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Old 02-09-2012, 07:58 PM   #1
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Default The Fat Positive Lounge

Just a place to hang out, talk silly or serious, about fat or not about fat (and if it is about fat- with a fat positive politic*). Sometimes I really need a safe space to be with other fat people who have a side to them that feels healthiest in a fat positive space- whether we are talking fat politics or just goofing around knowing that we are with like-minded friend . Oh, and of course you don't have to be fat to post here! It's about the politic, not the size!

*Hang out a bit on http://www.bigfatblog.com if you don't have an idea of what a safe, fat positive space looks/feels/sounds like. Please don't ask on the thread, because again, I'm creating this space specifically for an environment that is not debating fat positivity but for having some bonding with like-minded souls
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Old 02-09-2012, 08:10 PM   #2
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I recently read the book "Hungry" by Crystal Renn and highly recommend it! She writes about her journey to a highly successful modeling career, where she goes from being anorexic to being a plus-size model. After allowing herself to eat what she wants and not focus on what size she is, she has her biggest success! It's such an uplifting book, and she is so encouraging of women to allow their body to be whatever their natural size is. The writing style is down-to-earth and full of helpful advice for being one's best self. One quote that helped me even though it is obvious is, "You simply cannot look to the wider world for a perpetual stream of affirmation. It won't be there. And life is too short to hate yourself." No doubt!
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Old 02-09-2012, 09:00 PM   #3
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I have to say that a new place that I have found it safe for fat friendliness and gay friendliness and women friendliness is The Graham Norton Show. I feel so relaxed when I watch, it's TV that improves my mood.






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Old 02-09-2012, 09:27 PM   #4
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*subscribing*

i so love the literature you suggest Jenn, as you know! ♥
and of course, i'm all over a thread with you in it & about fat positivity..
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Old 02-10-2012, 08:14 AM   #5
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i love this thread so much! thank you for starting it.

some other links i like are:
http://www.kateharding.net/
http://www.fatnutritionist.com/
http://www.adipositivity.com/ (nsfw)
http://queerfatfemme.com/
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Old 02-10-2012, 09:23 AM   #6
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Great thread!

I have a handful of badges that I made years ago that say: “I’m a whole lotta Quirky and I’ve got a BIG Bum (and PROUD of it!)”. LOL!

When I lived in Glasgow, Scotland I was an Artists model for the Glasgow School of Art; there were quite a few of us BBWs who would model for the Life Drawing classes and some of us were trained Artists. Before that, I did Life drawings/paintings of BBWs who wanted a gift for their partners; I have my innate clumsiness to thank for this, lol! I dropped on of my drawings in the Art supply shop and the shop assistant admired it and asked if I did commissions.

I’ve been working on a hand embroidery of my luscious, sexy, fat self in various (tasteful) poses that one day (when I eventually get it finished….it’s on my ‘to do list’ mentioned in the Crafters UNITE thread, lol!) and will hang in the bedroom or bathroom….

I was going to get on with sorting out my hair accessories draw, only I’m too scared to throw any out ‘just in case I will want to wear them, again’, lol! I have my favourites, but, I have my moments when I want to wear something in my hair that’s different for a change….after all, a change is as good as a rest, right? LOL!

Soooo, this sensual fat Femme can’t decide what hair accessories to part with; or, even if I should part with them! ….It’s not like it’s a major dilemma or even the end of the world if I can’t decide; it’s that I have so many Alice bands, barrettes, scrunchies, and hair flowers, etc, etc, that I’m like a kid in a sweetie shop trying to decide.

When I’m at home I let my hair cascade over my luscious cuddles and curves….this usually results in me sitting on my hair and pinning myself to the Sofa, much to the amusement of others! LOL! I often sit with my hair pooled into my lap….it’s makes a great lap blanket, lol!

When I’m getting ready to go out in the mornings (evenings, too, but, that’s a whole other predicament, lol!), mostly I wear my hair in a plait with either my favourite hair flowers or tribal hair elastics and an Alice band or barrette that compliment my clothes for that day.

Hair accessories for me are what shoes are to most women, lol! ….You know what? I’m not going to even think about sorting through them all; I bought them because I like them (and I’m like a Magpie when I see them, lol!), so I’m just going to keep them in my draw and wear them when I want and add to the collection when I walk past the shop or section, lol!
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Old 02-10-2012, 09:27 AM   #7
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Originally Posted by LeftWriteFemme View Post
I have to say that a new place that I have found it safe for fat friendliness and gay friendliness and women friendliness is The Graham Norton Show. I feel so relaxed when I watch, it's TV that improves my mood.






I love watching Graham Norton when my friends record him for me....Bill Bailey, too.

I just had to swoon over KD in the first photo....*Sighs*

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Old 02-11-2012, 12:34 AM   #8
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Ahhhhh...Home Sweet Home
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Old 02-11-2012, 10:00 AM   #9
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What is everyone up to this weekend?
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Old 02-11-2012, 11:59 AM   #10
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What is everyone up to this weekend?
Outrageously flirting, am I!! Cleaning apt. to get ready for BIG inspection Monday. Will ride down to the water later this weekend..and watch for the dolphins! YES they DO exist...grin!
Talking on the phone at some point...AND enjoying this delicious thread..and you, gorgeous one? love YOU mostest!
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Old 02-11-2012, 08:54 PM   #11
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This is AWESOME !! I am so positive about being A BIG SEXY GIRL !!!!!!!!!!!!! I think ATTITUDE is everything !!
My hips don't lie and neither do I !!!!!!!!

Thank you again !!
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Old 02-11-2012, 09:24 PM   #12
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The most positive I've ever felt about my own body wasn't even when being sexual with someone. I was a life model in college, and it was a shock to see how sensuously the students sculpted or drew my body, compared to how I saw myself. It was a total kick.

I want to be healthy, it's true, and I don't want problems to creep in as I get older. But, having said that, if I'm curvy, that's what I am. Your attitude is far more important than your weight or the size of anything.

NYCfemBBW, when I met you at the Reunion, I didn't even notice size. I thought, "Wow, I love her hair!" .

I recommend the book "Feel Good Naked" by Laure Redmond. It's not a diet, although it recommends healthy eating (both content and how we eat). It's much more about self-esteem from the inside out. That to me, is hot in anyone.
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Old 02-11-2012, 09:34 PM   #13
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Ah well, this is a weekend of feeling miraculous, I had a health scare this time last week and today I am so much better it is making me giddy.
I have been juicing carrots and saving the pulp, so today I made carrot cake with brown rice flour and cooked some red beans and then made this crazy thing that I love ........Jello with beans, odd, I know.

I went to the post office today, mailed hideous birthday cards that I made for my parents, along with powdered peanut butter and some tree branch buttons for my mom and the last Harry Potter DVD. When I got to the post office a package arrived from my mom, it's a huge quilt that she made from fabric that was part of a bequest made to her. It is so beautiful and even more so because Mom's dying friend had thought of me and had given her this fabric and quilt pattern.

I'm sad that Whitney Houston died, she is my age, so scary what addiction does. I feel so fortunate to have gotten sober young and stayed sober, not everyone is so lucky, I am nothing but grateful, though my heart breaks for her family and fans.

well, I've rambled enough. Hope you all are having a great day!

Sherrie
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Old 02-11-2012, 10:20 PM   #14
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The thicker the cushion, the better the pushin'

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My hips don't lie and neither do I !!!!!!!!
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Old 02-11-2012, 11:06 PM   #15
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Old 02-12-2012, 07:43 AM   #16
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The most positive I've ever felt about my own body wasn't even when being sexual with someone. I was a life model in college, and it was a shock to see how sensuously the students sculpted or drew my body, compared to how I saw myself. It was a total kick.

I want to be healthy, it's true, and I don't want problems to creep in as I get older. But, having said that, if I'm curvy, that's what I am. Your attitude is far more important than your weight or the size of anything.

NYCfemBBW, when I met you at the Reunion, I didn't even notice size. I thought, "Wow, I love her hair!" .

I recommend the book "Feel Good Naked" by Laure Redmond. It's not a diet, although it recommends healthy eating (both content and how we eat). It's much more about self-esteem from the inside out. That to me, is hot in anyone.

Seeing the Artwork of another of how they see us is truly eye-opening and inspiring! Even though I’m from a family BBWs and some BHM and had positive role models, there have been times when my body confidence has wobbled. I’ll always have cuddles and curves thanks to my genetics.

It’s funny (….not funny haha!) that all the BBWs I’ve known, many are fairly healthy eaters and do a lot of walking.

Yesterday, one of the blokes at the Disabled Arts Studio started dancing to the music that was playing….to say he was dancing like your Dad at a family Wedding was an understatement! LOL! He had his thumbs up in the air and said: “This music’s got a good beat!” I was struggling to breathe I was laughing so hard! LOL!

Today, K has seen me at my worst! She is handling me in a foul mood well and I’ve apologised to her and explained why I’m feeling like this. I always explain my bad moods and apologise that way people know where they stand (or sit if they are doing so, lol!).

It’s so sad when someone dies young….
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Old 02-12-2012, 06:48 PM   #17
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I went to a small Burlesque show last night and even though it was a typical 6th street Austin deal, with standing room only and the patrons being squished in the space like sardines, I absolutely loved it.

The women were all sizes and fantastical and lovely and they celebrated humor and sexiness and there was even one butch-femme type of number.

Loved it.

*I* felt sexy watching them being sexy on stage. Their confidence rained down on me like the glitter and confetti one of the girls shook out into the crowd.

These aren't from last night, but it's the same troupe:




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Old 02-13-2012, 12:54 AM   #18
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I love this thread! Jen, a wonderful idea!

I havent been around much lately because I am busy opening a....wait for it.....

A plus size women's resale shop!

Oh yes indeedy! I have over 80 bags of clothes in my dining room (its massive the mountain it created!) and am picking up more bags tomorrow from 4 other people. I have people from NJ, Mass, Vt, Florida, and Texas sending me clothes for my shop! For free!

why free? Because as soon as they hear about my shop, they immediately feel "part of"..they want it to succeed because they want a place of their own! It is as much a social experience as well as a retail location!

My case worker at our Bureau of Vocational Rehabilitation and my advisor from our local small business dept of our university are working closely with me to develop a business plan, select a location, make purchases, etc. They have never seen an automatic flood of donations to a business that is not a non profit, before in their lives!

I feel alive again. I feel like I am giving back once more. And I feel wanted. I get messages and emails every day from women locally and across the US who are hearing it from friends of friends. Some tell me their life story of how hard it was and still is to be a plus size. I share my own story, of the internal damage and how I had a life threatening eating disorder in my 20s because I wanted to be the "desired image", only to be sexually assaulted after obtaining that goal. When you objectify yourself, your obsession takes so much out of you. I have been very comfortable ever since then, about my weight. Even after my surgery on my stumach, and having lost weight, I will never be a size 8. I am always going to be a size 16 because thats where I feel the most comfortable. I realized it as soon as my weight dipped to 14. I was trying too hard to lose the weight the Drs expected me to lose. I am perfectly happy at 16. Then again, I was happy at size 22 too, but my body hurt with my conditions, from the extra weight.

So here I am, opening up this store and hearing everyone's life story. How sad it is that there is very little difference between the 64 year old telling me her story of growing up fat, and the 16 year old who is in the process of it. A couple have told me they never knew a single person who could say they were comfortable with weight, before they met me.

this little shop of mine is going to be "home" too. My case worker and advisor suggested for me to only sell online and give up the idea of a store front. I refused. This store is important to too many women. and to me. I am going to be doing monthly get togethers too, so we can meet and look at each other and see the beauty in all our shapes and sizes. I want to do a fashion show for a charity but right now, no one wants to do it except one woman. Give me time. They will sign up.

My shops name is The Pretty and Plus Shop. I hope you dont mind me talking about it in here. I am not trying to drum up business. I simply want to share this phenomena of the reaction I am getting!
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Old 02-13-2012, 01:10 AM   #19
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Old 02-13-2012, 10:43 PM   #20
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