Woman aims for 1,000 pound weight goal

[Soon]

Originally Posted by IrishGrrl

And if these men think being that large is sexy, why dont THEY gain the weight??!@#

B/c a woman's body is meant for THEIR sexual arousal/objectification? (small, large--etc.) and some women will attempt to conform to whatever beauty ideal is perceived by others--no matter how destructive.

(and derive a form of self-fulfillment from achieving a certain look despite its toll on their physical well-being or its potential negative impact on others--including their children.)

[NJFemmie]

Originally Posted by IrishGrrl

I find it interesting that the people who dont see how destructive this is for the children, are people who dont HAVE children.

(non judgy..just an observation)

Side note: I don't have children.

Medusa: You would be right, TOO.
I don't think a mother (or father) should "give up" their lives for their children - it certainly doesn't seem 'fair'. However, I think that those types of actions are a bit too extreme - you can find a medium place to have a life AND make sure you are there for your kids at the same time - I have lots of friends who do it, and they don't seem to be suffering for the sake of their children.

Fat positive to me does not equal destructive behavior. I really think her "goal" is set for self-destruct.

[apretty]

Originally Posted by June

I dont care for this. I cannot imagine incapacitating oneself deliberately like this. Eating disorders are nothing to fuck with on either side of the scales.

She is not repulsive to me, what she is mindfully doing, is.

i agree.

she's killing herself.

would we watch a drug addict over a course of time, overdose? would we want to protect her children?

meh, this just sucks.

[Apocalipstic]

It freaks me out to think that we would want the government to take away her kids.

What is the line?

Who gets to pick?

Who would be in charge of deciding what is too fat. 200lbs? 300lbs? Mobility?

Should pregnant women be forced to give birth based on giving up one's life for ones children? If a child needs an organ, should the government force them to give it.

And no, I don't think we would look at a man on the same way. We never do.

No, I don't have kids or my own, but have lived with kids of a partner and I agree they take a lot of work, but do we want to government deciding on what weight is and is not safe to be a mother?

Slippery slope.

[Lynn]

The fact is that there are many people who develop diseases like diabetes and high blood pressure, and then choose not to follow their doctors' orders. My own brother is not severely overweight, but he challenges his ulcerative colitis daily to the point that I have to wonder if he is trying to kill himself. He's a young father, married with two children and a business that supports his family. His death, which doesn't seem so farfetched, would be emotionally and physically devastating to his family. His choices don't attract media attention, but they are questionable, none-the-less.

One thing about having kids is that you just don't know how it's going to turn out. There are situations when what is required is to put yourself aside for some years to make sure that their needs are met. Especially if there are medical issues or financial strains, it is conceivable that a person (a mom) will lose herself entirely for a time, and I don't think that's unusual. Keeping your own "center" through the roller-coaster of making sure your kid's needs are met is not easy or always functional, even. This is something I know about. If you read a parenting magazine in the doctor's waiting room, there are all these little articles about taking care of yourself: take a bubble bath, take up scrapbooking, read a book, join a photography class...etc. People have to be REMINDED to focus on themselves, even a couple of hours a week. That can be the reality of their lives.

Gaining weight to become 1,000 lbs, and all the stuff that goes with it for this woman is certainly her choice. I actually *do* think it's wrong on so many levels. I don't think her children should be taken away, in that they do have another caregiver in the home who can meet their basic needs. But, their mother is sure a questionable role model, and I can't help think about how they will view their mother and their childhood when they are grown. Having this woman as a mother is not a benign thing. Think about how our own mothers affected us. I do think it's OK to look at something, like this situation, and filter it through some sense of ethics without apology. Some things are actually right, and some things are actually not so right, even though we can agree that we won't all agree on what they are.

[Medusa]

Originally Posted by apretty

i agree.

she's killing herself.

would we watch a drug addict over a course of time, overdose? would we want to protect her children?

meh, this just sucks.

I like the parallel that you draw between what this person is doing and a drug addict.
If we view her choice to eat this much (or the attention that she gets from eating this much?) as an addiction, would we view her husband as an enabler? (this one seems like a no brainer)
Would we view the feeder/gainer community that she is part of as culpable in helping her maintain her addiction? Is there a culture in the feeder/gainer community that celebrates this addiction?

[Bit]

Originally Posted by HowSoonIsNow

“In a typical day I’ll eat four burgers and fries, a loaf of bread with peanut butter and jam, four servings of meatloaf and mashed potato, a large pizza, a chocolate cake with ice cream and cream, 12 cupcakes, two cheesecakes and fizzy drinks.

Thank you for the quotes, HSIN.

Here's my question for everyone. Can you choose to do that without throwing up? Can ANY of us choose to do that without throwing up?

There is something physically, hormonally wrong with this woman. That's why it really bothers me that her size is being attributed to her choice. She has some underlying hormonal imbalance that forces her body to turn what she eats into fat, and it allows her to eat unreasonable amounts of food--amounts that would make any of the rest of us throw up because our bodies would automatically reject the sheer volume of food.

She did not choose the underlying hormonal imbalance.

What she chooses to do with this problem that she is forced to live with, whether she chooses to embrace it, to celebrate it, to flaunt it--this does not negate the fact that she has an underlying physical problem that has caused it in the first place.

As for her children, are they being beaten or molested? Are they growing up under emotional abuse? Are they being prevented from attending school? Are they neglected?

Or are they happy and well-loved?

We do not have proof that her children will grow up maladjusted.

We don't actually have enough information--in either direction--to make an accurate judgment call about them. But let's assume for the sake of argument that they will somehow grow up maladjusted, that they will have a bad relationship with food, that they may need therapy to gain a healthy adult life.

What makes them any different from me, or from you? How many of us still struggle with weight issues, self-esteem issues? Even worse, how many of us struggle with abuse and molestation and neglect issues? How many of us only live healthy adult lives because we got therapy?

Nobody wishes for children to suffer; it wrenches the heart. But we survived it, and if these children do suffer, they also will survive it.

My guess is, they will survive it much more easily than those who are beaten, molested, and neglected.

[NJFemmie]

When someone says "I have a goal" ... it implies that they are purposely and actively working to attain that goal.

Hormonal balances aside - does it not say something when someone says I WANT to eat myself to 1000 lbs??

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by NJFemmie

When someone says "I have a goal" ... it implies that they are purposely and actively working to attain that goal.

Hormonal balances aside - does it not say something when someone says I WANT to eat myself to 1000 lbs??

Right or wrong, do you think the government should take away her kids?

What is the line?

[UofMfan]

As a mother of a son who was almost taken away from me simply due to the fact that I was gay, I am a little weary when I hear people talk about the “government”, or anyone for that matter, taking kids away from their mothers. Having said that, I must keep in mind that I did not “choose” my sexual orientation, whereas this woman has chosen and as continuously chooses, to put herself and her dysfunctional ways before her children. In any event, I still don’t advocate anyone’s children being taken away unless they are truly in danger. There lies the question about child custody, and it is so difficult to decide in this case if they are indeed in danger or simply subjected to unhealthy behavior. It also amazes me that most of those who are appalled at the “government” running anything, more specifically healthcare, have no problem rationalizing the government’s role in parenting issues. I am with Apocalipstic, where do we draw the line?

The article is not giving us the whole picture, but the one that it does give us is very grim. This woman is willing to kill herself in the name of 15 minutes of fame and her name appearing in print in the Guinness Book of World Records. This says so much more about our society than it does about this poor woman. In the age of realities, celebrity worshiping, etc, how can we blame her? We have the Octomom as another example, when will we stop worshiping the wrong people for the wrong reasons? What will be next?

I personally don’t believe this has anything to do with being “fat positive”, and I am sure this will bring in a lot of comments. Being “fat positive” does not equal being suicidal. I have been pondering whether to post on here or not because of the sensitivity of the subject, but in my mind setting a goal to reach 1,000lbs is simply insane. It is not sexy it is not positive it is not safe, for her or her children. Being 1,000 lbs is not being fat, it is a legacy that this woman will leave her children, one that not only includes eating disorders, but it also includes giving your children the wrong lessons and more importantly, teaching them how low self-esteem can go.

[NJFemmie]

Originally Posted by apocalipstic

Right or wrong, do you think the government should take away her kids?

What is the line?

I think if she is unable or incapable of caring for her children, then yes, I do - just as I would with ANY type of child neglect/abuse/what-have-you from ANY parent - but not just because she wants to eat herself into oblivion. If she is capable of providing proper care, then of course not. I personally think she is not setting a good example - but that's my opinion.

Running along apretty's statement ... would you not want intervention if a drug addict's kid is being neglected?

When a person puts themselves out there (meaning in the public eye), EVERYONE, including government agencies (especially when the potential for danger exists) are going to watch closely. If they didn't - we'd cry that the system failed.

If she isn't thinking about her kids, maybe someone has to. But I don't think anything should be handled prematurely.

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by NJFemmie

I think if she is unable or incapable of caring for her children, then yes, I do - just as I would with ANY type of child neglect/abuse/what-have-you from ANY parent - but not just because she wants to eat herself into oblivion. If she is capable of providing proper care, then of course not. I personally think she is not setting a good example - but that's my opinion.

Running along apretty's statement ... would you not want intervention if a drug addict's kid is being neglected?

When a person puts themselves out there (meaning in the public eye), EVERYONE, including government agencies (especially when the potential for danger exists) are going to watch closely. If they didn't - we'd cry that the system failed.

If she isn't thinking about her kids, maybe someone has to. But I don't think anything should be handled prematurely.

Agreed, I would want to know if indeed the kids are being neglected.

[Apocalipstic]

Are people who buy the Guiness Book of World Records or support the types of magazines and websites she is making money from culpable?

[Soon]

Bit,

Just as we don't have "proof that her children will grow up maladjusted" (or neglected, etc.), how do you know, for certain, that this she has an "underlying hormonal imbalance"?

I am no physiological expert, but from my understanding, the stomach can expand to to a much larger size depending on food intake.

Even if there was an initial imbalance, her choices override it at this point.

Everything I have read has attributed her increasing weight as her choice, and I find it interesting that you are focused on how she lacks choice due to a hormonal imbalance.

Maybe it's like saying a person has a predisposition to drug/alcohol addiction? However, be that as it may, I think society should become at least aware of a parent who knowingly and publicly asserts their right to their addictions to the point of self-destruction--at the very least to keep an eye on the children's welfare (to answer Apoc's question) to see if the children's needs are being met. However, even with the most basic needs met, I do worry about the inherent harm (present and future) such behaviour has on her children (psychological and, perhaps, later, physical)--but I don't think that is a reason to remove them.

She takes complete ownership and has encouraged publicity of this quest to reach her goal weight.

I don't have much empathy for her--unlike those who are struggling to overcome their issues/addictions for themselves and families--she desires to go head long into a journey that will lead to further harm.


To answer Apoc's last question: No, I don't think the World Record consumers are culpable.

[UofMfan]

Originally Posted by HowSoonIsNow

Bit,

Just as we don't have "proof that her children will grow up maladjusted" (or neglected, etc.), how do you know, for certain, that this she has an "underlying hormonal imbalance"?

I am no physiological expert, but from my understanding, the stomach can expand to to a much larger size depending on food intake.

Even if there was an initial imbalance, her choices override it at this point.

Everything I have read has attributed her increasing weight as her choice, and I find it interesting that you are focused on how she lacks choice due to a hormonal imbalance.

Maybe it's like saying a person has a predisposition to drug/alcohol addiction? However, be that as it may, I think society should become at least aware of a parent who knowingly and publicly asserts their right to in their addictions to the point of self-destruction. At least to keep an eye on the children's welfare (to answer Apoc's question) to see if the children's needs are being met. However, even with the most basic needs met, I do worry about the inherent psychological harm (present and future) such behaviour has on her children--but I don't think that is a reason to remove them.

She takes complete ownership and has encouraged publicity of this quest to reach her goal weight.

I don't have much empathy for her--unlike those who are struggling to overcome their issues/addictions for themselves and families--she desires to go head long into a journey that will lead to further harm.

I have a hormonal imbalance and I do not weigh 1,000lbs, not even close!

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by HowSoonIsNow

Bit,

Just as we don't have "proof that her children will grow up maladjusted" (or neglected, etc.), how do you know, for certain, that this she has an "underlying hormonal imbalance"?

I am no physiological expert, but from my understanding, the stomach can expand to to a much larger size depending on food intake.

Even if there was an initial imbalance, her choices override it at this point.

Everything I have read has attributed her increasing weight as her choice, and I find it interesting that you are focused on how she lacks choice due to a hormonal imbalance.

Maybe it's like saying a person has a predisposition to drug/alcohol addiction? However, be that as it may, I think society should become at least aware of a parent who knowingly and publicly asserts their right to in their addictions to the point of self-destruction. At least to keep an eye on the children's welfare (to answer Apoc's question) to see if the children's needs are being met. However, even with the most basic needs met, I do worry about the inherent psychological harm (present and future) such behaviour has on her children--but I don't think that is a reason to remove them.

She takes complete ownership and has encouraged publicity of this quest to reach her goal weight.

I don't have much empathy for her--unlike those who are struggling to overcome their issues/addictions for themselves and families--she desires to go head long into a journey that will lead to further harm.


To answer Apoc's last question: No, I don't think the World Record consumers are culpable.

So only she is at fault?

[UofMfan]

Originally Posted by apocalipstic

Are people who buy the Guiness Book of World Records or support the types of magazines and websites she is making money from culpable?

I think an entire thread could be devoted to this question.

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by UofMfan

I think an entire thread could be devoted to this question.

I think as long as we as a society continue to be fascinated with people like this and continue to buy the books, we are encouraging people like her.

[UofMfan]

Originally Posted by apocalipstic

I think as long as we as a society continue to be fascinated with people like this and continue to buy the books, we are encouraging people like her.

I agree. I think there lies the real problem.

[Soon]

Originally Posted by apocalipstic

So only she is at fault?

I didn't say that; I do feel that there is some culpability in the men in her life who have encouraged her obesity to suit their desires.

However, again, she has chosen to allow herself to grow as part of their (and her own) fulfillment.

I would feel the same way with a woman who is intent on becoming extremely thin in order to cater to someone else's idea of beauty-even if she felt sexier for doing so.