Have You Found Your Soul Mate?

[bigbutchmistie]

Originally Posted by Ldyluck88

Soulmate is just that, A Mate of the Soul, which to me is not in the physical sense, tho I wish I would have that kind of a connection with a partner.

Yep me too I wished I could connect like that with a partner

[bigbutchmistie]

I read this article today and thought Id share.. Really makes ya think








Calling Forth a Soulmate



How do I draw a soulmate into my life? You don’t. I’ve read plenty of books that tell you how to do it, but I don’t believe for a minute that you can place your cosmic order and your perfect ideal twin soul is going to materialize just like that at your front door. It doesn’t happen that way. You can open your heart and mind to finding a beautiful loving relationship, but chances are that using the word soulmate will almost jinx you from finding it. Why?



For many of us, when we think of a soulmate, we think of someone perfect. Someone who is gorgeous, brilliant, funny, naturally happy and kind. We think of someone who wants exactly the same things out of life that we want. We picture a meeting right out of the movies where both parties meet on the street and instantly fall madly head over heels in love. We think that there will never be any conflict beyond a quaint debate over what colors to paint the baby’s nursery. We imagine lovemaking that is so phenomenally perfect the first time that one cries from the sheer artistic beauty and telepathic oneness. All problems and challenges in our lives will suddenly melt away into faint memories because our soulmate has arrived and their presence alone is so cosmic and amazing that all else pales in comparison.



Yeah, and if I say my affirmations with enough conviction, gold coins are going to start growing instead of dandelions in my yard too! Wake up! If you’re dreaming of that kind of a soulmate, then you need to rent some good movies and call it good. Love doesn’t go like that and you know better. Look at it this way…. You are the other half of that equation. Let’s be serious. If you are someone’s soulmate, and they find you -- are you capable of being that incredibly flawless and perfect for them? No of course not. Nor are they. Soulmates are as mixed up and weird as you are. They may have the same flaws as you do or completely different ones. If you are holding out for that fantasy, then you are playing a psychological game with yourself. You have created an impossible dream to hide behind so that you don’t have to really risk falling in love with a real live human being, warts and all.



Yes, I do believe that there are extremely rare cases where one ‘feels’ or ‘knows’ there is a certain person they are meant to find and they are haunted by the need to find that one person. They are doomed to hunt for that needle in a haystack. But let’s get serious, that isn’t the norm. We have all heard so much about soulmates that we just think it would be really cool. Well it’s not. It sucks to spend a lifetime passing up real love with real people because somewhere out there is this voice calling your name. You doubt your sanity and spend most of your life lonely and searching. Don’t do it. Find real love with real people.



Change your definition of soulmate. Call to yourself someone who is open and real. Call to yourself someone who is genuine and capable of love on a real everyday level in a real everyday world where people get up and go to work and pay bills. Call to yourself someone who knows how to show and express their love without manipulation and head games. Call forth a forever kind of love. Call forth a best friend that you can sit with in your rocking chair on the front porch when you are too old to make love anymore. Call someone who loves you enough to kick you in the butt when you are screwing up. Call forth someone who will shout from the rooftop when you are deserving of praise too. Call forth someone who is a loyal and faithful lover willing to learn and grow with you behind closed doors. Leave the rest to fate. Don’t define them. Don’t imagine the look of their face or the color of their eyes. Don’t predetermine anything else about them. Let them be exactly who they are and you be who you are. Then work on making yourself into the same type of person that I just described so that you will be worthy of them when they show up.



When you go through your ceremonies, affirmations, and prayers for your soulmate, ask the heavens to help you to be open-minded and to not judge what that person is supposed to be. Ask for a feeling of their essence so that you will recognize it when you see them for real. How does it feel to be with them? If you had a perfect ideal partner, you would not be able to relax and be yourself because they were not of the same energy as you. Raise your own self to be your best and ask for a partner that matches your level of development so that you can grow together. You don’t want to have a partner who is in every way superior to you because they are perfect and you are only human do you?



Unless you can lighten up your definition of what a soulmate is, then you really shouldn’t use the term. It will only bring you loneliness and heartache if you insist on waiting for perfection. The best advise I can give you if you want an amazing forever kind of love is to be healthy, happy, and independent. Quit worrying about when love will find you and get busy with living your life. Keep your heart open and your eyes open for the possible love of a lifetime, but don’t obsess over it. Whatever is meant to be will be -- whether you call it to you or not. Call for help being a beautiful soul. Trust that the rest will fall into place in it’s own perfect time.

[Oiler41]

Originally Posted by Puplove

I thought I had met my soulmate long ago, but turns out it was just me wishing so much that we would be. I now know the difference, because when I met my true soulmate, the feeling was so deep and so natural and real that I knew without a doubt -- and so did he!
So...yes I have...finally.

Yes, I did! My soul jumped when I met you and I do know, without a doubt. So...yes I have...finally.

[bigbutchmistie]

Originally Posted by Oiler41

Yes, I did! My soul jumped when I met you and I do know, without a doubt. So...yes I have...finally.

awwww yall are so cute

[Oiler41]

Originally Posted by Puplove

I get that the idea of soulmate would put pressure on someone or you...but what I found (and what also was one of the many things that made me so sure this is a true soulmate) is that we connect so naturally and easily - there never was any pressure. We both just knew, and we have a connection that goes down to our cores without the pressure or question of thrusting hopes and dreams etc -- we just ARE. And that is perfect. And that we are together makes it very peaceful and giddily joyful at the same time as it is so EASY and grounded.

I think feeling responsibility and pressure is an indication that one or both of you are hoping/wishing you'd be soulmates and want so much to make it so...but it ain't happenin. That is how my first "wish you were my soulmate" relationship went, and is a wonderful contrast to my "know you are my soulmate" treasure!

Ditto,,,and furthermore,,ditto. It is, and has been from the beginning, as natural as breathing. The attempt to force a square peg into a round hole is something that I suppose nearly everyone has tried at least once in their life. We need not go through that motion further. We have found that perfect fit, and for that, I am grateful every day!

Glynn

[redrose]

i did

[PinkieLee]

Yes, I do believe in soulmates... but I don't believe that you only have one in your entire lifetime. I believe that you have soulmates for different times in your life.

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. Each relationship serves a purpose or teaches us lessons on the journey of who we are. Soulmates consist of not only lovers, but can be friends and family as well. It's a connection, that you feel in your soul, that they are meant to be in your life, where you feel completely at peace that you've arrived home. Along the way, I've had that with 2 partners and with my BBFF.

I feel as though if you are only focusing on the goal of finding your "one true love in life" you aren't truly living and learning. Take that energy and focus on living life itself... you can write your own happy ending.

[waxnrope]

I need to think what that term means ... to me. And then I will return, I suspect, with an answer to post.

[Heart]

I think when we obsess about finding a soulmate, we may be waiting for someone to rescue us, make it all better. Ain't gonna happen.

I'm not cynical (I'm NOT!) Just skeptical.

[Beau]

and yep, it does happen ...really and truly

[Apocalipstic]

I really am not sure that I believe in the soul....

However, I have found someone I love whom I have a ton in common with!

Remember a long term relationship is about commonalities and hard work, there is no magic "we were meant for each other" where everything is always easy.

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by PinkieLee

Yes, I do believe in soulmates... but I don't believe that you only have one in your entire lifetime. I believe that you have soulmates for different times in your life.

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. Each relationship serves a purpose or teaches us lessons on the journey of who we are. Soulmates consist of not only lovers, but can be friends and family as well. It's a connection, that you feel in your soul, that they are meant to be in your life, where you feel completely at peace that you've arrived home. Along the way, I've had that with 2 partners and with my BBFF.

I feel as though if you are only focusing on the goal of finding your "one true love in life" you aren't truly living and learning. Take that energy and focus on living life itself... you can write your own happy ending.

I think this is a really good point.

Years ago when the romantics wrote about soul mates, people lived for 40 years mostly. Now that we are free to love and live longer, wonderful people come in and out of our lives!

We change and sometimes who we were at 20 is not who we are at 30 or at 40 or 60.

We can have many loves over the years and it's all GOOD!

[Deborah]

I thought I did but alas it was not meant to be...a sadness dwells in my heart

[katsarecool]

I am positive I believe in soul mates and that this can be true of our pets. I do however believe one can have many soul mates through the years and in spite of a separation or lost connection they can remain in our hearts forever!

[DomnNC]

I found my soulmate and I was blessed to have her in my life for close to 27 years, 10 years as a friend and almost 17 as my wife. Rest in peace darling, as we always said, together forever and one day we'll be together again.

[Soft*Silver]

I have been single for two years now. Contently single most of the time. Certainly content the past year. And in this time, I have learned awhole lot about friendships as opposed to relationships. I have spent my time gleening friendships instead of romances and have found some incredible life long friends. Some, I swear, are soul friends. As deep and rich and chocolatey as a soul mate but I might not have appreciated their qualities had I been dog sniffing a relationship instead of friendships. I can feel their arms embrace me spiritually in some cosmic fold, secure over the ages, throughout time, over space, no more obstacles in this life to seperate us. I feel so cherished by them...and I can weep over the love I have for them in my own heart...

I have grown so much as a soul these past two years. Sometimes I am just the earth girl whining. Sometimes I am the spirit soaring. Either way, its a delight in this life...both sides of the same coin...

[MsTinkerbelly]

Why yes,yes I have.

[katsarecool]

Originally Posted by softness

I have been single for two years now. Contently single most of the time. Certainly content the past year. And in this time, I have learned awhole lot about friendships as opposed to relationships. I have spent my time gleening friendships instead of romances and have found some incredible life long friends. Some, I swear, are soul friends. As deep and rich and chocolatey as a soul mate but I might not have appreciated their qualities had I been dog sniffing a relationship instead of friendships. I can feel their arms embrace me spiritually in some cosmic fold, secure over the ages, throughout time, over space, no more obstacles in this life to seperate us. I feel so cherished by them...and I can weep over the love I have for them in my own heart...

I have grown so much as a soul these past two years. Sometimes I am just the earth girl whining. Sometimes I am the spirit soaring. Either way, its a delight in this life...both sides of the same coin...

Excellent post and I am of a similar state of mind!

[diamondrose]

I think your soulmate doesn't have to be your partner. I think your soulmate can be a best friend

[asphaltcowboi]

yes i think my soul mate is reba! im just sure of it