Where to go from here...

dixie · 07-07-2010, 08:43 PM

Okay, background info on my situation: Two years ago I had a wonderful job, a nice apartment in the city and seemed to be "living the good life". I was also an unmedicated, undiagnosed bipolar individual. In April of 2008, I had a suicide attempt which landed me in the hospital for quite some time. Needless to say, as a result I lost everything...job, home, etc. I know you must be wondering why I'm posting this here instead of the mental illness thread, but I'm getting to that...

I've taken these last two years to find myself, so to speak. I have finally come to terms with this illness and found my serenity and peace within. Unfortunately, two years of soul searching really drains a bank account. I've never had an issue with finding employment, and usually worked 2-3 jobs at a time. Now I am at my wits end at not finding ANY jobs. I've sent my resume to more places than I can name, and have been on a number of dead-end interviews.

And it all seems to come down to this one question: "Why is there a two year gap in your employment record?"

I've tried both "options", i.e. being completely honest and slightly hedging. I began with the honest approach. Those interviewers wrinkled their noses, looked at me like I was a rabid animal, and cut the interviews short. (And yes, some of them were extremely rude and hurtful.) That's when I began hedging. By hedging, I told them I had been dealing with a health issue and taking time with my family. Those interviewers then wanted to go on and on asking me what kind of health issue, if the health issue would resurface, am i dying, yadda yadda yadda. I was extremely uncomfortable with not being fully honest with a potential employer, but (1) I felt that if I told the reason I would get similar reactions to the first few bunches of interviewers, and (2) I truly don't feel that it's their place to know something that personal.

I know that the "two year gap" is the issue at heart. My resume is a proven track record that I can do a job and do it damn well. Unfortunately, these potential employers (especially the ones I was honest with) can't seem to see past "crazy 2 year gap girl" sitting across from them...

So i guess my question to you is, where do I go from here? Am I wrong to feel that an issue like that is not a potential employer's business? Is there a better way to address the issue that would make both myself and a potential employer more comfortable? How do I get past this issue and have a successful interview? What's the best way to move forward?

I'm butting my head against the wall. I really have no idea how to go about answering the "gap" question. Any and all advice that you can give me would be greatly appreciated....

Waldo · 07-07-2010, 08:52 PM

You are in an interview selling yourself as much as your abilities. You're not doing a very good job of it when you're laying all this out there and hedging it is even worse.

It has become much more common place for individuals to take a break. Develop a story and stick with it.

"I'd been working for X years and decided that I wanted a break. I was fortunate enough to have the resources which allowed me to do so. I'm recharged, refocused and ready to be part of an organization that can challenge me."

When or if they ask more questions you do not need to go into the details. Have a couple of answers at the ready which do not delve into the details but which explain away any inquiry.

dixie · 07-07-2010, 09:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Waldo

You are in an interview selling yourself as much as your abilities. You're not doing a very good job of it when you're laying all this out there and hedging it is even worse.

It has become much more common place for individuals to take a break. Develop a story and stick with it.

"I'd been working for X years and decided that I wanted a break. I was fortunate enough to have the resources which allowed me to do so. I'm recharged, refocused and ready to be part of an organization that can challenge me."

When or if they ask more questions you do not need to go into the details. Have a couple of answers at the ready which do not delve into the details but which explain away any inquiry.

I always start out with the "selling myself". I don't go into the interview and start by "laying it out there". I guess I'm just a little too ingrained with some things, because I prefer trying to answer questions honestly. *shrug*

I guess I didn't realize it would be such an issue, because it caught me off guard the first time the question was brought up. I guess it gave me a major insecurity about it that leads to the interview bombing, because once it's brought up I feel my heart sinking, thinking "oh great, here we go..."

I appreciate your advice and ideas. I will try to have those answers at the ready and not divulge more information than necessary. Thanks Waldo!

Waldo · 07-07-2010, 09:16 PM

You are not being dishonest. You're just not divulging all the details. Think of it as mArketing spin. Would you buy a used car if you knew that it had a history of breaking down?

An employer, particularly in this market, has a nearly unlimited supply of seemingly great candidates. Don't say or do anything that cast yourself in anything but the most flattering light.

I've interviewed dozens of women who sabotage themselves in similar manners and it always makes me sad. I'd love to be able to pull them asi and explain it to them.

dixie · 07-07-2010, 09:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Waldo

You are not being dishonest. You're just not divulging all the details. Think of it as mArketing spin. Would you buy a used car if you knew that it had a history of breaking down?

An employer, particularly in this market, has a nearly unlimited supply of seemingly great candidates. Don't say or do anything that cast yourself in anything but the most flattering light.

I've interviewed dozens of women who sabotage themselves in similar manners and it always makes me sad. I'd love to be able to pull them asi and explain it to them.

That's so true, especially about the car. I guess I've never really thought of the "marketing spin" side of it. Funny how I can be so intelligent at some things and have zero common sense at others...lol I just have such a bad habit of being too "detailed", especially when I'm afraid that I will be misrepresenting an issue. I think that's what I'm afraid of. I'm scared that I will "market myself" and then down the road somehow the issue will come up and I will feel like I misrepresented myself. It's probably another reason why I don't embellish a darn thing on my resume. It's very blunt and to the point...lol

Thanks again Waldo, you've been a really big help.

little man · 07-07-2010, 10:42 PM

i have had a tendency to job hop. once the challenge is gone or i find there is nowhere to go, i find other work. obviously, employers don't like the idea of hiring someone who will leave after a couple of years.

when i put my resume together, i base it on cumulative years of specific skills or skillsets. i can recall being asked only once for specific dates and employers.

thusfar, i've not had much issue finding work. i have a broad set of job skills and point to those rather than time with a specific employer.

07-07-2010, 08:43 PM	#1
dixie Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: I usually just poke it with a stick. Preferred Pronoun?: Bitch Relationship Status: Intertwined deeply Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: We're all a little mad here. Posts: 6,627 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 10,972 Thanked 21,385 Times in 4,808 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	Where to go from here... Okay, background info on my situation: Two years ago I had a wonderful job, a nice apartment in the city and seemed to be "living the good life". I was also an unmedicated, undiagnosed bipolar individual. In April of 2008, I had a suicide attempt which landed me in the hospital for quite some time. Needless to say, as a result I lost everything...job, home, etc. I know you must be wondering why I'm posting this here instead of the mental illness thread, but I'm getting to that... I've taken these last two years to find myself, so to speak. I have finally come to terms with this illness and found my serenity and peace within. Unfortunately, two years of soul searching really drains a bank account. I've never had an issue with finding employment, and usually worked 2-3 jobs at a time. Now I am at my wits end at not finding ANY jobs. I've sent my resume to more places than I can name, and have been on a number of dead-end interviews. And it all seems to come down to this one question: "Why is there a two year gap in your employment record?" I've tried both "options", i.e. being completely honest and slightly hedging. I began with the honest approach. Those interviewers wrinkled their noses, looked at me like I was a rabid animal, and cut the interviews short. (And yes, some of them were extremely rude and hurtful.) That's when I began hedging. By hedging, I told them I had been dealing with a health issue and taking time with my family. Those interviewers then wanted to go on and on asking me what kind of health issue, if the health issue would resurface, am i dying, yadda yadda yadda. I was extremely uncomfortable with not being fully honest with a potential employer, but (1) I felt that if I told the reason I would get similar reactions to the first few bunches of interviewers, and (2) I truly don't feel that it's their place to know something that personal. I know that the "two year gap" is the issue at heart. My resume is a proven track record that I can do a job and do it damn well. Unfortunately, these potential employers (especially the ones I was honest with) can't seem to see past "crazy 2 year gap girl" sitting across from them... So i guess my question to you is, where do I go from here? Am I wrong to feel that an issue like that is not a potential employer's business? Is there a better way to address the issue that would make both myself and a potential employer more comfortable? How do I get past this issue and have a successful interview? What's the best way to move forward? I'm butting my head against the wall. I really have no idea how to go about answering the "gap" question. Any and all advice that you can give me would be greatly appreciated....

07-07-2010, 08:52 PM	#2
Waldo Member How Do You Identify?: Special Snowflake Preferred Pronoun?: she/her Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Wine Country, Oregon Posts: 470 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 22 Thanked 795 Times in 238 Posts Rep Power: 1006287	You are in an interview selling yourself as much as your abilities. You're not doing a very good job of it when you're laying all this out there and hedging it is even worse. It has become much more common place for individuals to take a break. Develop a story and stick with it. "I'd been working for X years and decided that I wanted a break. I was fortunate enough to have the resources which allowed me to do so. I'm recharged, refocused and ready to be part of an organization that can challenge me." When or if they ask more questions you do not need to go into the details. Have a couple of answers at the ready which do not delve into the details but which explain away any inquiry. __________________ Perved lately? \| My website \| NEW: lez.org

07-07-2010, 09:16 PM	#4
Waldo Member How Do You Identify?: Special Snowflake Preferred Pronoun?: she/her Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Wine Country, Oregon Posts: 470 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 22 Thanked 795 Times in 238 Posts Rep Power: 1006287	You are not being dishonest. You're just not divulging all the details. Think of it as mArketing spin. Would you buy a used car if you knew that it had a history of breaking down? An employer, particularly in this market, has a nearly unlimited supply of seemingly great candidates. Don't say or do anything that cast yourself in anything but the most flattering light. I've interviewed dozens of women who sabotage themselves in similar manners and it always makes me sad. I'd love to be able to pull them asi and explain it to them. __________________ Perved lately? \| My website \| NEW: lez.org

07-07-2010, 10:42 PM	#6
little man Member How Do You Identify?: mister Preferred Pronoun?: he Relationship Status: hard to hold Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: where the road goes on forever and the party never ends Posts: 1,003 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 169 Thanked 1,533 Times in 437 Posts Rep Power: 13709163	i have had a tendency to job hop. once the challenge is gone or i find there is nowhere to go, i find other work. obviously, employers don't like the idea of hiring someone who will leave after a couple of years. when i put my resume together, i base it on cumulative years of specific skills or skillsets. i can recall being asked only once for specific dates and employers. thusfar, i've not had much issue finding work. i have a broad set of job skills and point to those rather than time with a specific employer. __________________ i gots pitchers here i'm a rambling man i ain't ever gonna change i got a gypsy soul to blame and i was born for leaving --zac brown band (colder weather)