there again except this time I was 50. I thought the sky-diver was in my honour.
I remember the moment the shirts/tops first came off, the cries of "Man in the woods", the local men setting up lawn chairs in pick-up trucks to watch us shower. I remember the music but most of all, I remember getting laid a "gazillion" times.

I've been to fest over 30 times, however I didn't start going until 1982 when they moved to the land they now occupy near Hart.
Fest has changed in lots of ways, and usually had some sort of controversy going on such as the "leather dykes" vs women who did not participate or approve of that lifestyle. I myself was going to the "big tent" where there were scenes going on, and let me tell you...you did not get to that place by "mistake" because you were asked along the path if you understood what was going on in there several times before you could enter.

The length of fest, the cost, the stages and even the food has changed. I mostly don't like the food. Nut loaf and burrito nights I'll eat, and breakfast is OK, the rest I bring my own food including meat.

I have met the best ever friends, ones I stay in touch with mostly on a daily basis and gather with at other times during the year whenever any of us can get together.

On the "land" I have been hurt deeply, fallen in and out of love, and healed. I have laughed until I couldn't breathe, cried until I hyperventilated, stayed up most of the night, slept half the day away, and heard some of the best music I have ever heard in my life.

The security is much better than it was in the early years and now the only time you'd see a man on the land would be the guys who come into empty the portajanes (portajohns) and this is always done in the wee hours of the morning.

The showers are mostly back enough from the "internal road" through fest that not much can be seen if one is looking for naked bodies.

Used to be more women would go topless, or completely naked if they wish, now not as much. Among my friends, it's more a fear of cameras/phones and social media....they don't want to show up in the background of someone's photo and end up having their naked/topless body out there for their boss or family to see.

As far as sex, yes you can find it I'm sure...I haven't been one to really look for it specifically, but it has happened a couple times when I was single. It won't happen for me anymore that way because I have a partner and she'll be with me next year.

I love fest, and I missed it this year...I'm still sad about it. I'll be there next year, and if you haven't been there at least once and are inclined to go, please do it...and if you've been there and been turned off by it for some reason try it once more and see if it's changed for you.

I know the trans inclusion thing is a big deal, and I really hope this thread does not end up going towards the controversy...I want to tell and hear of the good that this festival is for thousands of women and their children.

I have 2 friends who brought their mothers and daughters this year for the first time, and they all loved it and will return next year.

Amazon Womyn Rise!!

[Femmadian]

Ahhhh, I've never been but want to go so badly. It'd be a 2,500 km drive (one way!) or a very expensive 7 hour flight to get there from where I am, but dammit, I'm resolved to make it next year even if I have to pimp myself out as a femme-for-butch escort.

I read that Nedra Johnson piece on her blog a short while ago and thought it summed up perfectly why spaces like Michfest are so important. I just wish there were more of them!

I'm a bit nervous about the camping thing though... while I can appreciate nature in the abstract, I'm not exactly what you'd call an "outdoorsy girl" and I haven't been camping since I was dragged out unwillingly as a teenager. I don't even own a pair of shorts... Or jeans. Or flip-flops. Or flat sandals. Or a tent. Or, or, or... the list goes on.

Question for the femmes: how did you find the camping aspect? Are you a camper in general or is Michfest your exception? Are there any things you'd wished you'd known ahead of time or adjustments you've made over the years which have saved you time or frustration? Do most Festies tend to go "granola" for the duration of Fest out of convenience? Is there really no cell service at all?

Also, I'm a little confused as to what exactly the Twilight Zone is. Is it strictly for BDSM practitioners? Do you have like some bulldykes casually playing poker and downing a few beers while a few feet over there's someone being whipped and tied to a tree or what? It sounds very odd... and a little intimidating to a somewhat introverted chem-free gal who has little to no experience in BDSM. Is it like a giant kinky play party in the woods? I've read snippets about it elsewhere online and the doms made it sound like Varsity level kink where only Very Serious Players seeking Very Serious Experiences with Very Serious Skills should dare to venture. Lots of gatekeeping. Kinda turned me off. Vagina and Happy Go Lucky, you must have been really appalled considering your extensive in depth investigation. How is it different from the rest of the "activities" that tend to go on throughout Fest? What's the crowd makeup like (numbers, ages, types of people, etc.)? Any things you liked or didn't like about it? Inquiring Festie Virgins need to know.

[Happy_Go_Lucky]

Femmadian

Firstly, my Canadian femme for Butch escort and entertainer extraordinaire, sooner rather than later, please check out the Michfest chat forum. Take that leap and create a user name and dive in! Over these next nearly 12 months, get to know the long timers who have multiple visits to festie. Our own Ms. Nanners probably has panty-loads of tips and guidance for whomever would just inquire.

In the forum, you will more likely meet other Canadians from your neck of the far away woods and possibly start a plan for meet-ups and other way to pool your resources to get to Michigan. Trust me. You can always return to your successful escort business at any time. K?

As you probably read, HGL does not tent or camp, I solved this challenge. YOU may be able to friend a woman or two, three, four, or five who drive their well stocked RV's and campers to the festival. They are stocked with lots and lots of red meat and liquor. Not all of us want a kibble burrito or kale stew night after dreadful night after night. Flash your pearly whites at them and you may get an invitation .... or 97.

"The Twilight Zone" is do whatever you want to do, need to do, want to do part of the land tucked securely far far away for the safety of all the other campers. The pearl clutchers will forever grumble about the noise of decadence and quizzical behavior, as well as unusual twitching of your olfactory glands. It is its own community, they party, eat, sleep and fuck together. (From what I experienced) They have a great time and make no apologies, I respect them a great deal.

You need to be 21 to attend the "themed parties" at The Zone, there are 20 somethings to 50 somethings who leave behind a few brain cells there. Depending on your goals for Michfest next year, such as do you want to sleep all day and not see too many performers or attend workshops the zone is for you. If attending the 9456 workshops and attending concerts are for you, well then.

Much success to you finding your path there. May I suggest a clothing optional car wash for us Butches on The Planet?