04-08-2010, 07:35 PM | #1 |
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Have You Found Your Soul Mate?
Well I saw this on yahoo and thought I'd share. I thought it would be a great topic. Do you believe in soulmates? If so or not why? Any comments are welcome...
Do you believe there is a soul mate out there for you? Well, you're not alone. Studies from the University of Virginia have shown that over 90% of young adults believe in the concept. And 88% believe that destiny has determined that there is one and only one person who is your soul mate. The concept of the soul mate is thousands of years old and probably was originated by the Greek philosopher Plato. Plato described a soul mate as the person's "other half" that has been split from him. The quest of life is to find your missing half. That theme has been explored in movies like "The Butcher's Wife," "The Time Traveler's Wife," and "City of Angels." Other views of soul mates include reincarnation: our soul mate is someone with whom we have shared other lives. The soul mate concept also carries with it the belief that a perfect person exists for us, if only we could find him or her -- then love and life would be easy. This belief has created a lot of trouble for people, especially in the area of commitment. By insisting on finding a perfect partner, many people have walked away from really great potential partners. Why? Because something was missing. Maybe it was chemistry, or that he/she didn't match their ideal of The One. So they've ended up alone, still looking for that perfect soul mate. The renowned family psychiatrist Frank Pittman once said, "Nothing has produced more unhappiness than the concept of the soul mate." Having been a psychologist for more than 25 years, and married to one guy for the same long stretch, I can tell you that there are no perfect partners out there. Not me. Not my husband. Not any of my many clients, friends, or family members. Lasting love is a hard-won battle of personal discipline, compromise, dedication, and commitment. Scientists have found that scent plays a role in physical attraction and desire. Other research shows that those who are of similar educational levels are more compatible. While I don't believe in The One perfect person idea, I do believe that there are better matches for us. And if we are with one of these people, we are more likely to have the experience of being with the one who is a soul mate (which I have had personally and can tell you, is a marvelous thing!). The Indications So chances are, there is more than one person out there who fits the bill for you. All of them are less than perfect. But if there are no perfect partners, how can you know whether to stay or go? Here are 10 relationship markers to help you know if he or she is The One: 1. When you're together you feel like you've come home. 2. You feel like your partnership was meant to be, as if kissed by destiny. 3. In your communication with each other there is a rapid "knowing" of what each of you means. 4. You have a shared mission in life, perhaps a cause, a career, or the creation of a family life. 5. When you're together the world seems like a better place. 6. Your mood is elevated when you're together. It's not necessarily passion or excitement, although that's there too at times. 7. When you look at him/her you see a part of yourself that's been missing. Perhaps it's her assertiveness or his joy of adventure. But it's something that when added to your life, makes you feel more complete. 8. Being together makes you more hopeful about the future you are creating. 9. You can be more authentic and fully yourself around your partner. 10. Being together makes each of you work harder on overcoming bad habits and becoming more loving people. Don't worry if you don't feel all 10 of these things when you're with your partner. That's where the imperfection comes in -- either in you or your partner. If you are experiencing six or more of these markers, chances are you are matched well. Over time you can work towards having all of these qualities. Couples who have lasting love find that their relationships get closer and better over time. And that process has been my privilege and good fortune to experience personally -- after a lot of hard work that continues to this day! Bottom line: your chances of finding The One are better than you think. So go out there and start looking. Love almost always comes in a surprise package that opens up in marvelous and magical ways |
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04-08-2010, 07:57 PM | #2 |
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well, I dont believe there is only one soul mate. I have actually found that I have a set of two brothers who are my soul mates. They have both manifested in this life, but at different times. I also know there is at least one other soul mate.
I dont buy into the one and only one true love.
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04-08-2010, 08:21 PM | #3 |
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Yes I believe in soul mates.Call me weird but every since I was a wee one,i dreamt of a person in Ireland who was suppose to come to america and marry me and we would live happily ever after.It's the truth.If never happen of course but I always think of him somewhere out there yet,probably married,old and grey,and with many grandbabies.It happen like that cause I never did set foot in Ireland Or maybe he never came to America,end of story.
In kindergarten there was this boy who called me his soul mate.He said I would be his wife one day,he lived several blocks away from our home.He came calling on me everyday up to the time my parents lost our home and we were forced to move out.Afterwards i never gave him much thought,even many years later.But when I do think of him i wonder if he's still searching for me out there somewhere,that or just completely gave up ever finding me. Yes,I believe in souls mates. |
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04-08-2010, 08:27 PM | #4 |
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I have always believed in "the one". Throughout my life I have not had it personally...but I have seen stunning examples of it in others' relationships (my brother and his wife for one). I do believe that, for each of us, there is that one person in this world who is our missing piece. We just have to be lucky enough to find them.
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04-08-2010, 08:29 PM | #5 |
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good artical, thanks.
I was thinking about this just yesterday...weird. |
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04-08-2010, 08:32 PM | #6 |
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I was reluctant to post at the risk of sounding sappy and throwing my butch exterior. I believe in a soulmate of some kind. Someone who makes you feel complete. Someone that makes home feel like home. You only call it home because they are there. But I'm a hopeless romantic and eternally sappy by nature.....so go figure.
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04-08-2010, 08:36 PM | #7 |
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I nice notion, but no, I don't subscribe to the idea of a soul mate.
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04-08-2010, 08:48 PM | #8 |
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Im not shure I beleave in soul mates.Well because over a lifetime I have met ppl who for what ever time we shared we were both halves of each other..when the time was up we parted.I really beleave that we meet ppl and for what ever time is writen in the stars we have together is ment to be ..we are capable of loveing in diffrent ways.
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04-08-2010, 08:58 PM | #9 |
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I kinda wonder every now and again... if the little boy who became a "good ole country boy" that had a very serious crush on me in 2nd grade all the way up until we were adults and I moved out of State was a soul mate?? He never faltered and him and his family were always so kind to me and my son. He was so gentle and kind, with TONS of respect. We were never involved, although I adored his friendship. He took me to one homecoming dance once, even bought me my dress and paid for my hairdresser... we danced a little, but he was too much of a teenage boy with that goofy horney grin. I think he turned out to be a fine respectful and respectable gentleman. But it just wasn't in our cards for various reasons. Many times over the last couple years, I think of him and wonder where he is? Did he find his soul mate and settle down? He will always be a dear, adored friend to me. My good ole southern boy with is 2nd grade crush.
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04-08-2010, 09:07 PM | #10 |
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My soulmate Picker has been on strike for quite some time now.... so when it's ready I'm sure it will start pickin away.
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04-08-2010, 09:37 PM | #11 |
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Well......
It would appear not. I met one, who I thought may have been, or maybe we just remembered each other form another life. But alas, I have my soul mate order clipped on the silver turning wheel, in the kitchen of the soul mate cafe.......
order up! Pashi
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04-08-2010, 09:46 PM | #12 |
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Once upon a time I thought I did. We were so in tune with each other. Alas, the fear of committing to someone forever, scared me off. I've always had a firm belief that nothing is forever unless you take it into your next life. The old saying, a reason, a season or a lifetime is the way I see things now.
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04-08-2010, 10:04 PM | #13 |
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I have met people who believed I was their soul mate. I didn't think they were mine. I do believe in soul mates. I thought once that I met one, she apparently didn't think so. lol. (It's always a bad sign.) I don't know that I have one. I like to think I do. I'm also not so sure I would see it if it happened to be there. I think perfect and perfect for me are two very different ideas. Perhaps they are not my missing half - that would be kinda creepy. Just different enough to be interesting and just same enough to be comfortable...That would be nice.
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04-08-2010, 10:27 PM | #14 |
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Not yet, but maybe one day!
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04-08-2010, 10:44 PM | #15 |
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I thought I had met my soulmate long ago, but turns out it was just me wishing so much that we would be. I now know the difference, because when I met my true soulmate, the feeling was so deep and so natural and real that I knew without a doubt -- and so did he!
So...yes I have...finally.
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04-08-2010, 10:47 PM | #16 |
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~ ~ ~ yes ~ ~ ~
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04-09-2010, 04:18 AM | #17 |
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I think so and Shelia feels the same way.
We are very much in tune with each other - always have been, even while in the "getting to know you before we even think about starting to date" phase. |
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04-09-2010, 04:28 AM | #18 |
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Thank you everyone for your response I do believe in one true soulmate. I know that their are just a couple of times I thought I met her. But it wasnt! LOL So, apparently she is still out there... And one day when its supposed too our paths will cross... Im enjoying reading everyone's responses
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04-09-2010, 04:32 AM | #19 |
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I have two soulmates. One has been for 20 years and, another, for nearly 16 years.
I can't imagine life without ever having met either one. |
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04-09-2010, 05:14 AM | #20 |
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Yes I have. His name is Bob.
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